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posted by martyb on Saturday March 14 2020, @10:46PM   Printer-friendly
from the sign-me-up-for-the-next-hermit-convention dept.

Babylon Bee:

The nation's nerds woke up in a utopia this morning, one where everyone stays inside, sporting events are being canceled, and all social interaction is forbidden.

All types of nerds, from social introverts to hardcore PC gamers, welcomed the dawn of this new era, privately from their own homes.

"I have been waiting my whole life for this moment," said Ned Pendleton, 32 -- via text message, of course -- as he fired up League of Legends on his beefy gaming PC. "They told me to take up a sport and that the kids playing basketball and stuff were gonna be way more successful than us nerds who played Counter-Strike at LAN parties every weekend."

Always look on the bright side of life.

[Certainly an element of gallows humor, but it does offer a different perspective from the incessant drumbeat of gloom and doom surrounding the current SARS-CoV-2 pandemic. What "positives" have you seen? --martyb]


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  • (Score: 4, Touché) by The Mighty Buzzard on Saturday March 14 2020, @11:04PM (40 children)

    by The Mighty Buzzard (18) Subscriber Badge <themightybuzzard@proton.me> on Saturday March 14 2020, @11:04PM (#971365) Homepage Journal

    Boomers are retired, so it's not opening up any jobs and is killing off the jobs of the healthcare workers that were attending to their medical stuff.

    --
    My rights don't end where your fear begins.
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  • (Score: 0, Touché) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday March 14 2020, @11:15PM (4 children)

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday March 14 2020, @11:15PM (#971369)

    Fewer boomers means less social security expenditure, so still a win-win.

    • (Score: 2) by barbara hudson on Sunday March 15 2020, @12:53AM (2 children)

      by barbara hudson (6443) <barbara.Jane.hudson@icloud.com> on Sunday March 15 2020, @12:53AM (#971402) Journal
      That would actually mean fewer old people spending money on goods and services. So lower gdp.
      --
      SoylentNews is social media. Says so right in the slogan. Soylentnews is people, not tech.
      • (Score: 2) by Mykl on Sunday March 15 2020, @09:52PM (1 child)

        by Mykl (1112) on Sunday March 15 2020, @09:52PM (#971683)

        Nah - the money will go to their kids, who will spend up big!

        • (Score: 2) by barbara hudson on Tuesday March 17 2020, @11:07PM

          by barbara hudson (6443) <barbara.Jane.hudson@icloud.com> on Tuesday March 17 2020, @11:07PM (#972532) Journal
          What money? With old people dropping like flies, there will be an oversupply of boomer-sized houses, meaning a price crash. They'll be cheap, but nobody will have money.
          --
          SoylentNews is social media. Says so right in the slogan. Soylentnews is people, not tech.
    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @12:59AM

      by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @12:59AM (#971404)

      Yay, more money to throw at the MIC!
      What, did you think reduced expenditure meant your taxes would go down?

  • (Score: 4, Insightful) by Grishnakh on Saturday March 14 2020, @11:45PM (16 children)

    by Grishnakh (2831) on Saturday March 14 2020, @11:45PM (#971382)

    Huh? Boomers aren't all retired yet. Yeah, they're all at least in their 50s (I think that generation is supposed to start around 1962, so about 57 years old now?), but there's still plenty of working people in their late 50s and 60s. Remember, you can't draw Social Security until 65 at the very earliest I think, and you get the best benefits if you wait until 72. So there's lots of boomers still working. Trump, for instance, is definitely a Boomer and he's certainly not retired.

    However, the way this disease works, it's by far hardest on older people, so Boomers will be hardest hit. Of course, they're also largely guilty of giving us a society with such a disastrously horrible healthcare system, so it does seem like just desserts.... And if it kills a lot of them off, it'll certainly have a big effect on politics in this country for a long time.

