from the With-great-beard-comes-great-responsibility dept.
Philosophers deal with real, empirical, questions! From Quartzy, the ethical question of male facial hair.
Those who believe growing a beard is a personal fashion choice need to reconsider. The bristly facial hair of men is, in fact, the physical embodiment of deep ethical and aesthetic considerations. Henry Pratt, philosophy professor at Marist College in Poughkeepsie, New York, wrote a detailed analysis of such philosophical conundrums in his aptly titled paper, “To Beard or Not to Beard: Ethical and Aesthetic Obligations and Facial Hair.”
Why now: well, it all goes back to the "fool says in his heart" guy, St. Anselm.
In this paper, presented at the January 2019 eastern division meeting of the American Philosophical Association in New York, Pratt considers the premise set out by Saint Anselm of Canterbury, an 11th century philosopher. Anselm writes:
Not having a beard is not dishonorable for a man who is not yet supposed to have a beard, but once he ought to have a beard, it is unbecoming for him not to have one. In the same way, not having justice is not a defect in a nature that is not obligated to have justice, but it is disgraceful for a nature that ought to have it.
The take-away:
However, one surprising consequence of my philosophical work on pogonotrophy is that I now find myself thinking that the choices made by myself and others about what to grow on our faces are actually pretty important. I find myself wondering whether I should worry about the masculinity projected by my beard, and the effects thereof. I also consider whether friends and associates should have the facial hair they grow. But just as it’s a bad idea to tell other parents they’re raising their kids wrong, I think it’s a bad idea to tell others that their beards are wrong. So far.
Other relevant sources:
The Philosophy of Beards: A Lecture Physiological, Artistic and Historical, by Thomas Gowing; 1875;
The Philosopher’s Beard
Beard Taxes!
The Gentleman Lawyer’s Guide to Facial Hair
"Law of Conservation of Facial Hair" still applies.
(Score: 3, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @02:37AM (9 children)
I'm aware some stare at my hair.
In fact, to be fair,
Some really despair of my hair.
But I don't care,
Cause they're not aware,
Nor are they devonaire.
In fact, they're just square.
They see hair down to there,
Say, "Beware" and go off on a tear!
I say, "No fair!"
A head that's bare is really nowhere.
So be like a bear, be fair with your hair!
Show it you care.
Wear it to there.
Or to there.
Or to there, if you dare!
My wife bought some hair at a fair, to use as a spare.
Did I care?
Au contraire!
Spare hair is fair!
In fact, hair can be rare.
Fred Astair got no hair,
Nor does a chair,
Nor nor a chocolate eclair,
And where is the hair on a pear?
Nowhere, mon frere!
So now that I've shared this affair of the hair,
I'm going to repair to my lair and use Nair, do you care?
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @03:00AM (2 children)
While I appreciate the effort you should mix up the rhymes every few lines...
(Score: 2) by edIII on Thursday January 24 2019, @03:23AM (1 child)
Disagree. It gave it a certain character.
Technically, lunchtime is at any moment. It's just a wave function.
(Score: 2) by aristarchus on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:52AM
Citation needed! As this is quite clearly classic George Carlin. Plagiarism, even on SoylentNews, is not cool. Now copyright violation, and the more violent the better, that is OK.
(Score: 4, Funny) by driverless on Thursday January 24 2019, @09:50AM (5 children)
“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a beard”.
(Score: 3, Funny) by AthanasiusKircher on Thursday January 24 2019, @02:30PM (4 children)
Ooh, this sounds fun -- can I try?
"It was the best of beards, it was the worst of beards, it was the beard of wisdom, it was the beard of foolishness, it was the facial hair of belief, it was the facial hair of incredulity, it was the season of Beardedness, it was the season of Beardlessness, it was the goatee of hope, it was the mutton chops of despair."
"Call me Bearded."
"Happy beards are all alike; every unhappy beard is unhappy in its own way."
"I have an invisible beard."
"If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you'll probably want to know is where I started the beard, and what my lousy scruff was like, and how my follicles were occupied and all before they had my beard, and all that David Copperfield kind of crap, but I don't feel like going into it, if you want to know the truth."
"He was an old man who fished alone in a skiff in the Gulf Stream and he had gone eighty-four days now without trimming his beard."
"It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the house-tops, and fiercely agitating the scanty hairs of the beards that struggled against the barbers."
