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Which editor would win in a battle royale? (If grammar and punctuation were weapons)

Displaying poll results.
Azrael
  29% 20 votes
Janrinok
  5% 4 votes
LaminatorX
  20% 14 votes
Martyb
  4% 3 votes
Mrcoolbp
  1% 1 votes
N1
  2% 2 votes
NCommander
  23% 16 votes
Woods
  10% 7 votes
67 total votes.
[ Voting Booth | Other Polls | Back Home ]
  • Don't complain about lack of options. You've got to pick a few when you do multiple choice. Those are the breaks.
  • Feel free to suggest poll ideas if you're feeling creative. I'd strongly suggest reading the past polls first.
  • This whole thing is wildly inaccurate. Rounding errors, ballot stuffers, dynamic IPs, firewalls. If you're using these numbers to do anything important, you're insane.
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  • (Score: 3, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Friday June 27 2014, @05:09PM

    by Anonymous Coward on Friday June 27 2014, @05:09PM (#60938)

    vi, of course. Its light weight and agility would help avoid damage. Plus, it's everywhere so others would already be surrounded.

    • (Score: 3, Funny) by meisterister on Friday June 27 2014, @08:46PM

      by meisterister (949) on Friday June 27 2014, @08:46PM (#61076) Journal

      >Emacs, of course. It's awesome scripting support and featureset would deal quite a bit of damage. Plus, it's everywhere so others would already be surrounded.

      FTFY

      --
      (May or may not have been) Posted from my K6-2, Athlon XP, or Pentium I/II/III.
      • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday June 29 2014, @05:24AM

        by Anonymous Coward on Sunday June 29 2014, @05:24AM (#61523)

        i hereby smite you with gedit powahs!

        consider yourself smite :-p

        • (Score: 2) by DECbot on Monday June 30 2014, @11:00PM

          by DECbot (832) on Monday June 30 2014, @11:00PM (#62219) Journal

          nano/pico, because it is lightweight, it really is everywhere, ...
          screw it.
          I raise you 'cat', 'echo', 'grep', 'awk', and the input/output stream redirectors.

          --
          cats~$ sudo chown -R us /home/base
  • (Score: 2, Insightful) by Ethanol-fueled on Friday June 27 2014, @05:15PM

    by Ethanol-fueled (2792) on Friday June 27 2014, @05:15PM (#60940) Homepage

    That's really not a fair comparison because NCommander does way more writing than the other editors, who only edit stories and occasionally post journals/comments (if you can prove otherwise, please do and post the links).

    From a grammar and punctuation standpoint, all are equally good more or less and so I cannot pick a clear winner, However, I've noticed that NCommander misspells occasionally. I'm not sure if that's because he sucks at spelling more than the others or if his misspellings are more visible because he writes a lot more than the rest.

    Based on style and content, NCommander goes loco and starts cursing and talking shit about things Tourette's-style, [wikipedia.org] so he would be the winner from a stylistic point of view since the casual coolness of the others is a contrast.

    The real question is, which one would win in a real-life fist-fight? I want to see blood!

    • (Score: 3, Funny) by maxwell demon on Friday June 27 2014, @06:29PM

      by maxwell demon (1608) on Friday June 27 2014, @06:29PM (#60977) Journal

      I want to see blood!

      What do you think where the red colour of the site comes from? :-)

      --
      The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
      • (Score: 2) by Geotti on Saturday June 28 2014, @10:41PM

        by Geotti (1146) on Saturday June 28 2014, @10:41PM (#61422) Journal

        Red color? I have a polar bear on an ice-block and everything's blue, and you should too [soylentnews.org].

        Btw, can we get a style-switching box, or at least a way to switch modes with a link so I can switch two themes in my user-box?

    • (Score: 2) by clone141166 on Saturday June 28 2014, @01:57AM

      by clone141166 (59) on Saturday June 28 2014, @01:57AM (#61216)

      When I read the title I had a mental image of a guy running towards another guy and stabbing the tail end of a giant, life-sized comma into his stomach...

      • (Score: 2) by Tork on Saturday June 28 2014, @05:49PM

        by Tork (3914) Subscriber Badge on Saturday June 28 2014, @05:49PM (#61371)
        What a waste of a colon.
        --
        🏳️‍🌈 Proud Ally 🏳️‍🌈
      • (Score: 2) by c0lo on Sunday June 29 2014, @02:18AM

        by c0lo (156) Subscriber Badge on Sunday June 29 2014, @02:18AM (#61488) Journal

        life-sized comma into his stomach

        Dilemma: "comma induced coma" or "coma induced comma"?

        --
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
    • (Score: 2) by c0lo on Sunday June 29 2014, @02:08AM

      by c0lo (156) Subscriber Badge on Sunday June 29 2014, @02:08AM (#61487) Journal

      NCommander goes loco and starts cursing and talking shit about things Tourette's-style

      [Citation needed]

      --
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
      • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday June 29 2014, @05:26AM

        by Anonymous Coward on Sunday June 29 2014, @05:26AM (#61524)

        Pop into IRC once in a while

    • (Score: 2) by VLM on Sunday June 29 2014, @03:36PM

      by VLM (445) Subscriber Badge on Sunday June 29 2014, @03:36PM (#61651)

      Specifically and solely on the topic of "From a ... punctuation standpoint" and in the poll "If ... punctuation were weapons" one observation is Laminator's enter key must occasionally be broken. Strictly commenting solely on punctuation. Scrolling by, wall of text, oh that's laminator.