    • (Score: 5, Informative) by The Mighty Buzzard on Saturday March 14 2020, @11:56PM (5 children)

      by The Mighty Buzzard (18) Subscriber Badge <themightybuzzard@proton.me> on Saturday March 14 2020, @11:56PM (#971394) Homepage Journal

      Try 1945. Named so for the explosive birth rate after the end of WWII.

      --
      My rights don't end where your fear begins.
      • (Score: 2, Disagree) by Grishnakh on Sunday March 15 2020, @12:43AM (4 children)

        by Grishnakh (2831) on Sunday March 15 2020, @12:43AM (#971401)

        That's when the Boomer generation started. I'm talking about when it ended, which was in the 60s somewhere.

        • (Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @01:41AM (3 children)

          by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @01:41AM (#971421)

          You did say "I think that generation is supposed to start around 1962, so about 57 years old now?". It was not obvious that you were counting backwards from 1962.

          • (Score: 2) by RS3 on Sunday March 15 2020, @02:21AM (2 children)

            by RS3 (6367) on Sunday March 15 2020, @02:21AM (#971438)

            I understood him to mean the youngest age that qualified as a boomer. We all accept that a 70 year old is a "boomer", but what's the youngest? And that target got moved over the years. It originally meant people born 1945-1955.

            • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @02:37AM

              by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @02:37AM (#971443)
            • (Score: 0, Informative) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @05:53PM

              by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @05:53PM (#971632)

              Well TMB can't think critically, once he has a thought that is THE only valid opinion around. To him anyway, the rest of us sigh and move on, arguing with him is like talking to the seat back on a short yellow bus.

    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @03:42AM (5 children)

      by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @03:42AM (#971469)

      Remember, you can't draw Social Security until 65 at the very earliest I think,

      Earliest eligibility age is 62.

      and you get the best benefits if you wait until 72

      But, if you run the numbers, you then have to live until you are about 83 years old before the "better benefit" of waiting until 72 returns more total cash than starting at 62.

      Yes, the size of each check is larger, but starting at 62 you get ten years worth of smaller checks before you get that first age 72 check, and those slightly larger age 72 checks have to make up for those ten years worth of accumulated smaller check amounts.

      • (Score: 3, Insightful) by Runaway1956 on Sunday March 15 2020, @04:33AM (4 children)

        by Runaway1956 (2926) Subscriber Badge on Sunday March 15 2020, @04:33AM (#971486) Journal

        I can't think like that. My take home pay is considerably larger than SS + 401k would be if I were to retire right now. So, I keep working, which mean that both SS and 401 keep growing. If/when I retire, I'll get more money.

        Retirement is for old, worn out people who can't work. In fact, I think that's what congress was talking about when they created social security. They never really considered that people would just get lazy, and use social security to lie about doing nothing.

        My wife is talking about retirement, but hasn't decided when she's going to do so. I haven't even given it serious thought. I'll just keep on working until one of a couple things happens.

        1. the job dries up and blows away
        2. I'm sick or hurt and can't work
        3. I'm sick or hurt and working becomes more of a hassle than I can deal with (which is not precisely the same thing as #2)
        4. Maybe I reach 75 or 80 years old, which will shock hell out of me - I didn't expect to reach 30!
        5. I just drop dead

        • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @08:08PM (1 child)

          by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @08:08PM (#971671)

          I pick no. 5. How soon can you do it?

          • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @08:12PM

            by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @08:12PM (#971673)

            You only get a vote if you pray to the magic fairy in the sky. Or, one of the fairies who have been elected to public office in recent years.

        • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Monday March 16 2020, @11:54AM (1 child)

          by Anonymous Coward on Monday March 16 2020, @11:54AM (#971845)

          Point 4: Me either

          wtf happened...

    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @04:34AM

      by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @04:34AM (#971487)

      You can retire as early as age 62. You get the best benefits if you wait until age 70. You actually start to lose money if you wait until after age 70, because you get no more credits after the month you turn age 70.