(Score: 2) by driverless on Thursday January 24 2019, @02:47PM (3 children)
"What now? Let me tell you what now. I'ma call a coupla hard, pipe-hittin' niggers, who'll go to work on the homes here with a pair of Gillettes and some shaving cream. You hear me talkin', hillbilly boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'ma get medieval on your beard".
(Score: 3, Funny) by fyngyrz on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:15PM (2 children)
It was a dark and hirsute face outside the gates of Paris.
I, having been challenged, had the choice of blades.
I chose my rusty, trusty razor;
I turned; I shaved!
My opponent's beard fell through his second's arms!
I have shaved a beard, cried I!
A beard, said they?
A beard, said I.
Bristles! My beard! We must meet!
It was a dark and hirsute face outside the gates of Paris...
--
Entropy is a bitch.
(Score: 2) by driverless on Monday January 28 2019, @11:23PM (1 child)
Definitely the best one in the thread :-).
(Score: 2) by fyngyrz on Tuesday January 29 2019, @12:23AM
Thankq, suh. :)
--
I feel like I'm in season 5 of my life and the writers are
making ridiculous stuff happen to keep it interesting.
(Score: 5, Funny) by PartTimeZombie on Thursday January 24 2019, @02:38AM (7 children)
The link to the Gentleman Lawyers's guide to facial hair starts with: "A proper beard makes a man more intimidating to his enemies. And since lawyering is about 90% mental, you should all listen up."
Look up and to the left and the profile picture is of some fool wearing a bow tie, which is the least intimidating item of clothing possible, beard or no beard.
If I walked into a lawyer's office and he was wearing a bow tie, I would walk out, as his judgement is obviously compromised.
Thanks for reading. Go about your business now, while I calm myself down.
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @03:09AM (3 children)
Yup, I didnt realize this until some dude told me he was jealous of my full beard. Did not even occur to me that it was some alpha male thing to grow a beard.
This is a stupid development. Being considerate is one thing, but if someone's simple existence is a problem for other people then the problem is with the other people!! Of course this assumes that your existence does not infringe the lives of other people.
Growing a beard is a moral consideration? You do you but fuck off telling me my laziness is oppressing you.
(Score: 3, Funny) by Nuke on Thursday January 24 2019, @10:22AM (1 child)
Neither did I. The initial impression that a beard gives (like a name) depends on who you have known in the past with one. I have known some complete jerks with beards, who seem to have grown it in an attempt to get others to take them seriously. One thing is certain - a beard makes a man look older than he is. I have also known some very small men who have grown one, presumably because they would rather be mistaken for a garden gnome than for a boy.
I don't know how women can stand men with beards : the sexual act must feel like their boobs being rubbed with a wire brush, depending on heights of course, so perhaps they stick to the Helicopter Position, which saves her from having to see the beard too.
(Score: 1, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:23PM
Says tha bald faced ninny who leaves a rash on his lovers where ever his face might lay. Either that or you're hyper anal and shave each and every day, meaning you've got soft hands an a sad pool of pud hardly fit for anything related to what might ve called fucking. I bet you don't even go down on your man. Take your Boy George and your Village People album and get the fuck outta here Liberace
(Score: 2) by tangomargarine on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:06PM
I have a former coworker I'm still in contact with who grew his out for exactly the opposite reason: he's very tall and he says the beard makes him seem less formidable.
"Is that really true?" "I just spent the last hour telling you to think for yourself! Didn't you hear anything I said?"
(Score: 2) by AthanasiusKircher on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:49AM (1 child)
Have you been to the American South(east)? Bow ties are still sometimes worn by professional men (including lawyers). They're not a common choice for everyday wear anymore, but they're not quite the mark of certain eccentricity they definitely are elsewhere.
(Score: 2) by PartTimeZombie on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:36PM
I have been to (a part of) the American South, yes.
I can't remember seeing anybody wearing a bow tie, but I can tell you that if a southern lawyer wore his bow tie in almost any other part of the western world, people would snigger behind their hands.
(Score: 4, Insightful) by stretch611 on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:43AM
Any guide with "Gentleman" and "Lawyer" as part of the title is obviously flawed from the beginning.
Now with 5 covid vaccine shots/boosters altering my DNA :P
(Score: 4, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @02:39AM
Since feminists are letting their facial hair grow long, its only fair that men are allowed the same privilege.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @02:40AM (6 children)
Hey old dude!!
how was it in your time? shaved or bearded?