      From a military tactical strategy either that's a very heavy club or a solid defensive wall. Then again other military theories identify "big and heavy" as immobile and therefore easier to defeat. So its a tough call which would win, probably depends on the opponent, but the argument would revolve around this impenetrable wall.

  • (Score: 2) by lhsi on Friday June 27 2014, @06:19PM

    by lhsi (711) on Friday June 27 2014, @06:19PM (#60967) Journal

    I'll have to check back on some of my submissions to see which ones improved the most between me submitting it and it being posted.

    It might take some time as I have a pretty big sample size to check :-/

    • (Score: 1) by zizban on Friday June 27 2014, @08:54PM

      by zizban (3765) on Friday June 27 2014, @08:54PM (#61080)

      Your submission actually are pretty good. Most of the work we do on them is adding stuff from the TFA since the submission looks a little sparse.

      • (Score: 2) by lhsi on Friday June 27 2014, @10:09PM

        by lhsi (711) on Friday June 27 2014, @10:09PM (#61140) Journal

        I'll blame the editors for that. They do a good job of cleaning up things that I don't worry too much if what I write isn't great as it'll get fixed :-)

        Although making submissions on a phone is pretty tricky so I'd expect something to need fixing even if I tried for a perfect submission.

  • (Score: 1) by zizban on Friday June 27 2014, @08:46PM

    by zizban (3765) on Friday June 27 2014, @08:46PM (#61077)

    I'm too new to be on that list!

  • (Score: 3, Insightful) by e_armadillo on Friday June 27 2014, @09:41PM

    by e_armadillo (3695) on Friday June 27 2014, @09:41PM (#61115)

    Cowboy Neal would have them all retreating like the Knights of the Round Table from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, "Run away! Run away!" And he wouldn't even have to say "Ni"

    I may not miss the old site, but I do miss the Cowboy Neal option in the polls :-)

    --
    "How are we gonna get out of here?" ... "We'll dig our way out!" ... "No, no, dig UP stupid!"
    • (Score: 1) by richtopia on Saturday June 28 2014, @12:26AM

      by richtopia (3160) on Saturday June 28 2014, @12:26AM (#61190) Homepage Journal

      Even if it isn't Neal we do need a default dummy answer. One of the best parts of polls is when the dummy answer wins hands down.

      • (Score: 2) by Subsentient on Saturday June 28 2014, @07:20AM

        by Subsentient (1111) on Saturday June 28 2014, @07:20AM (#61284) Homepage Journal

        I propose Gerbilius: Lord of the Gerbils

        --
        "It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." -Jiddu Krishnamurti
        • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday June 29 2014, @05:31AM

          by Anonymous Coward on Sunday June 29 2014, @05:31AM (#61527)

          i propose a borg-assimilated natalie portman... with the breast enlargement implants

          she would make short work of your gerbil swarm... mwahahaha!

      • (Score: 2) by LoRdTAW on Saturday June 28 2014, @05:55PM

        by LoRdTAW (3755) on Saturday June 28 2014, @05:55PM (#61372) Journal

        I loved the old Cowboy Neil option.

        E.g.
        Would you buy a robot car?
        O Shut up and take my money.
        O Only if proven 100% safe.
        O Maybe given below posted condition were met...
        O you can pry my steering wheel from my cold dead hands.
        O Cowboy Neil already drives me everywhere.

        It was that funny catchall. I always pictured this stereotypical cowboy with an exaggerated 10 gallon hat, cowhide chaps, big leather boots and twin leather holsters w/ ivory handled revolvers doing all sorts of silly and impossible tasks.

        • (Score: 2) by c0lo on Sunday June 29 2014, @02:26AM

          by c0lo (156) Subscriber Badge on Sunday June 29 2014, @02:26AM (#61489) Journal

          I always pictured this stereotypical cowboy with an exaggerated 10 gallon hat, cowhide chaps, big leather boots and twin leather holsters w/ ivory handled revolvers doing all sorts of silly and impossible tasks.

          Ummmm... like him [memegenerator.net]?

          --
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
          • (Score: 2) by c0lo on Sunday June 29 2014, @02:29AM

            by c0lo (156) Subscriber Badge on Sunday June 29 2014, @02:29AM (#61492) Journal
            Ah, shit! This one [complex.com] would have been way better.
            --
            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
  • (Score: 2) by janrinok on Sunday June 29 2014, @12:15PM

    by janrinok (52) Subscriber Badge on Sunday June 29 2014, @12:15PM (#61604) Journal

    Whenever NCommander begins to prepare one of his epics, we each try our best to make the necessary corrections when he is not looking... Sometimes - in fact often - he can produce typos and 'spolling misteaks' quicker than we can correct them! But the content is pure NCommander and, for that, he must take all the credit.

  • (Score: 1) by azrael on Sunday June 29 2014, @11:20PM

    by azrael (2855) on Sunday June 29 2014, @11:20PM (#61738)

    I hope I got votes for my awesome editing skills and not just being at the top of the list ;)

  • (Score: 2) by q.kontinuum on Monday June 30 2014, @05:43AM

    by q.kontinuum (532) on Monday June 30 2014, @05:43AM (#61818) Journal
    Sorry for being off topic. But is there any link where someone can submit his own polls? I checked on submit [soylentnews.org] and in polls [soylentnews.org], but no luck.
    --
    Registered IRC nick on chat.soylentnews.org: qkontinuum
    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Monday June 30 2014, @04:35PM

      by Anonymous Coward on Monday June 30 2014, @04:35PM (#62014)

      Post them on the most current poll, the creator often trolls the poll comments for suggestions.