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Anthony D'Ambrosio writes at USA Today that marriage seems like a pretty simple concept — fall in love and share your life together. Our great-grandparents did it, our grandparents followed suit, and for many of us, our parents did it as well. So why is marriage so difficult for the millennial generation?
"You want to know why your grandmother and grandfather just celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary? Because they weren't scrolling through Instagram worrying about what John ate for dinner. They weren't on Facebook criticizing others. They weren't on vacation sending Snapchats to their friends." According to D'Ambrosio, we've developed relationships with things, not each other. "Ninety-five percent of the personal conversations you have on a daily basis occur through some type of technology. We've removed human emotion from our relationships, and we've replaced it colorful bubbles," writes D'Ambrosio. "We've forgotten how to communicate yet expect healthy marriages. How is it possible to grow and mature together if we barely speak?"
D'Ambrosio writes that another factor is that our desire for attention outweighs our desire to be loved and that social media has given everyone an opportunity to be famous. "Attention you couldn't dream of getting unless you were celebrity is now a selfie away. Post a picture, and thousands of strangers will like it. Wear less clothing, and guess what? More likes," writes D'Ambrosio.
"If you want to love someone, stop seeking attention from everyone because you'll never be satisfied with the attention from one person." Finally D'Ambrosio says the loss of privacy has contributed to the demise of marriage. "We've invited strangers into our homes and brought them on dates with us. We've shown them our wardrobe, drove with them in our cars, and we even showed them our bathing suits," writes D'Ambrosio. "The world we live in today has put roadblocks in the way of getting there and living a happy life with someone. Some things are in our control, and unfortunately, others are not."
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday April 11 2015, @08:15PM
Professional marketing relies heavily on measurements of behavior changes that result from attempts to insert ideas into to other people's thoughts. A huge industry has and acts on much data that strongly correlates thoughts and actions, conscious and not. :)
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday April 11 2015, @08:22PM
There is a difference between advertisements designed to mislead and clear fantasy (video games, porn, etc.).
But I don't buy that nonsense anyway. The government at one point spent loads of money on psychic detectives. Does that mean they're effective? What if--hear me out here--people are buying these products of their own volition? What if it isn't a giant brainwashing scheme, and people are personally responsible for their own actions? I see no credible scientific evidence and scientific consensus that any of this is true.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday April 11 2015, @08:50PM
I know you'll think this is silly or worse. I still respect you and hope you'll not be angry that I say why I think as I do, as you have in part. Equal privileges. :)
I have learned by experience (good & bad) that God is our Father, knows us individually better than we know ourselves, and wants us to be happy, therefore gives us (learning experiences and) commandments that are something like guardrails or painted lines on the highway. He lets us choose for ourselves (which might illustrate why religions often teach against addictive things, because they reduce our abilities to choose for ourselves). We can ignore His guidance, but then we can't receive the good things (blessings, avoidance of pitfalls, joy...) that will come to us by following them. I have proved this for myself, by repeatable testing, which anyone can do. Perhaps this is the wrong forum for more details, but there it is and you can find more if you honestly look. All the best to you.
(Score: 1) by lcall on Saturday April 11 2015, @08:53PM
sorry, forgot to log in when posting the immediate parent
(Score: 1) by Azuma Hazuki on Saturday April 11 2015, @11:43PM
Just to clarify here, are we talking about the same God that ordered his people to commit genocide, slaughter every single man woman and child *except* the virgin girls, and keep said virgins for themselves as sex slaves? Numbers 31, for reference. I don't think we should be taking relationship advice from this guy...
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 1) by lcall on Sunday April 12 2015, @02:53PM
Since you ask: Yes: the same one.
I don't claim to know why about everything; some things we will understand better later. But I know these things (again, by the repeatable testing I mentioned earlier): He is real, what we do matters, He gives us commandments for our happiness, sin is knowing disobedience of those, He has said repeatedly that when the wicked reach a fullness they will be destroyed (like sodom & gomorrah, and maybe those others you mentioned but I don't know), and that we all will be judged and receive reward or punishment based on our choices, desires, thoughts, and intents.
One way that might help visualize this is that in the life after mortality we will understand and know each other very well. Those who have freely chosen to be honest & helpful etc to others, won't have to associate with those whose desire is to deceive, hurt, or compel. He said no unclean thing can enter His presence, and sin makes us spiritually unclean (which I visualize as meaning untrustworthy but that's just my view), until we repent and are cleansed by: faith in His Son's reconciling (aka atoning) payment that He made on our behalf (faith ~= confidence enough to act on a true principle, != believing anything someone makes up), repentance (~= regret, admit & change bad behavior, compensate where possible), baptism & the gift of the Holy Ghost by proper authority (a legal act of becoming a new person in some ways: cleansing, spiritual healing/renewal, personal guide for life...), and following His path thereafter. I say from experience: it is real, powerful, healing, life-changing.