(Score: 3, Funny) by aristarchus on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:23AM (5 children)
Have you ever shaved with a bronze sword? Painful, to say the least, and the results are less than pleasant. But then the invented iron, or some version of it. Closer shave, less servants involved. But finally it was the Electrolysis! You just zap the roots, and you are a perpetual beardless boy! Works on pubes and backs, as well? Gotta love technologyy, things like Raze on your iPhone. We never had that back in the day! It was more stick and clubs, and Archemedian water lifts. Oh, and steam engines. Check it out.
(Score: 3, Funny) by Pslytely Psycho on Thursday January 24 2019, @03:58PM (2 children)
Bronze?!?
Child, we used flint-knapped Obsidian...the scabs healed over in a few days and only occasionally got infected. The scars made us more manly if we survived (remember poor Ug, who tried it on his nethers to impress the ladies and became one himself).
Alex Jones lawyer inspires new TV series: CSI Moron Division.
(Score: 2) by RamiK on Friday January 25 2019, @12:08AM (1 child)
Not to be a spoil sport but the ancients mostly used pumice stone to shave. And yeah apparently it hurts: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JP5lIs5kAkg [youtube.com]
compiling...
(Score: 2) by Pslytely Psycho on Friday January 25 2019, @03:48AM
Ouch!
It was a no research joke.
And the obsidian knife just seems more manly!
Alex Jones lawyer inspires new TV series: CSI Moron Division.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday January 25 2019, @02:19AM (1 child)
Do Eunuchs have beards?
(Score: 2) by aristarchus on Friday January 25 2019, @03:49AM
Why do you ask? Do you think your's is in error?
(Score: 2) by Runaway1956 on Thursday January 24 2019, @02:51AM
All animals groom themselves, of course. It's odd, however, that some select simians groom themselves in a manner that disguises their simian origins. Hairless apes? There is no such thing, of course. They all have hair, but a small group of those apes seem to be ashamed of their hair.
Let it grow!
(Score: 3, Funny) by RandomFactor on Thursday January 24 2019, @02:58AM (26 children)
Wasn't there a commercial that basically did this just a few days ago?
В «Правде» нет известий, в «Известиях» нет правды
(Score: 3, Informative) by Runaway1956 on Thursday January 24 2019, @03:31AM (4 children)
If our road signs
Catch your eye
Smile
But don't forget
To buy
Burma-Shave
(Score: 2) by Azuma Hazuki on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:51AM
Don't take that curve
At 60 per
We hate to lose
A customer
- Probably Not Burma Shave
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 2, Funny) by fustakrakich on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:00AM (2 children)
I have a sad story to tell you,
It may hurt your feelings a bit.
Last night when I walked into my bathroom,
I stepped in a big pile of ... [youtube.com]
La politica e i criminali sono la stessa cosa..
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @07:40AM (1 child)
Offtopic? Somebody didn't click the link!
(Score: 2) by insanumingenium on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:28PM
And missed their daily dose of Demento to boot! How could anyone miss those lyrics.
(Score: 5, Insightful) by Kalas on Thursday January 24 2019, @03:41AM (20 children)
Yeah, I literally just clicked over from some analysis of that sexist and racist Gillette ad to F5 SN and assumed this would be somehow related. For those not in the know this so called advertisement [youtube.com], that does not feature razors whatsoever mind you, basically managed to insinuate that most or all men are guilty of "toxic masculinity", that women are incapable of handling a conflict without a man stepping in to help, AND that white men in particular are especially problematic. Notice that all 8 acts of "bad" behavior (including having the gall to even approach a woman you find attractive) are committed by white men, and almost all times another man intervenes he's black. They manage to do all that to shoot themselves in the foot in under 2 minutes. Sickening
On top of, they claim to want to "start a conversation" yet as soon as the dislikes started pouring in they began to engage in rampant censorship that continues to this day. Hiring armies of people to delete unfavorable comments no matter how highly rated, hiring people to make positive comments and try to cast doubt on the negative ones, buying likes for the video and paid comments, and outright deleting dislikes. I think they even got Google's help in reigning in the like to dislike ratio which was under 1:10 before they started censoring. It's been stuck at 1.2M for days so you can be sure new dislikes aren't counted. They've deleted millions already.
