SoylentNews is people
SoylentNews
Why do people stay in unsatisfying romantic relationships? A new study suggests it may be because they view leaving as bad for their partner. The study, being published in the November 2018 issue of the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, explored the possibility that people deciding whether to end a relationship consider not only their own desires but also how much they think their partner wants and needs the relationship to continue.
Study that finds it's not just the investment of time, resources and emotion
[Source]: University of Utah
[Abtract]: How interdependent are stay/leave decisions?[requires js]
This discussion has been archived.
No new comments can be posted.
Study Suggests People Who Stay in Unsatisfying Relationships View Leaving as Bad for Their Partner
|
Log In/Create an Account
| Top
| 56 comments
| Search Discussion
The Fine Print: The following comments are owned by whoever posted them. We are not responsible for them in any way.
Ten years of rejection slips is nature's way of telling you to stop writing.
-- R. Geis
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday October 23 2018, @12:41PM (14 children)
wtf is with all the downmodding here?
*logs in and fixes*
(Score: 3, Interesting) by RS3 on Tuesday October 23 2018, @01:25PM (13 children)
> wtf is with all the downmodding here?
I've been wondering that for a long time. Downmods sting, esp. when it makes no sense. Makes me mostly keep quiet when I would like to join in. I'm sure it affects many/most of us. A lot of good collaboration, information, wisdom, progress is lost. I rarely downmod, and only when it's an obvious troll. Never just because I disagree with someone's opinion, view, experience, etc.
It might be interesting to keep track of, and reveal, who downmods what, or at least a running count of up vs. downmods. I don't know, more important things to think about right now...
(Score: 4, Insightful) by The Mighty Buzzard on Tuesday October 23 2018, @01:55PM (6 children)
Nah. Unless you're actually trolling, a downmod is just unimpeachable confirmation that you're using your brain more effectively than whoever downmodded you. You're willing to consider a side of $discussion that sends them into a tantrum that would do a small child proud. Plus, they usually get corrected by people who prefer to use their brains rather than their hearts for thinking.
My rights don't end where your fear begins.
(Score: 3, Funny) by RS3 on Tuesday October 23 2018, @03:40PM (5 children)
Thank you, seriously. Makes perfect sense. I forget your psychologist rates and pay- hookers and blow as usual? How about some fancy lures this time?
(Score: 3, Funny) by The Mighty Buzzard on Tuesday October 23 2018, @10:31PM (4 children)
Either works. Or booze of course.
My rights don't end where your fear begins.
(Score: 2) by RS3 on Wednesday October 24 2018, @02:01AM (3 children)
Are you and ethanol-fueled one in the same?
(Score: 2) by The Mighty Buzzard on Wednesday October 24 2018, @02:13AM (2 children)
Nah, he's a Californicator and I doubt he even knows which end of a fish is supposed to bite the hook. Plus, I rarely drink to excess. If I have more than four drinks in any given month, it was a heavy drinking month for me. Now I do have those but mostly I prefer maybe a good scotch on the porch or a beer with a pizza once a week or so.
My rights don't end where your fear begins.
(Score: 2) by RS3 on Wednesday October 24 2018, @03:14AM (1 child)
A reasonably healthy respect for that important grey matter.
The few times I've fished I've caught a turtle and a tire. I released the turtle.
(Score: 3, Funny) by The Mighty Buzzard on Wednesday October 24 2018, @01:27PM
Sensible. Tires aren't usually free like that.
My rights don't end where your fear begins.
(Score: 2, Flamebait) by Runaway1956 on Tuesday October 23 2018, @02:06PM (3 children)
Don't sweat the mods, guys. There are a few of us who flap our gums, just to keep things interesting. We regularly get downmodded. It's no big thing. I recently trolled a thread where I was downmodded at LEAST ten times - probably more. But, since things are so partisan around here, I was also upmodded. Unless you're a dedicated troll, with serious troll skillz, you'll probably never see your karma below 45 or so. The only two people that I know for sure who have accomplished extremely low karma are Aristarchus, and Ethanol.
If you take karma seriously, and you see yourself sink below 40, then it's time to back off the trolling for awhile. Since I don't really care a lot, it would be fun to flirt with the low 20's - but I've never been there.
I also upmod posts sometimes made by AC's and members alike, because I think they've been unfairly modded. Others do the same, as evidenced by the AC post above.
(Score: 4, Interesting) by RS3 on Tuesday October 23 2018, @03:44PM (2 children)
Thank you so much. I'm going through a very difficult situation so I'm a bit on edge.
I'm a pretty curious open-minded person, so I enjoy people's views, even if they differ from mine at the time. I like new perspectives, and you are one of the most insightful here, so thank you again. Somehow (education) this board is making us all better, and somehow we're making the world a little bit better.
Yeah, I upmod ACs too.
(Score: 2) by krishnoid on Wednesday October 24 2018, @09:22PM (1 child)
I bet you are, you sound like the kind of dum-dum doodoo-head who would like that kind of stuff.
I never went on BBS's during their heyday -- was the color of discussion more along the lines of discourse of ideas rather than a bunch of bad-faith postulates, arguments targeting presumed ad-hominem biases, or just straight-up ad-hominem attacks? I feel like I'm starting to forget now that I'm immersed in modern-day communications (or maybe it's just age).
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday October 26 2018, @11:24PM
I mostly went to them for doorgames and file downloads, so I only read the forums once or twice out of curiousity, rather than actively posting to them (I didn't have much unique or insightful to say back in those days.) Quite a bit of it was trolling, lewd comments, and most of the rest was discussion about warez or conspiracies.
Having said that, most ops were interesting to talk to, there was some fun to be had in the message queue of some games (trade wars and LORD in particular).
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday October 23 2018, @03:34PM (1 child)
when i am logged in and posting... i dont even notice being downmodded. its not like i go back and look.
usually i am so far behind that whatever i am replying to is an article at the bottom of the main page anyway. its hard to keep current.
but i can see how itd stifle discussion if everyone was downmodded. it defeats the purpose of showing whats good if everything is moderated to suck...
(Score: 2) by RS3 on Tuesday October 23 2018, @03:48PM
Thank you too, AC. The downmods sting when I don't think I wrote anything terrible, controversial, etc. For me it's about learning and improvement. The downmod reminds me of getting a bad grade on an exam or paper, but never knowing what was wrong. There's no learning in that scenario. I always tried to get my exams and see what I did right or wrong. No matter, you've all inspired me so thanks!