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Things you want to see hit by an asteroid
| 6% | 15 votes |
| 23% | 55 votes |
| 5% | 13 votes |
| 4% | 11 votes |
| 1% | 4 votes |
| 23% | 54 votes |
| 16% | 38 votes |
| 17% | 40 votes |
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- Don't complain about lack of options. You've got to pick a few when you do multiple choice. Those are the breaks.
- Feel free to suggest poll ideas if you're feeling creative. I'd strongly suggest reading the past polls first.
- This whole thing is wildly inaccurate. Rounding errors, ballot stuffers, dynamic IPs, firewalls. If you're using these numbers to do anything important, you're insane.
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Things you want to see hit by an asteroid
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The Fine Print: The following comments are owned by whoever posted them. We are not responsible for them in any way.
sillema sillema nika su
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday July 03 2014, @05:45PM
/poll
(Score: 2) by zocalo on Thursday July 03 2014, @06:27PM
Now, if the trampoline could also be located in Fort Meade that would be even better, of course.
UNIX? They're not even circumcised! Savages!
(Score: 2) by Woods on Thursday July 03 2014, @06:38PM
I really wanted to do NSA, but I figured "workplace" would be better for non-US voters.
(Score: 1) by Buck Feta on Thursday July 03 2014, @10:29PM
I'm pretty sure they wouldn't object to the poll option or the asteroid.
- fractious political commentary goes here -
(Score: 2) by mhajicek on Friday July 04 2014, @12:21PM
The NSA doesn't only spy on Americans you know.
The spacelike surfaces of time foliations can have a cusp at the surface of discontinuity. - P. Hajicek
(Score: 3, Funny) by maxwell demon on Sunday July 06 2014, @03:13PM
Yeah, it even spies on Americans you don't know. :-)
The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
(Score: 2) by etherscythe on Thursday July 03 2014, @07:53PM
Rather Washington DC. More effective overall. Talk about rebooting politics...
Did I read that right? If we choose "other" we're not supposed to specify what?
"Fake News: anything reported outside of my own personally chosen echo chamber"
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday July 03 2014, @08:11PM
Well when people choose "Other" they never specify anyway, so maybe this way they will!
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday July 03 2014, @06:46PM
Have we thought out this poll? How large is the asteroid? What speed is it traveling at? At what angle is it entering the atmosphere?
Any option but "Another asteroid" can therefore be considered suicidal. And even "Another asteroid" isn't far off, as two asteroids the size of the moon could collide 3 feet off the ground.
Furthermore, "asteroids" are what flies in space. Once it enters the atmosphere and is on its way to nail your mother, it becomes a meteor.
I'll wait for the "Things you'd like to hit with a pie" poll. It will make more sense.
(Score: 2) by c0lo on Thursday July 03 2014, @10:32PM
Not necessarily. You could still place the "your mother's bits" in space
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
(Score: 2) by isostatic on Friday July 04 2014, @10:30AM
I'm an asteroid miner you insensitive clod! I now have a picture of CowboyNeal, your Mother and your ex having a threesome on a Trampoline on the asteroid I work at, while being broadcast over the internet!
(Score: 2) by mhajicek on Friday July 04 2014, @12:24PM
Love the sig.
The spacelike surfaces of time foliations can have a cusp at the surface of discontinuity. - P. Hajicek
(Score: 1) by lonestar on Saturday July 05 2014, @03:23AM
Hate the sig.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday July 04 2014, @10:31AM
Which means that anything in space can be hit by an asteroid. This may be
* Your place of work, if you happen to work at the ISS.
* Another asteroid, obviously.
* Your ex, if you shoot him/her into space first.
* The internet, at least the satellite based part.
* (Insert "your mother" joke here) Your mother is so fat that she reaches out into space, where she can be hit by an asteroid.
* A giant trampoline, which would have to be put in space, obviously.
* CowboyNeal, if you shoot him into space first.
* Other - Do not specify: Of course there are other unspecified things in space.