But everyone may choose for themselves what to believe and how to live; we just can't choose the results since those follow set laws. Like someone said, you might be indignant about or disagree with the law of gravity but that doesn't give immunity from the results of jumping off a cliff; it's (eventually) the same with all true eternal laws. In my own crass way I see it as: not only can family ties persist, but trust matters, even after this short mortal time.
(Score: 1) by Azuma Hazuki on Sunday April 12 2015, @06:48PM
So this is the guy who sacrificed his own son, who is also himself, TO himself, to STOP himself from throwing his own freely-formed creations into the Hell he also chose to create (but never mentioned to the Jews; no, he let the pagan Greeks and Persians do that...) for the sins he knew they would commit with his omniscience before he created them, using the free will he freely chose to give them. And it mostly. Doesn't. Work.
This is leaving aside the fact that human free will CANNOT exist in the face of a God which is omniscient, eternal, time-transcendent, and absolutely sovereign.
Oh, and all this started because a woman cloned from the rib of a man (who somehow doesn't have a Y chromosome...) ate a piece of fruit from the tree your God DELIBERATELY PLACED SMACK-DAB CENTER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING GARDEN because the talking, four-legged snake he ALSO put in the garden, knowing what it would do--omniscient, remember-!-told her to eat it!
Do you people ever actually stop and think about the very basis of your religion?! I'm no atheist, but for damn sure I could never be any sort of Abrahamic believer. This guy Yahweh is the literal Platonic Ideal of the abusive father! "Why do you make he hit you?!" he screams as he tortures his creations for doing what he knew they'd do before he created them!
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 1) by lcall on Monday April 13 2015, @01:28PM
You sound angry; that's unfortunate. Mormons don't adopt the creeds that came after the apostles died; for example, we believe that the Father and Son are separate individuals who are one in purpose (harmonious, agreeing, acting unitedly...). Jews did believe in our Father's punishment for sin: perhaps one can sometimes view those punishments simply as natural consequences (like gravity that I mentioned). He is not a God of chaos but of order, and that requires law, and a distinction between reward & punishment for behavior.
Regarding free will: we believe it is fundamental to the overall plan he gave us; he might know what we're going to do, knowing us perfectly, but doesn't force our choices. There are many teachings and accounts that emphasize our ability to choose, from the beginning. Usually one who has raised children can understand that He would know what we're going to do before we do it, which is not the same as compulsion, because those parents have experienced it themselves.
Some things in the Old Testament are symbolic, and the tree itself might be; there are good reasons and understanding available if one tries to understand instead of making a caricature of it. We don't believe in "original sin" the way others do, but that it was a (necessary, even admirable) free choice, which allowed birth and death to enter the world, so that we could all come here and gain physical bodies and experience opposition (good vs bad, happiness vs misery), for our growth and education. It has much to do with our agency (freedom to choose). (And certainly the Old Testament's depiction of the creation is not intended to explain in scientific terms how it was done, but that it was done.)
The Book of Mormon is a companion to the Bible, words of ancient prophets from a different continent, that clarifies and reaffirms the Bible's teachings. What you have described is not what we believe, but might be what you've heard from mockers, and I'm sorry you're upset. I know for myself, regardless of what anyone says, that God is a loving Father who wants what is good for us, gives us opportunity to choose, and lets us experience results of our choices. In fact, the Book of Mormon itself contains a promise by which anyone can test and find out for themselves if it is true or not.
Though you might disagree strongly, perhaps you can now view these beliefs a little more accurately by getting it more directly instead of from mockers. I invite you to learn from the original source in the future; there's plenty of information freely available, q&a resources, etc.
I do wish you all the best.
(Score: 2) by Anal Pumpernickel on Monday April 13 2015, @02:59PM
(again, by the repeatable testing I mentioned earlier)
Maybe you should show us your science. But I doubt that's what you mean by "repeatable testing" in the first place.
He is real, what we do matters, He gives us commandments for our happiness, sin is knowing disobedience of those, He has said repeatedly that when the wicked reach a fullness they will be destroyed (like sodom & gomorrah, and maybe those others you mentioned but I don't know), and that we all will be judged and receive reward or punishment based on our choices, desires, thoughts, and intents.
Through repeatable testing, I know that the flying spaghetti monster exists.
Do you even realize how many people claim to just "know" their god exists, and how many different gods people do this with? I guess every god that people have thought up exists.