So between putting a radical man-hating feminist in charge of (and appearing in) the ad and the blatant censorship after trying to "start a conversation" I'm done with them. Gillette's parent company is Proctor & Gamble so I'll be avoiding their products as best I can from now on and recommending others do the same.
(Score: 0, Disagree) by Azuma Hazuki on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:56AM (17 children)
You, um, actually might be the target audience of that advertisement. Or at least one of the people who would benefit from taking it into consideration. Hint: what do we call people who get incredibly easily offended by the opinions of others and take it as a personal attack...? Yup: snowflakes.
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 5, Insightful) by khallow on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:32AM (8 children)
Let's suppose that's true. Why should he continue to buy products from a business that creates two minute ads just to attack his beliefs and himself directly? Suppose Walmart does a two minute ad attacking us, people who write their opinions on the internet with over-the-top exaggerations and mocking of the activities in question. Or target researchers. I think most of us would say "I'll buy my stuff elsewhere" rather than encourage that crap.
Sure, it's an opinion, but it's also a two minute bit of propaganda.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:28AM
Khallow has no beard. Obvious from the obvious rebuttal to his non-bearded arguments on things like economics and fiscal policy. And Justice. No beard, no justice.
(Score: 5, Interesting) by Azuma Hazuki on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:39AM (6 children)
I judge things by whether they're true or not. It's true I dislike the propaganda format, but what's being said is true. In fact, once the average man wakes up and realizes he has more in common with the average woman than with any rich man, a good half of the artificial gender war we've got going on will collapse.
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 1, Touché) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:57AM
Are we at war? To me it seems like a bunch of chicks clucking and a proportionate amount of cocks crowing. Most don't give a fuck. Situation in your country might differ.
(Score: 1, Troll) by khallow on Thursday January 24 2019, @07:55AM
Neither has been my problem. I don't need to wake up and realize that Bill Gates has more money than me (the only big thing that I don't have in common with Bill Gates more or less aside from some life experience and style differences). But I guess I am woke enough to realize that doesn't matter even the slightest to my life.
As to this ad campaign, this has nothing to do with average men or women. Some idiot was given a bunch of money to show guys with alternating crossed arms and outdoor grills (and other manifestations of toxic masculinity that I can't begin to care about). We'll probably find out that some Gillette investor needed the tax write off Uwe Boll-style (he didn't direct this, right?).
My take is that the woodenness of the presentation reveals the artificiality of the underlying propaganda, like the many, many saluting Nazis in Triumph of the Will [wikipedia.org]. It's just another creepy bit of history which will probably cost Gillette a little bit of business and customer goodwill. Such is life.
(Score: 3, Insightful) by Freeman on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:40PM (3 children)
You're deluding yourself, if you think the last half of your post is true. I watched the video and actually think they did a pretty good job, all things considered. Though, really, there should have been an instance or two of black men as the problem as well. As opposed to them being shown as the only ethnicity of men to stand up for women. Pretty much black men were being lifted high, while all the others were being thrown under the bus. Which definitely doesn't reflect reality. "Boys will be boys" is true to an extent, but condoning fist fights is ludicrous. Boys have their own set of hormones they have to deal with. Just like Girls have their own set of hormones they have to deal with. The difference is that Girls generally get the loving supportive shoulder to cry on. While boys get a swift kick in the pants. That's definitely wrong. Boys and girls both need support and to be taught to deal with their emotions in a positive manner.
Joshua 1:9 "Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee"
(Score: 2) by Azuma Hazuki on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:13PM (2 children)
Agreed. And who is doing this to boys? Other men and other boys, for the most part. This is why my feminism includes a place for men in it.
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday January 25 2019, @04:37AM (1 child)
Apparently you've never met my mom.
(Score: 2) by Azuma Hazuki on Friday January 25 2019, @07:07AM
If she's doing that, that's abuse, and frankly it's also misandry. I'm not one of those people who believes women can do no wrong by nature, if that helps; I've seen plenty of them willfully perpetuate the harmful effects of the kyriarchy/patriarchy, for reasons I can't even begin to guess at.
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @07:02AM (1 child)
Feminists: You are cry a baby, man-up.
Also feminists: Men should cry.
Moral: Cry on only approved things.
(Score: 4, Insightful) by Azuma Hazuki on Thursday January 24 2019, @07:24AM
Last I heard, it was other men telling men to man up, boys don't cry, etc etc. I'd rather see a man cry than shoot someone, for about the same reason I'd rather lance a boil than let it turn into blood poisoning.
