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posted by LaminatorX on Saturday July 26 2014, @11:48PM   Printer-friendly
from the Satellite-of-Love dept.

The Washington Post reports on a Russian scientific space mission dispatched to study the effects of weightlessness on various biological processes which continues to transmit data but does not respond to commands from mission control. Non-National Enquirer level reporting on this incident (cited by the Post reporter) at Interfax and ITAR-TASS .

Business Insider and elsewhere report that:

Last year, more than half of the 45 mice aboard a Bion-M1 capsule died during its flight, the first Russian mission to launch animals into space in 17 years. And as for the rest of the species, they were euthanized on landing so scientists could see how much they had been affected.

Now, sadly, it looks like we can add another five to the death toll. A bunch of swinging gecko-lovers are spiraling uncontrolled through space aboard Russia's Foton-M4 satellite and are unlikely to set their sticky little feet on anyone's ceiling again.

At least they're all on an excellent mission to make a two-month long space sex tape for Russian scientists to watch ... and monitor the effects of gravity on sexual behavior and embryonic development.

Some fruit flies and mushrooms are also along with them for the ride, but it's unlikely any will return.

According to http://rt.com/news/175864-foton-roscosmos-gecko-sex/, contact has been re-established with the satellite.

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  • (Score: -1, Offtopic) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday July 26 2014, @11:58PM

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday July 26 2014, @11:58PM (#74292)

    > contact has been re-established with the satellite.

    After Putin personally flew to orbit under his own power and wrestled the malfunctioning systems into submission with his bare hands.

    He's such a powerful man that he didn't even need a spacesuit. The skin on his smooth, bare chest was all he needed to survive the vacuum of outer space.

  • (Score: 2, Funny) by Horse With Stripes on Sunday July 27 2014, @12:44AM

    by Horse With Stripes (577) on Sunday July 27 2014, @12:44AM (#74293)

    Not to worry, comrades. Our 'Gecko Sex Space Capsule' was insured by Geico. 15 minutes saved us everything but the ridicule.

  • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday July 27 2014, @12:55AM

    by Anonymous Coward on Sunday July 27 2014, @12:55AM (#74294)

    Russian sex mission gets out of control of the government for a while, then they regain control. Where is the surprise there?

  • (Score: 3, Funny) by MrGuy on Sunday July 27 2014, @04:15PM

    by MrGuy (1007) on Sunday July 27 2014, @04:15PM (#74408)

    of the old Muppets Show "Pigs In Space!" is a lot racier than the original...