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Let's do the time warp again. It's just a bend in the middle of your new apple device, a little legal shuffling and lawyers laughing all night. Let's do the bendgate again. This time it's the iPad Pro with new devices being shipped pre-bent to customers. Is this Apple subtly telling their customers to get bent? Will Apple ever learn? Will we get a Bendgate the third? Tune in six months from now to find out.
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TOO BAD YOU CAN'T BUY a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin
real fast and freak everybody out.
-- Jack Handey, The New Mexican, 1988.
(Score: 5, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday December 29 2018, @07:42PM (8 children)
It's taken me a while, but I've come to terms with the fact that I'm no longer in Apple's target market. I like wired headphones. I don't need a phone the size of my head. I don't think a tablet is a computer. I don't want my phone to scan my face. I don't even really want my computer glued to the back of a monitor (at least our royal masters at Apple threw us peasants a bone and updated the mac mini). A glossy-screened monitor at that.
I don't know who Apple is trying to sell their products to, but it isn't me anymore. Oh well, I guess Google will soon be tracking my every movement, from the bedroom to the kitchen and back (the joys of being a shut-in), as soon as my current iPhone dies. Apple won't miss me, and I won't miss them either.
(Score: 5, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday December 29 2018, @09:21PM (7 children)
Judging by the people I see hanging out in the Apple stores in my area lately, the apple advertisements, and general apple promotional material, I am certainly not in Apple's target demographic anymore either because:
-I'm white
-I'm male
-I'm straight
-I'm old enough to remember when Arnold was just a bodybuilder.
-I have no beard or a mini-Mohawk
-I do not dye my hair red, green, pink, orange, or blue.
-I do not have any neck-to-finger or neck-to-toe tattoos
-I am not hideously overweight
-I like USB-A ports
-I hate dongles
-I like function keys
-I like using my own batteries in my mouse
-I like a keyboard that doesn't feel like I'm typing on a sponge
-I don't think I should have to break apart glued seals in order to change my HD or CPU.
-I don't think 5000 more emojiis is a compelling feature to upgrade my OS.
(Score: 2) by takyon on Saturday December 29 2018, @09:40PM (1 child)
USB Type-A ports are probably going to be completely phased out on most laptops within a few years. Lately I've been seeing laptops packing 2 of each kind, but you can fit more USB Type-C ports on a laptop and make the laptop thinner.
[SIG] 10/28/2017: Soylent Upgrade v14 [soylentnews.org]
(Score: 2) by acid andy on Sunday December 30 2018, @07:51PM
I don't want thinner! Thinner means more fragile, as TFA shows, unless someone wants to make the entire laptop case out of metal, which they won't because it's too expensive and heavy.
If a cat has kittens, does a rat have rittens, a bat bittens and a mat mittens?
(Score: 2) by Rosco P. Coltrane on Saturday December 29 2018, @09:55PM
Let me guess: you're an accountant.
(Score: 4, Funny) by fyngyrz on Saturday December 29 2018, @10:10PM (2 children)
Well, and there's this. [flickr.com]
--
I scream, you scream, the police come, it's awkward.
(Score: 3, Insightful) by crafoo on Saturday December 29 2018, @10:55PM
It's really quite incredible how bad that design is. But then, Apple mice have always been trash.
(Score: 2, Insightful) by fustakrakich on Saturday December 29 2018, @11:02PM
They have to be laughing their asses off. They do something so overtly insane, and people keep on buying... Fascinating...
La politica e i criminali sono la stessa cosa..
(Score: 2) by crafoo on Saturday December 29 2018, @10:58PM
here's two you could add to the list:
- nearly permanent, humorless, mouth-breathing grin
- 0% muscle mass and malnourishment from the latest socially and ecologically conscious diet