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 2) by Kalas on Thursday January 24 2019, @08:50AM (5 children)
In retrospect, yes I was acting out of character when I posted that. I was in an altered state of mind for medical reasons and was pissed off after making the mistake of subjecting myself to too many youtube comments. Normally my response would be more restrained but I wasn't in a normal state of mind so I can see how someone might dish out my very first downmod. It just took some sobering up to see it. There aren't many things that can truly piss me off but this deliberately divisive crap crosses my shit line like nothing else.
But all that aside, my points were fair and with the state of society today I think they absolutely needed to be said. That this hateful bullshit be called out for what it is whenever we see it trying to make us less compassionate for our fellow man or woman. And from the look of your other posts I'd say we're perfect agreement on the matter.
(Score: 2) by Kalas on Thursday January 24 2019, @08:55AM (4 children)
Ugh, sure enough it's poorly edited. This is why I debated posting right before bed vs finally getting some sleep.
(Score: 2) by Freeman on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:19PM (3 children)
You can't please everyone. Trying to do so will inevitably lead to problems. In fact, I would say, trying to please others isn't what you should be focusing on at all. There's being considerate and then there's being a "Yes Man".
Joshua 1:9 "Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee"
(Score: 2) by Azuma Hazuki on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:17PM (2 children)
And then there's being a solipsistic, willfully-ignorant jackoff like you, who literally resorts to spewing Bible verses whenever he sees something he can't handle. You are the last person who should be talking about this.
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 2) by Mykl on Friday January 25 2019, @02:34AM (1 child)
Perhaps we need a "-1, Unhelpful" mod.
Azuma - I get that you have a problem with Freeman. But his specific post here was perfectly reasonable and positive and did not merit your bile-filled post. Why not respond to each post on its merits instead of carrying unrelated grudges across from other conversations (which I've seen you do many times)?
(Score: 2) by Azuma Hazuki on Friday January 25 2019, @07:10AM
Uh...have you *seen* *his* posts? If you want to talk about unhelpful...
Look, some people deserve all the bile and spite there is and more. Go read his post history. "Civil" is not the same thing as helpful, or reasonable, or useful, or even correct. Like, at all. And I am in despair watching this place slowly sink into a poisonous cesspit of RWA sewage, anti-vax and other anti-scientific bullshit, and general willful ignorance. I have to fight. What choice do I have? What choice does anyone with a working conscience have?
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:50PM
Honest question, do they air a 2 minute piece as a commercial? Or is this something people can only see by intentionally going to youtube to watch it?
I don't think I've ever seen a 2 minute ad ...
(Score: 2) by The Mighty Buzzard on Friday January 25 2019, @02:14AM
See, this makes me glad of two things.
First, that I don't watch TV. I unhooked the rabbit ears that was my only source of being advertised to via the television last year because I hadn't used them in the previous three.
Second, I already have a beard and don't have to give even a tenth of a shit about what Gillette says or does. Hell, when I'm not wearing a beard I use an old double-edged safety razor whose blades cost less than a buck for a pack.
My rights don't end where your fear begins.
(Score: 2, Interesting) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @03:32AM (2 children)
TFS summarizes the contextual waffle TFA introduces the topic with, but the only actual summary of his points seems to be this single sentence:
Anyone who's read this shit care to offer a summary?
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:57AM
That statement is why I see it as not worth reading.
Sounds like yet another article about how it's bad to be male. Ho-hum.
(Score: 3, Funny) by The Mighty Buzzard on Friday January 25 2019, @02:16AM
I'm with the AC above. If you worry that your masculinity might offend someone, you don't need to worry; you don't have any to offend with.
My rights don't end where your fear begins.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @03:48AM (8 children)
I'm going five blade.
I've got your "philosopy" right here.
(Score: 2) by takyon on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:08AM (4 children)
I want a laser razor that isn't a scam.
[SIG] 10/28/2017: Soylent Upgrade v14 [soylentnews.org]
(Score: 2) by Freeman on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:43PM (3 children)
Don't worry, the first laser razor malfunctions, will only cause permanent scarring or death.
Joshua 1:9 "Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee"
(Score: 2) by takyon on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:35PM (2 children)
Fuck everything, I don't care about the risk, I want it.
No more shaving micro-abrasions plz.
