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posted by martyb on Monday May 12 2014, @02:28PM   Printer-friendly [Skip to comment(s)]

For those of you in the United States, Sunday was Mother's Day. It got me thinking about my relationship with my mother and of other people's relationships with their's. I wrote this Sunday morning and it didn't make it onto SN in time. I offer it [with slight temporal modifications] as it was originally written:

I have no masterful prose to offer here. Rather, I'd like to extend an opportunity for the community to share their memorable experiences. A time when you especially felt supported or nurtured or challenged.

In my case, my Mom passed away several years ago. On Mother's Day I especially feel the loss of the exceedingly gentle and yet tough woman who sacrificed greatly so that I might have a chance at a good life. She taught me manners. To say "Please" and "Thank-you". She encouraged me to do my homework, sometimes at the threat of losing certain privileges. When I was just a few years old and puking my guts out from some illness, she sat by me gently stroking my back, encouraged me to have some flat Coca Cola and saltines to give me strength, and applied cool compresses to my forehead to help alleviate my fever. She offered perspective and gentleness when I was getting over my first childhood crush, when I failed my first try at my driver's license, and when I faced career changes in my life.

I realize that some here may have had less than wonderful moms; I have met some of you and my heart goes out to you. I hope that with time, you may be able to find peace.

For those who have had special times, I encourage you to please take some time to visit or call and make a small sacrifice for her.

Also, I ask you to put aside for a moment the black-and-white minutia of the latest gadget or OS and share a vignette of a special time you shared.

I'll close with this: "Mom, I don't know if there is a heaven, but if there is, I know you are there. I hope I've grown to be a man you are proud of; I know I wouldn't be half the man I am without you. Thanks is too little, but it is all I have to offer. I miss you."

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  • (Score: 4, Interesting) by LaminatorX on Monday May 12 2014, @02:29PM

    by LaminatorX (14) <{laminatorx} {at} {gmail.com}> on Monday May 12 2014, @02:29PM (#42119)

    My late Mother was a religion teacher at a Catholic high school. Sometime around '84-'85 or so, she asked to join in a game with my friends and I. She had no doubt encountered some of the hype and decided to check it out for herself. We were about 10 or 11 years old, and playing basic D&D (badly). But, you know, we were still just young enough that Mom joining in, while a bit weird, wasn't totally uncool, so hey, game on. We gave her a Thief that somebody had rolled up but passed on.

    So, we're at the entrance to The Keep on the Borderlands being asked our names and occupations. Everybody else was like "I am Such-and-such, the Fighter," but when it was Mom's turn to speak she said, "I am So-and-so, the leather merchant." There was a sudden shocked silence, then somebody pointed out to her that she was playing not a leather merchant but a a Thief. She responded, "Of course, but if I tell them that, they'll never let me into their castle." Another round of stunned silence passed as nodding appreciation of her subterfuge sunk in.

    Satisfied that nothing we were doing in the basement constituted a risk to our immortal souls, my Mother never played with us again after that day. Just the same, I have the Satan-scare to thank for giving our group a quantum leap forward in verisimilitude and immersion, and for the one time I got to game with Mom.

    • (Score: 2) by VLM on Monday May 12 2014, @03:03PM

      by VLM (445) Subscriber Badge on Monday May 12 2014, @03:03PM (#42133)

      "Another round of stunned silence passed as nodding appreciation of her subterfuge sunk in."

      Mom's day is hyper gendered and role played in the marketing material, but, being human like the rest of us, moms can kick butt, which is cool. Around the same era, my grandmother decided to become a "Lady Bug" (DigDug clone) expert on the Colecovision and would demolish any other player, which was highly entertaining for everyone involved. Being a mom isn't just making school lunches like the sappy TV commercials, its playing video games too.

    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Monday May 12 2014, @05:21PM

      by Anonymous Coward on Monday May 12 2014, @05:21PM (#42210)

      That's an excellent story.

    • (Score: 1) by theHazardMan on Monday May 12 2014, @05:38PM

      by theHazardMan (2588) on Monday May 12 2014, @05:38PM (#42220)

      Just a really awesome story. Thanks for sharing it.

    • (Score: 2) by Reziac on Tuesday May 13 2014, @02:56AM

      by Reziac (2489) on Tuesday May 13 2014, @02:56AM (#42509) Homepage

      Wow. Your mom was awesome!

