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THOMSON, Ga. - Upson County Sheriff's deputies said a hand-held massager that resembled a gun prompted a lockdown at all schools in Upson County.
Deputies reported that the incident occurred on Tuesday around 11:50 a.m. when a parent dialed 911 stating their child saw another student with a handgun while in the boy's restroom at school.
Authorities were able to notify school staff, which caused the entire school district to be placed on lockdown.
"Through investigation, it was found that a male student had a hand-held massager that resembled a handgun. The student in possession of the massager admitted that he possessed it in the restroom and pointed it at another student," Thomson-Upson County officials said.
There were no injuries reported.
Apparent image here, though it is not clear the image accurately portrays the vibrator in question: https://cdn0.thetruthaboutguns.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/massage.png
I certainly hope this little sex terrorist is dealt with appropriately!! He probably intended to lure females into the boy's room where he would force himself upon them! /sarcasm
At least he didn't intend for anyone to consume his weapon of mass enjoyment. https://reason.com/2016/06/16/judge-upholds-suspension-of-the-pop-tart/
(Score: 2, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @02:44PM (5 children)
Must have rubbed them the wrong way.
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @03:56PM (4 children)
More likely, a concerned parent saw what looked like a gun and memories of Uvalde, Parkland, Columbine, et al. immediately came to mind. Could we please let up with the gun play in this country? I think we could all do with a break for a while.
(Score: 3, Funny) by DeathMonkey on Wednesday August 10 2022, @04:28PM (3 children)
He also had a dildo in the boy's bathroom. Does that immediately get you banned from highschool sports in GA?
(Score: 0, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @05:07PM
Speaking of Dildos:
Trump Takes Fifth Amendment
National Archives Demand Its Return
(Score: 2) by DannyB on Wednesday August 10 2022, @05:53PM (1 child)
I think you misspelled boned.
Would a Dyson sphere [soylentnews.org] actually work?
(Score: 3, Informative) by DeathMonkey on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:19PM
No, that was Gym Jordan.
(Score: 2, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @04:55PM (7 children)
He probably intended to lure females into the boy's room where he would covertly teach them critical race theory, which is banned from Georgia schools.
With this new information, Runaway will now conclude that the authorities and staff acted completely appropriately, but call for an investigation of how police response times can be improved.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @04:59PM (4 children)
Police response to what? Horny teenagers in the bathroom? Just about all of us have been guilty of that once upon a time.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @05:05PM (3 children)
Do I really have to explain the joke to you? Well, there are actually two jokes here, but I'm not going to explain Runaway to you.
When I was in high school, students would go into the restrooms and smoke, because smoking was banned in the school. It was quite common; the restrooms always smelled of smoke, and often had discarded cigarettes in them. I am humorously suggesting the same thing is happening with teaching critical race theory, because it is now banned from Georgia schools.
(Score: -1, Flamebait) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @05:43PM (2 children)
It is somehow appropriate that you equate CRT to dirty, nasty habits such as smoking, or massaging fellow student's private areas in public bathrooms.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:15PM
I bet you get mad reading the Onion.
Here's a story for you to read: https://www.theonion.com/astronaut-clearly-only-selected-for-mission-because-he-1849392035 [theonion.com]
Admit it, that story made you angry... HOW DARE NASA ENGAGE IN SUCH NEPOTISM
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday August 11 2022, @10:25PM
Yes, they should be vaping dry herb instead and using glory holes.
(Score: 4, Funny) by DeathMonkey on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:21PM (1 child)
I think it's all good so long as it's in the correct locker room. Locker room banter is totally fine no matter what wacky shit you say, right?
If you can admit to sexual assault you should certainly be able to admit to historical Redlining amiright?!?!
(Score: 2, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:33PM
PSA: It's totally okay to grab 'em by the pussy and make 'em read the 1619 project.
The more you know!
(Score: 3, Insightful) by DannyB on Wednesday August 10 2022, @05:58PM (2 children)
I have a friend much older than I am who has a powerful gun shaped massager similar to the one in TFA. It is used for nothing more interesting than his left shoulder.
Not the use most people (including myself) first think of.
How difficult is it to imagine that a teen boy in a restroom might have such a powerful massager for some purpose such as advanced arthritis?
Would a Dyson sphere [soylentnews.org] actually work?
(Score: 1, Interesting) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday August 11 2022, @02:12AM (1 child)
No need for imagination when the internet will suffice.
Juvenile idiopathic arthritis [mayoclinic.org]
Arthritis in Teens: Symptoms, Causes, Treatments and Prevention by Dr. Sagar Bhattad [beingtheparent.com]
(Score: -1, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday August 11 2022, @04:07AM
glub glub so many AC fishies in a fish tank
(Score: 4, Informative) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:05PM (18 children)
So trans people doing nothing except existing are a serious threat for reasons while a school over rracting to a massage gun and possible actual sexual acts in bathrooms is mocked. I think the story is silly, but runaway posting it after all the other hysterical propaganda journals seems like intentionally rubbing our faces in his hypocrisy. It is almost like he is a troll /shocked_pikachu
(Score: -1, Flamebait) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:22PM (1 child)
You conveniently forget and ignore the fact that many "transvestites" are actually sex predators who troll the women's facilities for helpless victims. Why do you want to enable predators?