(Score: 2) by DECbot on Thursday July 03 2014, @06:48PM
The middle east, be cause political and military options don't seem to work.
cats~$ sudo chown -R us /home/base
(Score: 1) by Ethanol-fueled on Thursday July 03 2014, @07:53PM
All of it including the 'Stans, Israel, Turkey, and North Africa. We turn the place to glass and divide the spoils of war evenly amongst Oceania, Eurasia, and EastAsia.
Then we all Rock and Roll all Nite, and party every day.
(Score: 1) by bziman on Friday July 04 2014, @02:53AM
Yeah, because they invade USA/Europe all the time! Gimme a break. You want warmongering, look in a mirror.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday July 04 2014, @10:57AM
I think you missed a 1984 reference in the parent.
(Score: 1) by Freeman on Monday July 07 2014, @09:46PM
There won't be much spoils aside from land and glass at that point.
Joshua 1:9 "Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee"
(Score: 1) by Ethanol-fueled on Thursday July 03 2014, @06:50PM
And, by the "CowboyNeal" option, did the poll writer intend that CowboyNeal should be hit by an asteroid, or that all the people suggesting that CowboyNeal should be an option here should be hit by an asteroid?
Either way, "Bacon" should be our version of the CowboyNeal option.
CowboyNeal option, meet Samson Option. [wikipedia.org]
(Score: 2) by DECbot on Thursday July 03 2014, @06:57PM
Bacon de la CowboyNeal. (The bacon IS CowboyNeal!!!)
cats~$ sudo chown -R us /home/base
(Score: 2) by bucc5062 on Monday July 07 2014, @06:24PM
I choose CowboyNeal For I wanted to see if he was as indestructible as theorized in other polls from the past. My guess, either his stout carriage or overcharged ego would destroy the object before it even hit him.
The more things change, the more they look the same
(Score: 2) by Darth Turbogeek on Tuesday July 08 2014, @12:18PM
I thought it was CowboyNeal IS the asteriod?
(Score: 2) by meisterister on Thursday July 03 2014, @09:16PM
Comcast? Time Warner? Verizon? Come on!
(May or may not have been) Posted from my K6-2, Athlon XP, or Pentium I/II/III.
(Score: 2) by tynin on Friday July 04 2014, @03:46AM
If you were free to make assumptions on what an average asteroid is, how big would a giant trampoline need to be to repel it?
(Score: 2) by Pslytely Psycho on Friday July 04 2014, @07:29AM
(Starts working on Kerbal Space Program "Giant Trampoline Mod.")
Alex Jones lawyer inspires new TV series: CSI Moron Division.
(Score: 2) by mendax on Friday July 04 2014, @07:23AM
I swear that if a small asteroid hit the US Capitol dead on while the Congress were in session, nothing would change in this country except for the curious fact that the average IQ of the people in the area living near the Beltway would probably double. The level of imbecility of the population increases as you get closer to Capitol Hill. Once there, it goes negative.
The same can be said about the California legislature except that since it's one-party rule there at the moment they actually are doing something constructive. And the governor is actually an enlightened soul.
It's really quite a simple choice: Life, Death, or Los Angeles.
(Score: 2) by WizardFusion on Friday July 04 2014, @09:30AM
Obligatory [xkcd.com]
(Score: 1) by lonestar on Saturday July 05 2014, @03:25AM
Please add Washington, DC to the poll options.
(Score: 2) by evilviper on Sunday July 06 2014, @02:08AM
1) NASA / ESA / Roscosmos
2) Poll-writer has no sense of irony.
I'd actually like to see a NASA probe LASSO a comet, with a nice spring-loaded cable. That'll fling it out to the outer solar system, getting to ~35 AU with no fuel consumption. From there, the probe can detach, and rockets can be fired to continue on the trajectory towars whatever neighboring body (eg. Alpha Centauri AB), eventually giving us our first up-close look at another solar system.
Hydrogen cyanide is a delicious and necessary part of the human diet.
(Score: 1) by Hartree on Tuesday July 08 2014, @12:53AM
"Do not specify"
You insensitive clods. You're infringing on our right to post lame drivel on your website. *sob-butthurt-pouting-I'll-tell-my-mommy-and-cowboy-neal*