    • (Score: 5, Informative) by mcgrew on Sunday March 15 2020, @10:40AM (1 child)

      by mcgrew (701) <publish@mcgrewbooks.com> on Sunday March 15 2020, @10:40AM (#971533) Homepage Journal

      Ignorance is NOT bliss, kid.

      Remember, you can't draw Social Security until 65 at the very earliest

      62, 65 for full benefits. I turned 62 and retired in 2014.

      Boomers will be hardest hit. Of course, they're also largely guilty of giving us a society with such a disastrously horrible healthcare system

      Wrong again.We boomers inherited that abysmal system. Oh, and you can thank us for cleaning up the toxic environmental mess the "Greatest Generation" left us, too. Like I told another dumb kid on Facebook, all the problems you inherited we boomers inherited and have been trying to fix all our lives.

      So have a little respect for your elders, you snotnosed kid.

      --
      mcgrewbooks.com mcgrew.info nooze.org
      • (Score: 3, Informative) by Runaway1956 on Monday March 16 2020, @01:02PM

        by Runaway1956 (2926) Subscriber Badge on Monday March 16 2020, @01:02PM (#971853) Journal

        62, 65 for full benefits.

        My wife is sixteen months older than I am. We've both been getting statements from SS for years now. Her statement does not look like my statement. She can retire at 63 (too late now) or she can retire at 65 for "full benefits".

        I can retire at 63 for "early retirement", or 65, or wait until 72 for "full benefits".

        That stuff is all being grandfathered into a new plan. Apparently, the goal is less to reduce benefits, than to A: make you work longer for those benefits, and B: maybe reduce the number of people who survive to draw those benefits.

    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @08:49PM

      by Anonymous Coward on Sunday March 15 2020, @08:49PM (#971677)

      Of course, they're also largely guilty of giving us a society with such a disastrously horrible healthcare system

      Neither Nixon or Ted Kennedy [wikipedia.org] were boomers.

  • (Score: 2) by JoeMerchant on Sunday March 15 2020, @02:58AM (17 children)

    by JoeMerchant (3937) on Sunday March 15 2020, @02:58AM (#971448)

    I think we're missing the point, this would be the Trump plan to fix Medicare: just make sure nobody lives past 65 and the whole thing is solvent again!

    --
    🌻🌻 [google.com]
    • (Score: 1) by khallow on Sunday March 15 2020, @03:41AM (8 children)

      by khallow (3766) Subscriber Badge on Sunday March 15 2020, @03:41AM (#971468) Journal
      Let us note that probably was the original plan for solvency, plus having lots of kids.
      • (Score: 2) by The Mighty Buzzard on Sunday March 15 2020, @10:27AM (7 children)

        It most definitely was part of the plan. The life expectancy was considerably shorter back then. You can't run a successful Ponzi Scheme if everyone is able to get their money back eventually.

        --
        My rights don't end where your fear begins.
        • (Score: 3, Insightful) by JoeMerchant on Sunday March 15 2020, @12:36PM (6 children)

          by JoeMerchant (3937) on Sunday March 15 2020, @12:36PM (#971543)

          Hey kids: I bet you didn't know your were born to fill in the bottom of a pyramid scheme!

          --
          🌻🌻 [google.com]
          • (Score: 1) by khallow on Sunday March 15 2020, @02:32PM (5 children)

            by khallow (3766) Subscriber Badge on Sunday March 15 2020, @02:32PM (#971566) Journal
            The learning about it is the fun!

            Having said that, I first learned about the Social Security/Medicare problem in the late 1980s from a discarded book, with a photo of colored matchsticks displayed in some of US flag-colored pattern (US outline or flag, I don't recall) caught in the act of burning away. The book exaggerated the situation somewhat, but was still a remarkable bit of prognostication. 30 years later, here we are going through the start of the problems that book detailed.

