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from the they-should-be-as-unhappy-as-the-rest-of-us dept.
Submitted via IRC for AndyTheAbsurd
Despite the many challenges faced by people in a same-sex relationship, a study made by two students of the University of Queensland concluded that this kind of relationship is happier compared to the normal relationship we know as male to female bond.
Researchers Francisco Perales and Janeen Baxter said that the conclusion of their study is a strong counter-narrative to the usual thinking that same-sex relationships are conflictual, unhappy, and dysfunctional.
The conclusion of the study, which was published in the academic journal Family Relations, was derived after the researchers surveyed 25,000 people in the United Kingdom and 9,000 others in Australia.
Also at Francisco Perales, Janeen Baxter. Sexual Identity and Relationship Quality in Australia and the United Kingdom. Family Relations, 2017; DOI: 10.1111/fare.12293
(Score: 3, Insightful) by Azuma Hazuki on Wednesday December 27 2017, @03:40AM (4 children)
Women want sex too, don't be fooled. Some of us have "manly" sex drives. No, not me, but I do want it a couple of times a week minimum. It's just not polite or "ladylike" to mention, you see.
I've been told, BY a man, that men are much less complicated about sex, that it all happens in one place and emotions don't play much part in it. That's...hard to comprehend, for me. I couldn't ever have sex with someone I don't at least care very much for, if not someone I'm actually in love with. The thought of somehow being able to just fuck, with no attachment to your partner at all beyond lust, is just impossible for me to imagine. It sounds empty and sad, too.
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 1, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday December 27 2017, @04:19AM
it all happens in one place
Supporting diagram. [blogdailyherald.com]
-- OriginalOwner_ [soylentnews.org]
(Score: 5, Interesting) by Unixnut on Wednesday December 27 2017, @08:48AM (1 child)
"I've been told, BY a man, that men are much less complicated about sex, that it all happens in one place and emotions don't play much part in it. That's...hard to comprehend, for me. I couldn't ever have sex with someone I don't at least care very much for, if not someone I'm actually in love with. The thought of somehow being able to just fuck, with no attachment to your partner at all beyond lust, is just impossible for me to imagine. It sounds empty and sad, too."
I can tell you, as a man as well, that I can't have sex with someone I don't have feelings for, or know very well. Good sex requires trust, effort, and an innate understanding of what turns your partner on. All of which require time and effort to get to know the person, their personality, etc, and see if you actually have chemistry (which includes emotional bonds). I can't just meet someone and have a one night stand, I need to have some kind of attachment to them as a person, rather than a fuck object.
I don't like this trend of trying to stereotype genders into particular sexual behavior. I hear the "men just want unemotional sex, it is pure lust, etc...." really quite often. And yes, I have met men like that, although IMO they are like that due to other emotional problems rather than some innate "male behaviour". Likewise I met many women who are like that as well.
Interestingly, the "Sex for pleasure/lust" bit I found to be disproportionately skewed to homosexual/bisexual men and women I know (the number of times gay men propositioned me to go to the toilets for a "fun time" are numerous. Even if I were inclined to fuck men, I would not be able to just meet a random stranger in the club, and have sex there and then).
Likewise the Lesbians/Bi women I know really get laid a lot (as in really a lot, more than any man I know), and seem to have no trouble picking up women at a bar, taking them home (or just having fun in the toilets). They told me it is because women feel less threatened with another woman. If a man tried to pick them up at a bar, they worry about pregnancy, getting raped, STIs, or if the guy is violent. If it is a woman, they feel more like it is harmless fun, and are more game for a one night stand.
I guess when your method of having sex carries no risk of unwanted pregnancy, you can really indulge in it with a wide variety of partners, but as you said about yourself (and I am very much like you when it comes to sex and partners) you cannot pigeonhole people.
There are those capable of unattached, emotional sex, and those who cannot, of all genders and proclivities.
I cannot comment on whether their lives are "empty and sad", because they seem really quite happy with their lives as they are, which is important (far happier than I am in mine, at least). Some do also have long term partners as well, but as they are honest about having "open" relationships in that way. Also very common with homosexuals. I hardly ever heard about an open straight relationship, but many open homosexual relationships. Not sure why. I guess straight relationships are supposed to be "traditional", which includes the fidelity aspect, and with the eventual goal of children who do better in a non single parent structure. while gay ones already broke a massive taboo, generally don't have/want kids, and so are more relaxed about the whole sex/fidelity thing.
(Score: 4, Insightful) by Grishnakh on Wednesday December 27 2017, @05:42PM
ome do also have long term partners as well, but as they are honest about having "open" relationships in that way. Also very common with homosexuals. I hardly ever heard about an open straight relationship, but many open homosexual relationships. Not sure why. I guess straight relationships are supposed to be "traditional", which includes the fidelity aspect, and with the eventual goal of children who do better in a non single parent structure. while gay ones already broke a massive taboo, generally don't have/want kids, and so are more relaxed about the whole sex/fidelity thing.
I think that's it. If you're homosexual, you've already explicitly first questioned and then openly rejected one of society's major norms, so it's easy to do the same with the rest of society's norms. I think this is easy to do in many ways, such as rejecting religion. Once you realize that the "one true path" that was taught to you in your upbringing is total bullshit (or at least just doesn't work for everyone and doesn't leave any room for people who don't fit that mold), it's totally logical to then extend that line of thinking to everything else you've been taught.
(Score: 2) by Gaaark on Thursday December 28 2017, @12:42AM
Okay, I over simplified: men, for the most part, especially when young, want sex more than, generally, women.
That doesn't leave out an emotional response or foreplay or love: I'm just saying men GENERALLY want more sex than women and women are GENERALLY more willing to accept an emotional relationship where as men want a more physical relationship.
I'm guessing that 2 guys in love will, over the course of a two year relationship, have more sex than two girls.
--- Please remind me if I haven't been civil to you: I'm channeling MDC. ---Gaaark 2.0 ---