(Score: 3, Informative) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:40PM
All too often, the people who are most outraged about deviant sexual practices are actually engaging in such deviant sexual practices.
I can't help but notice that you are quite outraged...
(Score: 3, Troll) by DeathMonkey on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:24PM (4 children)
When someone tells you who they are, believe them.
Trolls don't exist except in fairy tales.
If you think he's pretending about any of this I've got a troll home to sell ya!
(Score: 1) by khallow on Thursday August 11 2022, @12:26PM (3 children)
What does it take these days for someone to "tell you who they are"? Too often, it's just someone else just going off on an irrelevant narrative.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday August 11 2022, @01:19PM
Like bathroom rape (somehow only results in "real" women being saved from butch lesbians when the One Good Man rushes into the bathroom), stare rape (especially when darkies are involved), retroactive rape (gotta save face when mommy finds out her little girl has become a little woman), and rape rape?
It's just rapists around every corner with right-wingers.
(Score: 2) by DeathMonkey on Thursday August 11 2022, @04:12PM
You've told me who you are and it's fine. We just disagree about stuff.
Runaway, on the other hand, worries me.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday August 12 2022, @03:39AM
Irrelevant, or irreverent?
(Score: -1, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:24PM (10 children)
Runaway is just angry that the boy wasn't using an actual handgun to arouse himself and other students.
Here's what Runaway is thinking: That child should have had access to actual handguns to use as sex toys. Back in my day, I shoved an entire AR-15 up my ass for pleasure. It was the giver, I was the receiver, and it just felt soooo good. Kids should be allowed to stretch their imaginations and dream about what is possible. I'd have gotten better grades if I didn't spend so much time in class dreaming about one day shoving an entire RPG up there. Those damned libruls just keep ruining all the good clean fun we had as kids. It's the moral decline of America that kids can only pleasure themselves with handgun lookalikes instead of actual handguns.
(Score: 2, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:40PM (9 children)
Don't receivers have to be serialized? Will a branding iron work or must it be a tattoo?
(Score: -1, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @06:47PM (2 children)
I have no idea; I just know this is a great insurance policy for Runaway.
If any gubmint types try to seize his guns, he'll just tell them where those guns have been. No way any of them are brave enough to touch his guns after that.
(Score: 1) by khallow on Wednesday August 10 2022, @11:28PM
(Score: 1, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday August 10 2022, @11:33PM
But is Runaway an upper (top) or a lower (bottom), and is he cut, or full-auto?
(Score: -1, Offtopic) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday August 11 2022, @12:21AM (3 children)
Best to make sure you know whose gun you're polishing, now that monkeypox is spreading. Stay safe out there!
ICFI/SEP/IWA-RFC: As COVID-19 spread deepens, Arkansas reports a dozen cases of monkeypox [wsws.org]
(Score: 0, Spam) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday August 11 2022, @06:11AM (2 children)
This right cher is why SoylentNews is going down. Brits. Bad enough that janrinok did not get a reference to Yogi Berra, he probably does not get allusions to Mark Twain, as well. Or, to cite a recent incident, Herman Melville, and Moby Dick. Brits are funny that way, they don't see American literature as English literature. And that is why they cannot comprehend the critical contributions of aristarchus to this site. They do not understand, so they think "off topic", and thus the discussion ends due to British insensitivity. And Brit insensitivity from having dwelt in Finland, only makes it worse.
So keep polishing Runaway's gun, even though he does not know it has a defective trigger that is prone to be pre-emptively triggered, and sometimes shot its owner. Doesn't matter if it has been up an anus, or many, though metal front sights tend to prevent that. Ammosexuals rule America, they want us to be their Kemo Sabe, and touch their rod. Fantasy. Ain't gonna happen. Runaway, only one way your ammosexual fantasies are fulfilled. Just saying.
(Score: 0, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday August 11 2022, @08:25PM (1 child)
Spam mod? Poster does not seem to be selling anything. More like how bad reviews disappear from comments.
(Score: -1, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday August 11 2022, @10:34PM
GP didn't even say #FreeAristarchus, either. What gives?
(Score: 3, Funny) by DeathMonkey on Thursday August 11 2022, @04:17PM
Yep. That's why we get a new journal from him every couple days!
(Score: 3, Funny) by DannyB on Thursday August 11 2022, @06:35PM
He is the receiver. He is trying to widen his horizons.
Would a Dyson sphere [soylentnews.org] actually work?
(Score: -1, Offtopic) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday August 11 2022, @03:25AM
ICFI/SEP/IWA-RFC:
Latest primaries tighten Trump's control over Republican Party [wsws.org]
Retrial opens of two men who plotted to kidnap the governor of Michigan in 2020 [wsws.org]
Roger Waters refutes US war propaganda in CNN interview and World Beyond War webinar [wsws.org]
Wildfires erupt across Alaska as climate change drives up temperatures in the Arctic [wsws.org]
United Steelworkers seeks to push through sellout agreements at tire makers Bridgestone, Goodyear and Michelin [wsws.org]
Workers at Harley-Davidson in York, Pennsylvania face second sellout contract vote as union hides the details from its members [wsws.org]
National Labor Relations Board orders United Mine Workers of America to pay $13.3 million to Warrior Met for lost profits incurred during strike [wsws.org]
(Score: -1, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Friday August 12 2022, @06:48PM
You dumb boyo.