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Boeing Readies "Astronaut" for Likely October Test Launch

posted by takyon on Tuesday September 03 2019, @11:50AM   Printer-friendly
from the one-'naut,-well-done dept.

upstart writes:

Submitted via IRC for Bytram

Boeing readies 'astronaut' for likely October test launch

Earlier this week, Boeing welcomed its newest astronaut to the Starliner team. Unlike other crew members, he doesn't have advanced degrees in aerospace or much experience at all. In fact, he's pretty dumb.

Meet the Boeing Starliner's anthropometric test device, also known as a crash-test dummy. Its name and gender have not yet been revealed, but a group of engineers and technicians suited up the dummy, which will fly on the inaugural flight of the Starliner spacecraft now slated to launch late September or early October from Cape Canaveral Air Force Station.

It took a team of five people to wrestle the rigid plastic dummy into the space suit. Melanie Weber, a Starliner design engineer, joked: "It's like trying to get a bride in a wedding dress when's she's gained 10 pounds."

The procedure brings Boeing one step closer to launching humans to orbit, something that hasn't happened from U.S. soil since the end of the shuttle program in 2011.

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  • (Score: 5, Interesting) by choose another one on Tuesday September 03 2019, @01:39PM (7 children)

    by choose another one (515) Subscriber Badge on Tuesday September 03 2019, @01:39PM (#889184)

    SpaceX already launched and retrieved "Ripley", so the US is already this close, and SpaceX didn't seem to have the same problems getting he/she/it suited up.

    Note that I am not clear if Ripley is still around or if they are still scraping bits of it off the test site after the static fire "anomaly", but that score is even too because Boeing already had a hydrazine "anomaly" with Starliner, June 2018 I think?, it's just that one isn't as widely known because we didn't get to see it go bang all over the internet...

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  • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday September 03 2019, @02:08PM (4 children)

    by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday September 03 2019, @02:08PM (#889189)

    Not sure why they need the dummy, but for all their issues, actually launching seems good.

    • (Score: 4, Touché) by DannyB on Tuesday September 03 2019, @04:48PM (3 children)

      by DannyB (5839) Subscriber Badge on Tuesday September 03 2019, @04:48PM (#889224) Journal

      Maybe the dummy is the closest equivalent to a human and thus maybe best way to gather data on forces, air pressure, bad ground crew jokes, etc.

      --
      To transfer files: right-click on file, pick Copy. Unplug mouse, plug mouse into other computer. Right-click, paste.

      • (Score: 3, Funny) by DeathMonkey on Tuesday September 03 2019, @07:17PM (2 children)

        by DeathMonkey (1380) on Tuesday September 03 2019, @07:17PM (#889260) Journal

        He was the only person they could find who was still willing to fly Boeing?

        • (Score: 2) by c0lo on Tuesday September 03 2019, @09:49PM (1 child)

          by c0lo (156) Subscriber Badge on Tuesday September 03 2019, @09:49PM (#889302) Journal

          There's still some doubt on the willingness aspect, given it took a team to wrestle it in that space suit

          --
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford

  • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday September 03 2019, @10:53PM (1 child)

    by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday September 03 2019, @10:53PM (#889312)

    Yeah but Musky incel cuddle puddle couch. The Chads in charge of Boeing would never engage in sexual harassment [eeoc.gov]. Musky dorks are a menace to women!

    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday September 03 2019, @11:14PM

      by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday September 03 2019, @11:14PM (#889316)

      The virgin hotboxed [fortune.com] clunker vs. the chad pussy-grabbing chariot.