            I also find it remarkable how some of the more vocal defenders here will take the brunt of the fallout from these pyramid schemes' failures. It's like it's karma.
            • (Score: 2) by JoeMerchant on Sunday March 15 2020, @03:16PM (4 children)

              by JoeMerchant (3937) on Sunday March 15 2020, @03:16PM (#971571)

              Like Malthus, anybody can do the math and see the looming problem - predicting the date that the market stampedes off the cliff irretrievably is the trick.

              --
              🌻🌻 [google.com]
              • (Score: 1) by khallow on Sunday March 15 2020, @03:50PM (3 children)

                by khallow (3766) Subscriber Badge on Sunday March 15 2020, @03:50PM (#971580) Journal

                predicting the date that the market stampedes off the cliff irretrievably is the trick.

                It's not the market that will stampede here. My guess is someone with a perfect haircut, white teeth, and a truckload of empty promises will do the job all under the guise of protecting those programs - printing money to cover obligations they can't dodge, killing elderly patients through neglect to lower demand, taxing more, and of course, forcing as many people as they can off that cliff for that greater good.

                • (Score: 2) by JoeMerchant on Sunday March 15 2020, @04:09PM (2 children)

                  by JoeMerchant (3937) on Sunday March 15 2020, @04:09PM (#971589)

                  The system is global, some countries have limited impact, but the major players in the major markets have more impact on the success and failure of government programs than anything the lawmakers can do. The biggest player of all is consumer sentiment - if too many consumers all pucker up and start hoarding toilet paper, there's no stopping the inevitable messy results - and consumer sentiment affects far more than toiletries.

                  --
                  🌻🌻 [google.com]
                  • (Score: 1) by khallow on Sunday March 15 2020, @06:30PM (1 child)

                    by khallow (3766) Subscriber Badge on Sunday March 15 2020, @06:30PM (#971640) Journal

                    but the major players in the major markets have more impact on the success and failure of government programs than anything the lawmakers can do. The biggest player of all is consumer sentiment - if too many consumers all pucker up and start hoarding toilet paper, there's no stopping the inevitable messy results

                    That's pretty flimsy even for toilet paper. The messy results are negated by private parties making more toilet paper and consumers eventually running out of places to put all that toilet paper. Consumer sentiment doesn't have anything to do with programs like Social Security or Medicare which are demand controlled - you get what you get. OTOH, if you're saying that there are unintended consequences from "major players" due to monkeying around with these huge programs? Well, me too!

                    • (Score: 3, Interesting) by JoeMerchant on Sunday March 15 2020, @06:44PM

                      by JoeMerchant (3937) on Sunday March 15 2020, @06:44PM (#971644)

                      The messy results are negated by private parties making more toilet paper

                      But, does this happen before the shit hits the fan? Not for the majority of consumers who seem likely to run out before restocking happens. In slightly more serious areas: acquaintances of ours work in the prison system, they use face masks year round for protection against various things various inmates are infected with - guess who just ran 100% out of facemasks this morning?

                      Consumer sentiment doesn't have anything to do with programs like Social Security or Medicare

                      Various forms of consumer sentiment determine the majority of the federal tax income stream. Did Clinton "balance the budget"? That brief, apparently accidental, budget balancing was mostly a result of how the economy was running - including an opening of investor wallets on an unprecedented scale, in combination with a lack of Republican trashing of the federal budget for a few years. It's all tied together.

                      --
                      🌻🌻 [google.com]
    • (Score: 2) by DannyB on Monday March 16 2020, @03:23PM (7 children)

      by DannyB (5839) Subscriber Badge on Monday March 16 2020, @03:23PM (#971909) Journal

      Trump plan to fix Medicare: just make sure nobody lives past 65

      Two problems:

      1. Allowing people to live past 30 may not be a sustainable use of planetary resources.

      2. People aged 65 don't make good runners.

      --
      People today are educated enough to repeat what they are taught but not to question what they are taught.
      • (Score: 2) by JoeMerchant on Monday March 16 2020, @04:06PM (6 children)

        by JoeMerchant (3937) on Monday March 16 2020, @04:06PM (#971925)

        Have you watched Logan, recently? It's classically corny.

