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from the getting-an-early-start-on-Halloween dept.
Stunning Bronze Age statuette with a tattooed face and a bone mask found in Siberia:
'Given that the discovery is 5,000 years old, you can imagine how important it is to understand the beliefs of the ancient people populating Siberia', said Vyacheslav Molodin.
The discovery was made this summer inside the mass burial of people from Odinov culture in Vengerovsky district of Novosibirsk region, Western Siberia.
The small - about a palm size - statuette found in situ by the team of Novosibirsk Institute of Archeology and Ethnography had a mask depicting a bear made of a horse vertebrae.
'This is without a doubt the find of the season, the find that any world museum from the Hermitage to the Louvre museum would love to exhibit', said professor Vyacheslav Molodin, head of the Ust-Tartas 2 expedition.
'We've never come across anything like this, despite our extensive knowledge of the Odinov culture's burial rites.
'The woman must have been an unusual person to have such a figurine 'escoring'[sic] her to the afterlife', he said.
(Score: 5, Funny) by fakefuck39 on Wednesday October 07 2020, @09:38PM (2 children)
offtopic, but the russian girls from siberia are really hot. they don't have those horse-face big nose slavic traits that turn all the hot 20yo russians into 30yo horse-faced thots. they have very cool eyes too - like a glowing blue/green/hazel look, with very vibrant colors. not good to have a relationship with, because like all russian girls they're entitled gold-digging toxic self-absorbed bitches, but unlike others who expire around 25, they look good enough to give them a bone mask well into their 30s.
(Score: 2, Flamebait) by Arik on Wednesday October 07 2020, @11:04PM (1 child)
What you're looking at is not genetics, it's plastic surgery and selection, in varying degrees.
If laughter is the best medicine, who are the best doctors?
(Score: 2, Insightful) by fakefuck39 on Thursday October 08 2020, @03:27PM
Being of Russian descent myself, and having spent 4 years of my adult life in Moscow for work, I assure you that it is your only experience with russian girls, not mine, that is from porn sites. In fact, I assure you that your only experience with any attractive women is from porn sites. Because the two who actually fucked you were white trash old whales.
(Score: 4, Interesting) by Arik on Wednesday October 07 2020, @10:37PM (3 children)
"'Interestingly, our anthropologists and genetics found that the Odino people were Mongoloids, yet the face of the figurine had clear Caucasian features. We don’t see the gender of the figurine, which is unusual, and we can’t say if it was dressed’"
This sort of analysis is an exercise in projection. What they mean by 'Mongoloid' is something like 'matching, either in outward form /or/ in genetics, a recent east asian 'type' of human.' Which just doesn't tell us much at all, in a context that's 5kya.
So, 5kya, there was no 'Mongoloid' type. Not as a characteristic type of a large section of a continent, at least. To the extent it existed it was somewhat analogous to the way that certain Europeans have a much more 'Mongoloid' appearance than others. All the traits existed. But they weren't concentrated in one geographic area, they were found all across Eurasia, in many populations, side by side with what we would perceive as more 'Caucasoid' types, even inside the same family. The modern 'Mongoloid' near-homogeneity in the east is of post-Bronze age origin (as is the less-near-homogeneity of 'Caucasoid' types in the west, by the way.)
So it's at best a naïve mistake for them to be making this sort of analysis. It's not exactly garbage in garbage out, it's a garbage algorithm being fed (presumably) perfectly good data. But the output is still predictably garbage.
The genetic analysis might seem more promising on the face of it, but the language leads me to suspect they're doing the sort of statistical analysis currently in vogue - just looking for correlations across the database without taking into account the functional characteristics of the various genes involved.
These sorts of mistakes will cause all manner of nonsensical interpretations to arise from even the best data.
If laughter is the best medicine, who are the best doctors?
(Score: 1, Interesting) by Ethanol-fueled on Wednesday October 07 2020, @11:57PM (1 child)
I don't see where race factors into this. Looking at the pictures in the article, it looked a lot like somebody made a doll of Jack the Pumpkin King and then carved it out through the cloaca until it became a proto-historic pocket pussy.
Baking clay in ovens was how they made pocket-pussies back then, they didn't have all these fancy silicone moldings like they do nowadays.
(Score: 2, Flamebait) by Arik on Thursday October 08 2020, @12:18AM
Well, ideally, it shouldn't.
I was just pointing out that the article implies the actual situation is less than ideal in that regard.
Signal must be distinguished from noise.
"Looking at the pictures in the article, it looked a lot like somebody made a doll of Jack the Pumpkin King and then carved it out through the cloaca until it became a proto-historic pocket pussy."
Yeah, ok, something like that.
A generic human profile, what came to *my* mind was a gingerbread man. With a long channel up the front. Could be a few reasons for that.
"Baking clay in ovens was how they made pocket-pussies back then"
Err, no. No.
OMG for the love of humanity;
no.
Try it. Tell us, later, how many gallons of lube you went through before you realized it was simply a lost cause, and would never work, even were the entire universe made of lube, and responsive to your desires?
And just how badly did you injure yourself in the process?
Schadenfreude is just a river in Egypt. Trust me.
If laughter is the best medicine, who are the best doctors?
(Score: 1, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday October 08 2020, @04:47PM
More like the Asian woman was buried with her god: the White man. Deal with it, it's the truth even if you people rush to cover it up every time it pops up.
(Score: -1, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday October 07 2020, @10:38PM
Edvard Munch copied it. Sue!
(Score: -1, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday October 07 2020, @10:47PM (3 children)
Communism never worked, but this is Russians we're talking about. Russians could have built Galt's Gulch in Siberia and still fucked it up. Russian losers couldn't even make it to the Moon. What a bunch of fucking losers.
America #1
Vote Trump For Life
Make America Great Again And Again And Again
(Score: 1, Troll) by Arik on Wednesday October 07 2020, @10:59PM
Y'all never got to the playoffs.
Sore loser.
If laughter is the best medicine, who are the best doctors?
(Score: 1, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday October 08 2020, @12:57AM (1 child)
So decide yourself, did the USA fake the moon landing or did they beat the USSR and land in the moon?! you can't have both, no way!!
And by the way, if the earth is flat, the moon should also be flat, just a projection in the ether, who can someone even walk in a projection?!
Actually, USSR never really raced to the moon, probes already had shown that it would be expensive and mostly useless... as the USA later found out and finally canceled then after the initial marketing bonus.
Oohh well, might be a mix between bad food, bad schools, imperial metric system (and now COVID, make America #1 again!) that make you understand things that the rest of the world will never understand!
Signed:
Rest of the World
(Score: 1, Interesting) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday October 08 2020, @06:56AM
Wait a bit and ask the Chinese if they see the US flag in the moon.