It's summer, and that means health organizations will be periodically showering Americans with reminders of how public swimming venues are actually nightmarish cesspits teeming with microbes that can burn your eyes, ravage your intestines, and eat your brains.
In attempts to communicate some pretty basic health advice—like, don't pee or poop in a public pool and try to avoid gulping toxic algae from lakes—health organizations create a mesmerizing fountain of hilarious, graphic, disturbing, clumsy, and sometimes perplexing advisories.
Given this wellspring of vomitus summer fun, here are our picks for the top five public health advisories bobbing in the waters this summer.
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3. The dipstick testIf swimming pools suddenly seem too confining and ill-equipped to handle the loaded loads we're plunging, maybe a swim in a nice, big, natural lake sounds nice this summer? Think again.
The Wisconsin Department of Health Services wants to ensure you don't swim in any toxin-toting blooms of blue-green algae. In helpful, picture-based tips, the department advises against swimming in water that looks like green pea soup or green latex paint—in case any of those options seemed enticing. Dead fish and "floating scum, globs, or mats" are also (apparently not obvious) signs to stay away.
(Score: 5, Interesting) by Mojibake Tengu on Sunday July 02, @07:05AM
The only outdoor water I consider safe enough for dipping in are... mountain creeks. And only if I know the local geography. You may be surprised what's actually lurking upstream.
Those are cold though, even in summer. So watch yourself for pneumonia.
Some 25+ years ago, when I came to India by airlines, I noticed huge brown stain coming out from Bombay (today: Mumbai) at the sea, spreading dozens of kilometers away to the ocean.
My then-guru only said: Yes, that's poop.
I never enjoyed sea beach in the vicinity of populated areas since then, anywhere on this planet.
The edge of 太玄 cannot be defined, for it is beyond every aspect of design
(Score: 4, Interesting) by Rosco P. Coltrane on Sunday July 02, @07:16AM (1 child)
when I a kid, be it safe swimming pool water, fear of bacteria in the house, fear of letting kids walk to school unattended... yet we all survived. Small wonder!
(Score: 5, Insightful) by Opportunist on Sunday July 02, @10:41AM
Well, fewer people and a more responsible behaviour of those went a loooooong way.
Today, everyone's essentially an eternal toddler, with zero sense of responsibility and a "can't someone else take care of this?" attitude.
(Score: 4, Informative) by pTamok on Sunday July 02, @11:10AM (1 child)
Makes you glad that most of us have working immune systems, although I wouldn't advise testing it too strongly.
I remember hiking with a group that stopped at a colourless, transparent mountain stream to fill their water bottles. I didn't join in. A short distance upstream, we discovered a rotting sheep carcase in the stream,
For a long time I travelled with an iodine resin water filter, which worked very effectively, and for longer stays, used a gravity-fed ceramic (Doulton) water filter system.
Four main rules: Know and mitigate the local risks - e.g. hippopotami, amoebas, other pathogens; Don't swim in obviously contaminated water (e.g. algal blooms, floating sewage etc); Don't swim with an open wound, such as cuts, or grazes; Don't drink the untreated water.
(Score: 2) by Reziac on Monday July 03, @02:14AM
The dead sheep was probably less of an issue than the giardia from whatever wildlife were in the area...
And there is no Alkibiades to come back and save us from ourselves.
(Score: 2) by SomeGuy on Sunday July 02, @12:03PM
Georgians should flush twice....
It's a long way to the Chattahoochee.
An entire story about filthy swimming conditions and they don't even mention that big sewer line leak in the Chattahoochee river going on right now.
(Score: 3, Informative) by turgid on Sunday July 02, @02:18PM
Our privatised water companies (go figure) have been busy pumping raw sewage into our rivers and seas.
I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent [wikipedia.org].
(Score: 4, Funny) by VLM on Sunday July 02, @06:42PM
Drunk people are going to do drunk stuff regardless what Big Brother advises, so this is just CYA on their part. "We told em not to eat the yellow snow but they ate it anyway..."