        --
        🌻🌻 [google.com]
        • (Score: 2) by DannyB on Monday March 16 2020, @07:00PM (5 children)

          by DannyB (5839) Subscriber Badge on Monday March 16 2020, @07:00PM (#971969) Journal

          Actually, yes. I watched it sometime last year. I watched a couple times. I only got to see it once in my teenage years, and maybe again in college. So I definitely wanted a refresh. I've also learned that things that formed an impression in one's youth are worth re-watching or for books re-reading in one's older years. Sometimes a different perspective that comes with age.

          As for corny, yes. But so is a lot of sci fi from the 60s and 70s. Nevermind martian bugs from the 50's.

          A thought about Logan's run. If someone can no longer be part of the society after age 30, what would be wrong if they want to live but go outside the domed city and try to make a life on their own. But they wouldn't be "on their own" for long, as others would join them. But it would be a society of "old" people in their 30's and older. If those "old" people could continue to procreate, then I wonder just how soon their population would overwhelm the "utopian" city of domes? And if they procreate, they're not all going to be over 30 anymore. Within less than twenty more years you're going to have more births from younger fitter people. Maybe the city's founders realized and feared this.

          --
          People today are educated enough to repeat what they are taught but not to question what they are taught.
          • (Score: 2) by JoeMerchant on Monday March 16 2020, @07:38PM (4 children)

            by JoeMerchant (3937) on Monday March 16 2020, @07:38PM (#971982)

            If I were a city founder, I might be inclined to reduce the number of people who might piss in my water supply - among other things. Modern day New York City is incredibly dependent on natural resources from nearby rural New York - especially drinking water.

            Back then, "never trust anyone over 30" was still a saying you'd hear once in a while - my father had a bit of a crisis as his 30th birthday approached.

            As for corny, if you want to make Logan's Run look high tech, watch "Journey to the Center of the Earth" (original, of course) again...

            --
            🌻🌻 [google.com]
            • (Score: 2) by DannyB on Tuesday March 17 2020, @01:49PM (3 children)

              by DannyB (5839) Subscriber Badge on Tuesday March 17 2020, @01:49PM (#972192) Journal

              If you really want that type of bad Sci Fi, watch The Core. I almost didn't make it through that movie. Some movies just make it impossible to suspend disbelief.

              --
              People today are educated enough to repeat what they are taught but not to question what they are taught.
              • (Score: 2) by JoeMerchant on Tuesday March 17 2020, @02:54PM (2 children)

                by JoeMerchant (3937) on Tuesday March 17 2020, @02:54PM (#972238)

                The Core led me to rewatch Journey... they're both slightly farther out on the request for suspension of disbelief than Buckaroo Banzai and his trips through solid matter.

                --
                🌻🌻 [google.com]
                • (Score: 2) by DannyB on Tuesday March 17 2020, @03:30PM (1 child)

                  by DannyB (5839) Subscriber Badge on Tuesday March 17 2020, @03:30PM (#972267) Journal

                  (groan) I remember when my wife made me watch Buckaroo Banzai.

                  Then there came a time when Geordi on ST:TNG mentioned "oscillation over thruster" in some bit of "treknobabble".

                  --
                  People today are educated enough to repeat what they are taught but not to question what they are taught.
                  • (Score: 2) by JoeMerchant on Tuesday March 17 2020, @07:47PM

                    by JoeMerchant (3937) on Tuesday March 17 2020, @07:47PM (#972434)

                    Buckaroo Banzai is the fore-runner/basis of so much: the Back to the Future flux capacitor, obviously... Ready Player One calls it out directly, I forget all the references but there are literally dozens.

                    --
                    🌻🌻 [google.com]