  • (Score: 2, Insightful) by Robotron on Monday May 12 2014, @03:03PM

    by Robotron (3099) on Monday May 12 2014, @03:03PM (#42134) Homepage

    My mother accepted my explanation that I didn't believe there should be a preassigned day for her or my Dad. My love and regard for my parents is a constant thread in my life and requires no pretense of celebration or gift giving. To this day I'm certain my spontaneous giving of small gifts and appreciative words on an unfixed basis has brought more joy to all concerned.

    I don't need a prescribed occasion to remember or express how much I love either of my parents.

    • (Score: 3, Funny) by mojo chan on Monday May 12 2014, @04:44PM

      by mojo chan (266) on Monday May 12 2014, @04:44PM (#42192)

      I'll add that to my list of excuses for when I next forget too.

      --
      const int one = 65536; (Silvermoon, Texture.cs)
  • (Score: 3, Funny) by Ethanol-fueled on Monday May 12 2014, @03:32PM

    by Ethanol-fueled (2792) on Monday May 12 2014, @03:32PM (#42153) Homepage

    I did an extensive write-up about this in my journal. Click the "journal" link by my username above and read the most recent entry, or click my journal entry in the "recent journals" section of the sidebar.

    • (Score: 2) by Bytram on Monday May 12 2014, @03:54PM

      by Bytram (4043) on Monday May 12 2014, @03:54PM (#42162) Journal
      I should have given attribution; I apologize. It was in reading your journal entry that I was prompted to write and submit my own. It was cathartic and helped me deal with my feeling of loss. Thank you.
      • (Score: 2, Funny) by Ethanol-fueled on Monday May 12 2014, @06:36PM

        by Ethanol-fueled (2792) on Monday May 12 2014, @06:36PM (#42255) Homepage

        No worries, no need to apologize. In posting in this discussion I was not fishing for attribution, just participating.

        My journal wouldn't have been accepted for submission to the front page anyway, haha!

    • (Score: 2) by dotdotdot on Monday May 12 2014, @04:17PM

      by dotdotdot (858) on Monday May 12 2014, @04:17PM (#42174)
      Really, mods? How is this offtopic? Seriously, please enlighten us with your thought process.
      • (Score: 2, Insightful) by Snow on Monday May 12 2014, @04:20PM

        by Snow (1601) on Monday May 12 2014, @04:20PM (#42175) Journal

        Did you read his journal entry?
         
        Ethanol-Fueled is a troll. A great troll, and one that I enjoy having around, but still a troll.

        • (Score: 3, Informative) by dotdotdot on Monday May 12 2014, @04:32PM

          by dotdotdot (858) on Monday May 12 2014, @04:32PM (#42184)
          So here is the topic Bytram wrote:

          Rather, I'd like to extend an opportunity for the community to share their memorable experiences. A time when you especially felt supported or nurtured or challenged.

          Now just because Ethanol-fueled is a professional troll, doesn't mean everything he writes is offtopic. Here is his summary:

          Let's put on a little Mother's Day music to help segue into the sentimental. Thank you all for listening to my gratingly self-indulgent and narcissistic first-person bullshit. And think, really think, about everything I've just told you and give your Momma a hug. If you can't give Momma a hug, send her some flowers and give her a call. If you can't do either of those, say a prayer and bring some flowers to a place where you know she'll see and appreciate them. Happy Mother's Day. Thanks, Momma, for buying me all those Legos and Calvin and Hobbes books as a kid. I know they were expensive to you and Dad, but they didn't go to waste.

          Judge for yourself now, but it sure looks ontopic to me.

  • (Score: 5, Insightful) by BasilBrush on Monday May 12 2014, @05:49PM

    by BasilBrush (3994) on Monday May 12 2014, @05:49PM (#42229)

    This "story" has no place here. It's not a story and it's not about tech.

    Anyone who wants to get all sentimental about mother's day has plenty of other places to do it.

    --
    Hurrah! Quoting works now!
  • (Score: 2, Insightful) by poutine on Monday May 12 2014, @08:35PM

    by poutine (106) on Monday May 12 2014, @08:35PM (#42319)

    There's a reason this article has the lowest comments on the front page. This type of crap does not belong on tech news sites. Please don't turn SN into your personal facebook, since there's... facebook for that.

    • (Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday May 13 2014, @12:21AM

      by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday May 13 2014, @12:21AM (#42428)

      SoylentNews is people. This story is people.

      I'm sorry about your Aspergers.