Submitted via IRC for Bytram
Scientists discovered a flying pink squirrel
You've heard of flying squirrels. But hot-pink flying squirrels? Someone get Pixar on the line.
A new study in the Journal of Mammology describes how the North American flying squirrel, or Glaucomys, fluoresces pink at night. The researchers can't say for sure why, but communication and camouflage top their list of theories. Squirrel discos do not appear to be a possibility.
The hot-pink find came about by chance.
In the spring of 2017, Jon Martin, a professor in the forestry department at Wisconsin's Northland College, was scanning his backyard with an ultraviolet flashlight to see which lichens, mosses and plants fluoresced. That's when he spotted a flying squirrel, and noticed it glowed hot pink under the ultraviolet light.
(Score: 5, Funny) by realDonaldTrump on Saturday February 09 2019, @02:31AM (1 child)
But when I did, he told me about the Ultra Violet. He said it's very important, things look different in the Ultra Violet. And things that, normally we don't see, suddenly it's very easy to see them. Be careful, folks!!!
(Score: 4, Informative) by The Mighty Buzzard on Saturday February 09 2019, @04:14AM
Haven't had a relevant Lewinsky joke in quite some time. Good work.
My rights don't end where your fear begins.
(Score: 3, Funny) by Some call me Tim on Saturday February 09 2019, @05:29AM (2 children)
Many drunks have reported seeing pink flying elephants. What if human vision improved dramatically in the ultra violet when the subjects are drunk? Since it was my idea, I get to be one of the test subjects! Free booze and pay, woot!
Questioning science is how you do science!
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday February 09 2019, @10:24AM (1 child)
How about them flying pigs then?
(Score: 2) by lgsoynews on Saturday February 09 2019, @11:31AM
Flying pigs are GREEN, not pink.
Everybody knows that...
(Score: 4, Funny) by Hartree on Saturday February 09 2019, @06:01AM
I wonder if they tried putting panthers under ultraviolet light.
(Score: 1, Offtopic) by aristarchus on Saturday February 09 2019, @06:20AM
So, the defunding and union-busting of ex-governor and Marquette drop-out Scott Walker is finally affecting higher education and research in Wisconsin. When you vote for Republicans, you get stupid. Happened in Montana, when they had a Republican Governor, the highest academic attainment in his administration was a GED. No shit. Walker has destroyed what was one of the premier Research 1 Universities in the nation, UW-Madison. But now, all we get from the entire UW system is pink squirrels. It is almost as if just plain "squirrel!" does not work anymore. So sad, too bad, Trump's dad.
(Score: -1, Offtopic) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday February 09 2019, @07:45AM
Seriously, we could have had a flying pink aristarchus submission instead, without the pretension to scientific rigor, and appeal to the purient interests of the fine residents of the Great State of Arkansaws. Squirrel. Seriously, squirrel. Shiny squirrel. Walmart Squirrel. Squirrel brains squirrel. Nothing to see here squirrel. SoylentNews, news of squirrels. It has come to this [xkcd.com].
(Score: 2) by Bot on Saturday February 09 2019, @08:24AM
- So, when somebody talks about not being able to disprove god, you simply say "you disprove a pink flying squirrel exists first, then we can talk about god"
- PSSSSST it's "an invisible pink unicorn"
- What? come on, like it makes any difference
- It does, pink flying squirrels do exist
- ... uh, OK guys, remember, it must be an INVISIBLE PINK UNICORN... for now.
Account abandoned.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday February 09 2019, @09:15AM (2 children)
Pretty funny how everything happens "by chance". But what is "chance"?
(Score: 1, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday February 09 2019, @10:25AM (1 child)
Something, i for one, do not have.
(Score: 3, Touché) by Bot on Saturday February 09 2019, @12:12PM
It's pretty easy to know the reason too.
AC looked at his wristwatch, he had plenty of time before returning to work. A cozy looking fast food was on the other side of the road. He went in, ordered a coffee and sit down. Two female students started looking at his tall, slender figure.
One of them said: I don't care if he's already taken, I am gonna give it a try.
"Hello, I am pretty sure we already met each other in the swimming team didn't we? but I don't recall your name"
"I AIN'T GONNA TELL YOU MY NAME, MA'AM"
"I think he's high on something", said the other student when the crestfallen girl returned to his seat, "better if we leave".
Such is the life of the anonymous coward.
Account abandoned.
(Score: 2) by TrentDavey on Saturday February 09 2019, @02:33PM
Maybe it helped that 45 minutes prior, he had also spotted a mushroom that fluoresced.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday February 09 2019, @07:09PM
what about a flying pink vulva?
(Score: 2) by PinkyGigglebrain on Sunday February 10 2019, @02:01AM
Until someone can come up with a reason why it would develop fluorescence naturally I can't help but wonder if it is the result of some "art project" that escaped years ago and interbred with the wild population that it's creators didn't want to admit to.
Anyone else remember the "glow in the dark"* fish [glofish.com](as pets), rabbits [wikipedia.org] (For art!), and cats [scientificamerican.com] (at least these were "for science!").
Of course there are many corals that have always glowed in the dark because they evolved that way, but corals and jelly fish are from a different evolutionary branch than mammals. I would like to think this squirrel is the same, it just happened that way, Hells, maybe naturally GITD animals are more common than anyone thought. Time to break out the portable UV spot lights and go see what we can find.
*actually they just fluoresce under blue or UV light
"Beware those who would deny you Knowledge, For in their hearts they dream themselves your Master."