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posted by NCommander on Tuesday April 01 2014, @02:50AM   Printer-friendly
from the I-for-one-welcome-our-new-muffiny-overlords dept.
Effectively immediately, the corn muffin in the staff refrigerator has succeeded in getting NCommander to sell out for the mindbogging huge sum of one million Vietnamese Dong. Deciding that allowing the community to decide on issues is stupid, our new muffiny overlord has renamed the site "SoylentMuffins". The muffin has been quoted that it plans to change the world, and while a manifesto is yet to be written, it unveiled its new slogan of "SoylentMuffins are made from people!", and that it hopes the community follows, in its own words, "ridding the planet of the human race".

I for one am excited to follow such a visionary pastry in its attempt at world domination!

The Bacon Eaters of ## were unavailable to comment at this time on this shocking turn of events , but we'll update this story once we've heard from them.
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  • (Score: 4, Funny) by Open4D on Tuesday April 01 2014, @08:48AM

    by Open4D (371) on Tuesday April 01 2014, @08:48AM (#23977) Journal

    Open4D writes:

    The Wall Street Journal [] reports that Dice Corp has completed its purchase of Soylent News.

    In joyous scenes, the Soylent News community welcomed the buyout, along with the news that the co-owners, known on site as "Barbarous" and "NDictator" were still
    good friends:

    A couple of weeks into the project, we realized it needed an existential threat to give it some impetus. So we engineered a falling out between us. Geek community project forks normally have so little drama that we were surprised people fell for this, but it worked a treat!

    We've got lots of great ideas we're going to implement now the purchase is complete. It's clear that the world needs a new framework language for Web 3.0 and the Cloud and shit. We're going to be working on this language, and in parallel using it to develop Soylent News Beta, which is scheduled for go-live in early May. Work on both starts in a week or so.

    When asked how they'll maintain community loyalty in the face these changes, they answered:

    Well one idea, inspired by the work of the world's financial institutions over the last few years, is that we could print karma. We're thinking karma+=1000 for each page load. We'd obviously need to increase the thresholds accordingly - so that people were actually worse off overall - but we know the users would appreciate the gesture.

    The truth is, a week ago we were a little uncertain about whether to proceed with the sale, but on seeing how well the Occulus Rift community took the news of the Facebook buy-out, we knew we wanted that for our audience.

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