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upstart writes:

Techie reported to management for failing to fix a stapler:

On Call The seasons turn, the tides ebb and flow. Just as regularly, each Friday The Register delvers another instalment of On-Call, our reader-contributed tale of another sad constant: IT people being asked to do amazingly dumb things.

This week, meet a reader we'll Regomize as "Phil" who shared a short and sweet tale of his time as a senior systems engineer.

That grand title reflects the skills and qualifications required to tend a sizable fleet of virtualized servers and their respective operating systems.

Which made the support call we recount today all the stranger – because it came from an executive assistant who needed help to fix an electric stapler.

[...] This machine was not even located in the facility wherein Phil toiled. Instead, the call came from another office several states away.

Phil nonetheless tried to help, starting with the – pardon the pun – staple tactics of asking the user if the device was plugged in and then requesting it be turned off and on again.

When that proved ineffective, Phil asked the executive assistant what he felt an IT person hundreds of miles away could do to repair the stapler.

"It plugs into the wall, isn't that what IT fixes?" was the non sequitur reply. Phil's response was to suggest the user contact their facilities department and order a new stapler.

For offering that sensible advice, Phil became the subject of a complaint to corporate that labelled the IT team "unresponsive."

What amusing things have you been asked to do which were nothing to do with your job? For those of you who have worked on help desks, what are your most amusing recollections of problems you have been faced with?

Original Submission