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from the beginning-a-stimulating-discussion dept.
The future of sex could be pretty interactive, but it's starting with men.
Top porn streaming company Pornhub announced a new channel of interactive videos that will work with the latest generation of connected male sex toys. The videos, according Pornhub, will work with the Fleshlight Launch and Kiiroo Onyx, featuring "an eclectic mix of content, offering an assortment of themes and appealing to various target audiences."
Sex toys and content geared to women are arriving later on, working with OhMiBod, We-Vibe, Lovense Lush and Kiiroo Pearl, but Pornhub didn't confirm when.
The new interactive channel will also work with VR eventually, combining the synced content with immersive video.
Thank goodness. I'm fresh out of latinum for Quark's holosuites.
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @10:37AM (7 children)
If it can be controlled via the internet then it can be hacked via the internet. The first news story about a DDoS of these devices will be a rather interesting mix of euphemisms and innuendo.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @10:44AM (3 children)
What would the hackers do? cause pre-ejaculation? ;)
Now VR could actually set of epilepsy etc which can have consequences.
(Score: 1, Troll) by choose another one on Thursday June 29 2017, @11:41AM (2 children)
> What would the hackers do? cause pre-ejaculation? ;)
Nah, you are thinking too narrowly.
Really really evil hackers will hack the video and the controls to ensure that those who start out wanking to white blonde girl porn will end up ejaculating to big black gay porn.
This will cause havoc in the alt-right and uber-christian Trump-supporter communities, it'll be a massively successful liberal conspiracy that none of the victims will be able to talk about without years of therapy, which they won't be able to afford because they don't do health insurance and therapy is a liberal con anyway. Best thing is no one will be able to tell if it was hackers or porn providers since it's all California anyway...
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @01:28PM (1 child)
Pfft, weak. Lurk moar on the internet, normie.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @09:02PM
The only normies are those who are sexually attracted to real people. Enough of this nonsense.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @04:33PM (1 child)
> a rather interesting mix of euphemisms and innuendo.
Back in the 1980s (in a gaming company research lab) this was called "teledildonics". Looks like the name has stuck,
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teledildonics [wikipedia.org]
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @05:05PM
i've seen that mentioned before but it's still hilarious!
(Score: 2) by Rivenaleem on Friday June 30 2017, @01:56PM
In who's endo?? *wink*wink*
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @10:51AM
perfect for low res streaming
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @12:50PM (3 children)
There was a patent covering almost 100% of the online to user sexual toy market. It is expiring this year or next year. Except to see a ton of new interactive sex products in the upcoming few years.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @01:02PM (2 children)
There are still some patents for MP3. I bet there are at least ten sex toy patents for each orifice.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @02:01PM (1 child)
The last patent for MP3 that mattered expired earlier this year.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @02:27PM
Did your team of lawyers tell you that?
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday June 29 2017, @01:10PM
Install shitty app for sex toys, doesn't work with VPN.
(Score: 5, Touché) by JeanCroix on Thursday June 29 2017, @01:13PM (2 children)
Um, sex has always been really damn interactive. It's the future of net pr0n that we're really talking about here. (Yes, I realize the sentence was from TFA and not the submitter.)
(Score: 2) by Rivenaleem on Friday June 30 2017, @01:59PM (1 child)
Wait, you can do sex with _other_ people??
(Score: 2) by Justin Case on Friday June 30 2017, @03:55PM
Yes, if you get their explicit affirmative specific permission for each new frontier, at the time and in writing or on video so you can prove it in court when they change their mind.
Of course, you can't ask for that permission without committing the crime of harassment, unless your request was and remains "welcome", something you cannot know in advance because it is determined by the prospective victim, who, even if they are willing, also can't tell you because that would be harassment too.
Should you decide to brave the odds and give it your best shot (haha) anyway, be certain not to exercise any selectivity or discrimination in choosing your intended(s). We must be fair to everyone you know.
Welcome to Ludicrous Leftie Liberal Life.
Or, you could just pull up a video with an exciting new partner who's eager to indulge your latest fantasy, blow a load and be done in less time than it takes to write this post. Bonus: no child support or alimony for the next $BIGNUM years.
(Score: 2) by chewbacon on Thursday June 29 2017, @01:24PM
Yeah, well, I still jerk off manually.
(Score: 3, Interesting) by takyon on Thursday June 29 2017, @10:50PM
Can Hell's #1 succubus Gwyneth Paltrow reach out to me through VR?
[SIG] 10/28/2017: Soylent Upgrade v14 [soylentnews.org]
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday June 30 2017, @07:36AM (1 child)
A fleshlight is a male sex toy? Does it identify as male, or how does that work?
Or is it simply a case of the Christian fundamentalist hetero-normative view being applied to sex toys, such that anything with a vagine is for men and anything with a penis is for women only, and thus fleshlight = male sex toy and dildo = female sex toy?
To put it simple: If a gay man uses a dildo, where does the "fe" in "female sex toy" come from?
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday June 30 2017, @12:08PM
It cums from being a dildo made of iron (Fe).