[SIG] 10/28/2017: Soylent Upgrade v14 [soylentnews.org]
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @08:25PM
Straight razors are nice for getting a smooth shave. Why don't you just get laser hair removal?
(Score: 2) by The Mighty Buzzard on Friday January 25 2019, @02:19AM
First off, how do you plan on wooling around the shark to adjust the angle to get around the fiddly bits?
Second, wuss.
My rights don't end where your fear begins.
(Score: 2, Funny) by aristarchus on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:55AM (2 children)
Philo-sopy? What, prey tell, would that be? Did you mean "philology"? Or "philotelictry"? Or "Philadephy"? City of Brotherly Love, y'all.
(Score: 2) by c0lo on Thursday January 24 2019, @07:42AM
FTFH(im)
The modern times no longer requires soap for lather, but then again one can't stop old people to post on S/N. Fortunately.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
(Score: 3, Touché) by slinches on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:34PM
I think he meant philosophistry.
(Score: 1, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @03:52AM (4 children)
If a philosopher thought a beaver was a type of fish, why should I listen to them about beards?
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:10AM (3 children)
Well, some times a beaver smells like a fish. Does that help?
Philosophy is like masturbation. If you spend more than 30 seconds at it, it means you're gay. It's not a bad thing per se, it's just that philosophy and gay sex produce nothing, except the need to clean up.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @07:00AM
I assume your experience is with the part about masturbation.
(Score: 3, Insightful) by aristarchus on Thursday January 24 2019, @08:02AM (1 child)
Come now! No, cum laterum! No less a philosopher than Renee Descartes his own self said, "There is no opinion so ridiculous that it has not been proposed by some philosopher or an other." Well, maybe, including Mssr. Descartes, especially his diaphoric membreme to conduce the ideas of the mind to the physical body. If he had one.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday January 25 2019, @02:47AM
If he had one.
What, an idea, or a body?
(Score: 2, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:42AM
Sometimes a beard is just a beard.
(Score: 4, Touché) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:46AM (5 children)
Some fuckwad has nothing better to do than ruminate on ... well, it doesn't really matter. They'll find a way to ruin it for the rest of us.
I have had a beard since I was about 16 (so, about 40 years now). I have had it for one, and only one reason: I have a very round face and a beard makes it look less like a flesh-colored pumpkin than if I did not have a beard. No psychological subtext, and no subconscious shenanigans. It simply makes my chipmunk cheeks look less like each contains a chipmunk.
(Score: 3, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:02AM (3 children)
You have so much priviledge you don't even realize the Goebbles level of oppression you are broadcasting to everyone around you by brandishing your beard. Each bristle is another thorn in the heart and soul of equality and fairness.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @07:47AM
... and the dwarfs spring up from the holes in the ground
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @09:09AM
I can live with that. Maybe I should stop shaving my neck for a while and see how that's accepted.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:56PM
https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/it-was-my-privilege [knowyourmeme.com]
(Score: 1) by fustakrakich on Friday January 25 2019, @02:58AM
Some fuckwad has nothing better to do than ruminate on...
This is his business... Don't be so harsh.
La politica e i criminali sono la stessa cosa..
(Score: 3, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:17AM (2 children)
The beards grow anyway. Growing a beard isn't a moral choice, it's a biological function.
The choice is how, and whether, to style it.
As for shaving, some people can but other people cannot. A typical reason is sensitive skin that reacts badly - enough so that even in the US military such people can get no-shave chits. This, in an organisation widely known for being uncaring about individual choices.
Seems to me this philosopher needs some more thinking.
(Score: 2) by Hartree on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:41AM (1 child)
Some of the people I served with in the Army got shaving profiles because their facial hairs would immediate get ingrown and they'd have sores and bumps on their face from it. They didn't just hand them out. The people who got them really did need them.
(Score: 2) by stretch611 on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:50AM
Not the army... But I experienced the same thing working as a developer at UPS 20 years ago. Without a doctor's note, you shaved everyday, or you found a new job. I only remember one person who had sensitive skin like that... not only did he obtain the Dr's note, but he had to get a new updated one on a regular basis.
Now with 5 covid vaccine shots/boosters altering my DNA :P
(Score: 3, Informative) by deimtee on Thursday January 24 2019, @07:11AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RmFnarFSj_U [youtube.com]
If you cough while drinking cheap red wine it really cleans out your sinuses.