(Score: 1) by lcall on Monday April 13 2015, @04:46PM
Your intent seems to be to belittle, more than it is to understand someone else (unless I'm mistaken). That won't help you find the happiness that lasts.
But to answer you, I'll say it is through a number of things, including but not limited to repeated experiences, that in the order of ~15 million others in almost every country have also had. And you can find out more if you look, and if your intent is truly humble, sincere, and willing to act upon what you learn; in that case you can seek, learn, and prove it for your own benefit (could start at mormon.org, like reading, thinking, asking questions in the chat etc).
But I can't prove it for you, it's an individual effort, and there are conditions to be met, as with any experiment. Many people are not willing to try it while also meeting the conditions.
But I know for myself, well enough for now, and it has given me lasting peace and direction through very hard times, and hope for eternal life. Like, right now I'm too sick to work, and it's longtime intermittent. It really stinks and I could be angry, but when I remember what I know, I know it's temporary, I can get through it, there are other compensating factors, things will work out eventually, and life as a whole is really very good. None of us knows everything, but I will keep doing what I can, as I learn & move forward. We all can do the same, but some things help and others don't. :)
Best wishes.
(ps: it's much more personally rewarding to build and serve, than to mock & tear down: anyone can do that, and you're capable of much better.)
(Score: 2) by Anal Pumpernickel on Monday April 13 2015, @05:32PM
But to answer you, I'll say it is through a number of things, including but not limited to repeated experiences
Lots of people claim that they have repeated experiences that prove a different god than the one you worship exists. What do you say to them?
But I can't prove it for you, it's an individual effort, and there are conditions to be met, as with any experiment. Many people are not willing to try it while also meeting the conditions.
I'd rather there be a scientific experiment; that's the best way to get to the actual truth.
(Score: 1) by lcall on Monday April 13 2015, @05:35PM
I'd say many systems have some truth and that's a good thing, especially when one seeks continued increase in the truth they obtain. And to each their own; ultimately it's between the individual and their Maker, not up to me to say.
(Score: 1) by lcall on Monday April 13 2015, @06:06PM
Debates on what "scientific" can mean have probably already been exhaustive, elsewhere. I read years ago from an elderly philosophy professor that he could now prove that scientific "truth" is merely consensus. That resonates with me because of what I see (even the meaning of words in our human language are defined inductively), and because scientific "truth" sometimes changes with time, as we learn more. I have a great respect for science as a means of learning and for the vast value it has for us all. Science and true religion, as we have them now, usually specialize in different things, and all truth (ultimately) is self-consistent. When science & my beliefs seem to disagree, I've learned to wait a while, that there is always more to learn. And you might be surprised at how relatively infrequently they seem to disagree, when you get to the heart of it.
So to anyone I'd also say: "Keep all the truths you have, and let us see if we can add to it."
(Score: 1) by lcall on Monday April 13 2015, @06:11PM
This makes learning open and exciting in every subject, because one doesn't have to compartmentalize, since the pieces generally fit together, and in the end all of them will. It's great.
(Score: 2) by Anal Pumpernickel on Monday April 13 2015, @06:32PM
I read years ago from an elderly philosophy professor that he could now prove that scientific "truth" is merely consensus.
With consensus being reached because of massive amounts of evidence pointing towards a certain conclusion. No such evidence for gods.
(Score: 1) by lcall on Tuesday April 14 2015, @11:58AM
To me, there are mountains of evidence, but you have to be willing to look. Each can decide what to consider; that choice is part of the purpose of life. I invite you to read the Book of Mormon sincerely, gather information from the source, and test it for yourself.
(Score: 2) by Anal Pumpernickel on Tuesday April 14 2015, @03:26PM
And to many other theists, there are mountains of evidence that prove the existence of gods other than your own; they're just as certain as you, and they also have no actual scientific evidence. What do you say to them?
(Score: 1) by Azuma Hazuki on Tuesday April 14 2015, @04:11PM
LCall, you completely missed my point here.
I notice most of you people don't really understand the implications of your beliefs. Omniscience alone might not negate human free will, but your God's particular combination of omniscience, spacetime/causality-transcendence, and absolute sovereignty does. You can't just ignore this and move on; this combination of attributes makes it impossible for any being other than Yahweh to have free will.
Furthermore, your assertion that X Y and Z had to happen in order to produce growth, learning, etc., in humanity is also bunk. Your God is omnipotent. If he wants a thing, he need only will it, and it is so. An omnipotent being does not do things by "ways and means." If he wants us to have certain knowledge, he need only will it, and it is so; we have the knowledge.
So many of you people make so much noise about omni-this and absolutely-that, but at the end of the day your God is a big beardy mega-human with ego issues.
