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posted by martyb on Wednesday February 26 2020, @01:33AM   Printer-friendly
from the a-sucker-born-every-minute dept.

Car & Driver and other outlets report on the latest customization available (for a price) when you order a Porsche, https://www.caranddriver.com/news/a31082234/porsche-911-fingerprint-paint-customized/

Porsche Exclusive Manufaktur will print the design on the hood after the 911's production is completed. The hood is removed, the biometric data [from your fingerprint] is processed so that it can't be used illegally, and then a robot paints on the design. Finally, a clear coat is applied, and the hood is polished with a high-gloss finish.

The photos show the fingerprint enlarged to cover roughly half the area of the front hood.

The Autoextremist (where I saw this first) has his own personal take on just how ridiculous this is, http://www.autoextremist.com/current/2020/2/25/another-egregious-exercise-in-egomaniacal-stupidity-brought.html

Porsche is so proud of this development, that the press release goes on and on and on about it, with this gem from Alexander Fabig, Vice President, Individualization and Classic: “Individuality is very important for Porsche customers. And no design can be more personal than your own fingerprint.”

Somehow this reminds me of the old Johnny Carson bit when he said, “I did not know that.”

[...] I feel a nightmare coming on.

I suppose for the now unfortunately stereotypical buyer of a Porsche – you know, the ones who think they should drive a Porsche but can’t for the life of them really tell you why – this new level of self-aggrandizement will be embraced with a fervor akin to getting the best table at the latest “hot” restaurant of the moment. But for the rest of us it’s just another example of Porsche underpinning its very existence by catering to everything but its heritage.

I pity the first fool – I mean the first Porsche buyer sucked in by this unmitigated bullshit – because by actually appearing in public with their fingerprint on the front of their 911, he or she will instantly shout to the world that they’re The Biggest Tool in the Shed, hands-down.

Other designs will be available using the same custom printing process. Your AC submitter is waiting for the first Porsche sporting the Firebird hood decal*... Vinyl reproductions are readily available on the web (under USD$100) but if you want it painted on at Porsche, note that the fingerprint costs about $8000.

* For a couple of hood pics of actual Pontiac Firebird hood graphics, try http://transamcountry.com/community/index.php?topic=48824.0 (page down)


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  • (Score: 2) by Gaaark on Wednesday February 26 2020, @01:36AM (6 children)

    by Gaaark (41) on Wednesday February 26 2020, @01:36AM (#962639) Journal

    No!

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  • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 26 2020, @01:41AM

    by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 26 2020, @01:41AM (#962644)

    Firebird Trans-AM decal also known as Screaming Chicken --
        https://www.hagerty.com/articles-videos/articles/2019/02/19/trans-am-screaming-chicken-history [hagerty.com]

  • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 26 2020, @01:43AM (4 children)

    by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 26 2020, @01:43AM (#962648)

    To be a fly in the room during the brainstorm that led to this...

    • (Score: 1) by Ethanol-fueled on Wednesday February 26 2020, @01:56AM (2 children)

      by Ethanol-fueled (2792) on Wednesday February 26 2020, @01:56AM (#962664) Homepage

      Porsches are for the Napoleons of the business world. This fingerprint gimmick caters to that type perfectly, when a little extra vanity is needed in addition to an expensive sports car.

      You won't see Lamborghini or Ferrari pulling this kind of shit.

      • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 26 2020, @02:08AM (1 child)

        by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday February 26 2020, @02:08AM (#962671)

        It wasn't all that long ago that all Porsche 911s were air cooled, a more powerful version of the VW beetle engine...we called them all wind suckers.

        I tried that on a Porsche owner in the mid-1980s and he wasn't pleased...

        • (Score: 1) by Ethanol-fueled on Wednesday February 26 2020, @02:23AM

          by Ethanol-fueled (2792) on Wednesday February 26 2020, @02:23AM (#962683) Homepage

          Yeah the "wet pony fart" sound of those air-cooled Boxer pancakes is pretty appropriate for old beetles, not at all appropriate for anything that calls itself a "sports car."

    • (Score: 2) by MostCynical on Wednesday February 26 2020, @02:09AM

      by MostCynical (2589) on Wednesday February 26 2020, @02:09AM (#962672) Journal

      "Our service departments report having to clean lots of customers' DNA off the interior and exterior of our vehicles, including fingerprints"

      "Did you say fingerprints?"

      "Well, they are the least icky thing"

      --
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