(Score: 1) by pTamok on Thursday January 24 2019, @08:00AM
I am not a soldier (or a member of any other profession where facial hair is a danger to myself and/or others), and I believe that, æthsetically, my face looks better with a beard than without (I'm not saying 'good', just 'better'), so I don't shave.
That might still be a danger to me, as there is a correlation between having a beard and having a cardio-vascular problem (like heart attacks or strokes): Shaving, Coronary Heart Disease, and Stroke: The Caerphilly Study [oup.com]
(Score: 2) by cmdrklarg on Thursday January 24 2019, @04:27PM (1 child)
I'd totally have Tony Stark style facial hair, unfortunately mine grows slowly and sparsely (I shave twice a week, max) and doesn't look good (over the xmas break I did not shave, the results were not good). That, and I'm getting quite a few gray hairs in there now. No beard for me.
The world is full of kings and queens who blind your eyes and steal your dreams.
(Score: 2) by Freeman on Thursday January 24 2019, @05:49PM
Pretty much the exact same issue for me. I've never been able to grow a "nice beard", it's always been sorta thin and "wiry". Which isn't a very good look. Plus, my wife doesn't like the scratchy feeling.
Joshua 1:9 "Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee"
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday January 24 2019, @06:35PM
The saddest thing about this story is that someone had to pay for that. Probably our tax dollars.
(Score: 2) by turgid on Thursday January 24 2019, @07:17PM
How does that fit in?
I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent [wikipedia.org].
(Score: 2) by J053 on Thursday January 24 2019, @10:21PM (2 children)
(Score: 3, Interesting) by aristarchus on Friday January 25 2019, @04:00AM (1 child)
You know, the reason soldiers are supposed to have short, or shaved, hair is the same reason that prisoners, slaves, monks, and Dr. Evil have shaved heads: lice. Head lice are very contagius, and if you have a bunch of guys living in "close proximity", it is easier and cheaper to just shave 'em rather than having to de-louse them. Free men, on the other hand, have the money and time to hire someone to pick their nits. Hence the origin of long hair as an assertion of freedom by the Hippies. Oh, and beards.
(Score: 1, Informative) by Anonymous Coward on Friday January 25 2019, @03:57PM
Perhaps in the days of yore this was true, but in the modern day it's necessary to bear a sealed gas mask. Unfortunately a mask will not seal with facial hair under it. I believe there is an exception to the hair policy allotting an individual a moustache. This is doubly true for gas plants, mines, and generators where toxic gases or particulate is [potentially] present.
(Score: 2) by NotSanguine on Thursday January 24 2019, @10:46PM
Ever since I began to sprout facial hair almost forty years ago, I've been engaged in a complicated balancing act.
I hate shaving, as it's a pain in the ass and I'm lazy. I also hate having facial hair, as it's itchy and I don't like how it looks on me.
I came to the conclusion long ago that I hate facial hair more than I hate shaving. So I don't shave until the facial hair starts annoying me, then I do.
In my early thirties, I decided I'd try having a beard for six months then shave it off and see if I missed it.
It was a close-cropped goatee and it was somewhat annoying. When I finally shaved it off, not only did I not miss it, my friends and family all said something along the lines of "thank goodness you shaved that thing off!" And less than a fuck was given.
Not everything is a political statement. And men who complain about how shaving is such a pain in the ass should remember that most women (at least in the US) shave their legs and pits regularly.
What's more of a political statement IMHO is the pressure that women get to shave their pubic hair completely. I can certainly understand wanting to be well-groomed, but *adults* have pubic hair. Social pressure for women to completely shave their pubic hair infantilizes women. It is a little annoying when I get pubic hair stuck in my teeth (TMI?) but but my sexual interests lie with *women* not little girls.
I think that discussion would be more useful and interesting than discussing mens' facial hair.
No, no, you're not thinking; you're just being logical. --Niels Bohr
(Score: 2) by tibman on Friday January 25 2019, @01:03AM (1 child)
Beards have nothing to do with masculinity. Most guys doesn't know what masculine even means. Growing a beard doesn't change who you are, what you do, or what you say.
SN won't survive on lurkers alone. Write comments.
(Score: 2) by aristarchus on Friday January 25 2019, @03:55AM
O! Ye of little faith! Obviously you did not read the dept. line.
(Score: 2) by gawdonblue on Friday January 25 2019, @12:00PM
You've got two mums.