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I think we should all toss in a few dollars to fund this Kickstarter campaign. Only in the age of the Internet can we actually turn the tables on the people who censor us!
"Make the Censors Watch 'Paint Drying'" aims to fund a film that will be submitted to the British Board of Film Classification. The more money is raised, the longer the film that some poor censor will have to endure.
As film maker Charlie Lyne describes the project:
The British Board of Film Certification (previously known as the British Board of Film Censors) was established in 1912 to ensure films remained free of 'indecorous dancing', 'references to controversial politics' and 'men and women in bed together', amongst other perceived indiscretions.
Today, it continues to censor and in some cases ban films, while UK law ensures that, in effect, a film cannot be released in British cinemas without a BBFC certificate.
Each certificate costs around £1000 for a feature film of average length. ... Luckily, there's a flipside to all of this: while filmmakers are required to pay the BBFC to certify their work, the BBFC are also required to sit through whatever we pay them to watch.
That's why I'm Kickstarting a BBFC certificate for my new film Paint Drying — a single, unbroken shot of white paint drying on a brick wall.
As of the time of submission [2015-11-19 03:05:43], the total is up to £1,799 ($2747 US). The handy web site here tells us that that will finance 3 hours, 59 minutes and 25 seconds of paint drying action!
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday November 20 2015, @09:06AM
1) Make 4-hour film about paint drying
2) Insert one 0.5-second segment of really nasty action somewhere between 2-3 hours.
3) Movie gets approved because nobody took attention
4) Sue the censors because they won't think of the children
5) Profit!
(Score: 3, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Friday November 20 2015, @09:25AM
4.5) Announce "Paint Drying 2: The wall strikes back"
(Score: 5, Funny) by FatPhil on Friday November 20 2015, @10:47AM
Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people; the smallest discuss themselves
(Score: 4, Interesting) by GreatAuntAnesthesia on Friday November 20 2015, @09:29AM
Came here to post this.
Alternative: Have the drying paint be the paint on a complex and detailled painting / mural. Start really close up so it's just a full screen of blank colour. Very very slowly, over X hours, pan out until the full painting is revealed at the end. Hidden somewhere in the painting, Where's Wally style, is a teeny tiny depiction of something utterly obscene.
(Score: 2) by Phoenix666 on Friday November 20 2015, @03:28PM
I like that thinking. Or, a video that's almost pure white playing very slowly.
Washington DC delenda est.