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[Hiring] Soggy Jobs is Now Accepting Applications

Journal by MichaelDavidCrawford
The Global Employer Index is accepting applications for work starting on Monday, April 8 2019:
  • Entry-Level Quality Assurance Developer
  • Back End Developer
  • Senior Front End Developer

Depending on experience, our new employees will be paid Portland area competitive market rate salaries. Look up your current job title and your actual experience at Payscale.com to get an estimate of your pay.

Please send your application in hardcopy form via postal mail:

Portland Custom Software Development
NedSpace Broadway
707 SW Washington St Suite 1100
Portland, OR 97205-3528

The start date is long time from now so do take all the time you require to write your cover letter. In your cover please list the titles and authors of a few of your favorite books.

Our hair isn't pointy; you do not need a Computer Science degree! While the Senior Front End Developer does require Javascript expertise, neither developer job needs experience with any particular framework.

We are writing our back end in Python but will happily hire a Back End coder who has experience in any of Perl, Ruby, Java, PHP, Node.js and the like.

Our Entry-Level QA position would be perfect for recent college graduates as well as technically inclined high school graduates. We will consider part-time work for current high school students.

 

Reply to: Re:ATTN: AC - How Many Jobs Did You Apply For Last

    (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday September 29 2018, @09:44PM

    by Anonymous Coward on Saturday September 29 2018, @09:44PM (#741917)

    Dozens, hundreds, I don't even count anymore.

    Golly gee, what reason would I ever have for being angry? Maybe the fact that every single job posting is fucking fake? Maybe the fact that every single interviewer is a fucking asshole?

    I am tired of being praised for my skills by lying scumbag motherfuckers who never have any intention of hiring anyone. Their fake jobs stay open for months, reposted every week, never to be filled. Some job boards actually admit most jobs are ultimately closed not filled. The jobs simply do not fucking exist.

    I told your dickheadness that I would believe your job board is real when one of your utterly fraudulent companies hires me. This event has not occurred. So instead I spend my time coding on the bus, thinking to myself, I'm the only person on this bus passionate enough about coding to code on the bus, so why the fuck can't I ever find a coding job.

    Your tech industry is shit, and you're an opportunist motherfucking asshole for helping fraudulent companies commit fraud.

    Go fuck yourself and eat shit and die, MDC.

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