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 1) by lcall on Tuesday April 14 2015, @04:46PM
To Anal Pumpernickel: i already answered that, maybe twice.
To the immediate parent: This mortality is part 2 of a 3-act play: we existed as individual spirits before mortal birth, and we will exist as ourselves after this life, with the same character & desires unless we choose change them. The reason He doesn't control us is that His work and glory is our continued advancement, to immortality and eternal life through exercise of free will, i.e., his purposes are our growth, as independent agents, which can't happen if everything is forced. He wants us to grow up, develop, and become more capable, as a loving Father would. So he makes or allows many things to be available to us, and the choices and consequences (unless we repent) are ours.
(Side note: this distinction is also a key difference between full Christianity-style sharing of goods as found in the New Testament, versus communism as observed: complete freedom to be in or out, vs. force and control.)
This will all forever appear to you as foolishness until you look, as described earlier. Nothing I say will matter, no matter how well I answer or how logically complete, or how many evidences I tried to list, nothing: unless you sincerely desire to look, and look.
(Score: 1) by lcall on Tuesday April 14 2015, @04:55PM
ps: While we say omnipotent, He has also said He is bound as we are by eternal law. Freedom and power come by applying those laws perfectly. I strongly think that physics is included in that, but His understanding of course far exceeds ours in everything; we are rather infantile by comparison (but it's still worth the effort to move forward), and with His help and allowance, we have and will. Our physical bodies are made in His image--ie when we see Him again He will not be a stranger, in a sense.
(Score: 1) by lcall on Tuesday April 14 2015, @05:01PM
I've provided enough info for now; it's up to you to review what I've said if you want, and there's enough there to find out all the more you want, including where to ask more questions. Best wishes.
(Score: 1) by Azuma Hazuki on Wednesday April 15 2015, @09:15PM
Once more, and pay attention this time: an omnipotent being does not do things by ways and means. Do you understand why this is so? It's because ways and means are for those who are, in whatever way, lacking in power, and MUST have certain favorable conditions in place before their goals can be met.
For an omnipotent being, all that is necessary is will. If your God is actually omnipotent, and he has a desire (this is ALSO incoherent but we'll get to that later...), he does not have to use any method or set up any particular circumstance; he needs to will that a thing be so, and lo and behold, it is so. You don't seem to comprehend what "omnipotent" actually means.
Applying this to your example, Yahweh does not need to "help" us to any pinnacle of spiritual evolution that he wants us to be at. All he has to do is think "I want my humans to be like this..." and...poof. It is so.
Does anyone following this have some insight into why it is theists seem completely, utterly incapable of understanding the implications of their beliefs?! I've always said we nonbelievers take Yahweh a lot more seriously than his partisans do...
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 1) by lcall on Thursday April 16 2015, @11:09PM
It seems you want to make the rules because it appeals to you that way. You have a logical system but you are not the omniscient one, and we must listen to the One who is, because we can make mistakes even when we are confident, logical in our own way, or whatever. It is exceedingly arrogant for mortals to claim we exclusively define truth, and the sources of truth, and if God doesn't comply with our puny thoughts, he must not exist. I don't wish to insult anyone, just to suggest that you think about it. Someday we will understand much more, but for now we are just little mortals.
God has spoken, anciently and in modern times, to prophets. We believe that his message has been consistent in the fundamentals, though policies and counsel are often specific to the time in which people live, to help them deal with the specific issues of their time. That is how he communicates His will to us: by revelation: to prophets for the world, and to individuals for themselves. There are eyewitnesses, evidences, etc., but I haven't tried to list those because, as I said before, it will seem foolish to you, until you do what I said. Given that he has spoken, it is for us to find out for ourselves, then listen, follow and benefit etc, not argue and insist He change to fit our notions.
I know He has spoken, and you can also know that for yourself, if you really do what I said earlier: sincerely desire, and look, and listen, and evaluate, and test, etc. I cannot imagine how anyone could understand this without considering sincerely and in some detail what He has said, as I described earlier. That is why the Book of Mormon is key. There are many evidences that are important to me, but that is really the important one for someone to find out what is true: read it, test it following what the last chapter says (https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/moro/10.3-5?lang=eng).
*It will forever seem nutty to you if you won't do that with real sincerity.* Or in other words, if we are interested in hearing His message, and knowing for ourselves, we have to do it the way He has said.
Even if you disagree, can you follow my meaning there? Thanks for the discussion.
(Score: 2) by Anal Pumpernickel on Tuesday April 14 2015, @06:28PM
To Anal Pumpernickel: i already answered that, maybe twice.
You've answered nothing. All you've done is make unsubstantiated assertions, just like people of other religions do. There are supposedly "mountains of evidence", yet if there truly were, scientists would love to see it.