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Armor Plated Tentacle Fish

posted by martyb on Sunday February 10 2019, @11:00PM   Printer-friendly
from the Ph'nglui-mglw'nafh-Cthulhu-R'lyeh-wgah'nagl-fhtagn dept.

RandomFactor writes:

Six new species of catfish covered in bony armor and sporting faces full of tentacles have been discovered in Amazon museums.

Pics of two of the new species, Ancistrus kellerae and Ancistrus patronus, are shown in the article. Additional documentation in the journal (paywall) Zootaxa

The fish were identified from specimens collected in the Guiana Shield region, an area encompassing parts of Venezuela, Colombia and Guyana.

Insightfully, on the purpose of the tentacles, Dr Lesley de Souza from the Chicago Field Museum, who discovered the Lovecraftian delights, speculated

If males have impressive tentacles, females will see them as high quality partners.

No word from Wizards of the Coast on whether they will be added into the next edition Monster Manual.

Original Submission

 
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  • (Score: 2) by MichaelDavidCrawford on Sunday February 10 2019, @11:11PM (13 children)

    by MichaelDavidCrawford (2339) Subscriber Badge <mdcrawford@gmail.com> on Sunday February 10 2019, @11:11PM (#799267) Homepage Journal

    You say that like it's a bad thing.

    --
    Yes I Have No Bananas. [gofundme.com]
    Starting Score:    1  point
    Karma-Bonus Modifier   +1  
    Total Score:   2  

  • (Score: 2) by Arik on Monday February 11 2019, @12:59AM (4 children)

    by Arik (4543) on Monday February 11 2019, @12:59AM (#799298) Journal
    You say that like a man who has never had a parasite^wpartner of the opposite sex.
    --
    If laughter is the best medicine, who are the best doctors?

    • (Score: 2) by MichaelDavidCrawford on Monday February 11 2019, @01:27AM (3 children)

      by MichaelDavidCrawford (2339) Subscriber Badge <mdcrawford@gmail.com> on Monday February 11 2019, @01:27AM (#799309) Homepage Journal

      "Yes," replied Bonita Hatcher.

      We were wed on July 22, 2000 in Pippy Park, in St. John's Newfoundland.

      Your.
      Move.

      --
      Yes I Have No Bananas. [gofundme.com]

      • (Score: 2) by Arik on Monday February 11 2019, @02:07AM

        by Arik (4543) on Monday February 11 2019, @02:07AM (#799325) Journal
        My condolences.

        Your point?
        --
        If laughter is the best medicine, who are the best doctors?

      • (Score: 2) by Arik on Monday February 11 2019, @02:23AM (1 child)

        by Arik (4543) on Monday February 11 2019, @02:23AM (#799333) Journal
        Oh I'm sorry I wasn't trying to be rude.

        Your.
        Point?
        --
        If laughter is the best medicine, who are the best doctors?

  • (Score: 4, Funny) by PartTimeZombie on Monday February 11 2019, @01:10AM (7 children)

    by PartTimeZombie (4827) on Monday February 11 2019, @01:10AM (#799303)

    If males have impressive tentacles, females will see them as high quality partners.

    Never worked for me.

    "Don't touch me with those tentacles" they'd say, also "I don't want to go back to your lair".

    Then the villagers with the pitchforks and torches.

    • (Score: 2) by RandomFactor on Monday February 11 2019, @01:19AM

      by RandomFactor (3682) Subscriber Badge on Monday February 11 2019, @01:19AM (#799304) Journal

      Torches would make ... Catfish and Calamari. Catamari? Calafish?

      --
      В «Правде» нет известий, в «Известиях» нет правды

    • (Score: 2) by krishnoid on Monday February 11 2019, @01:31AM (4 children)

      by krishnoid (1156) on Monday February 11 2019, @01:31AM (#799314)

      You probably just hadn't found the right one [fandom.com] yet. Don't worry, there's lots ... never mind.

      • (Score: 2) by RandomFactor on Monday February 11 2019, @02:08AM

        by RandomFactor (3682) Subscriber Badge on Monday February 11 2019, @02:08AM (#799326) Journal

        Three seasons?

        STAR TREK only got three seasons.

        --
        В «Правде» нет известий, в «Известиях» нет правды

      • (Score: 2) by PartTimeZombie on Monday February 11 2019, @02:34AM (2 children)

        by PartTimeZombie (4827) on Monday February 11 2019, @02:34AM (#799339)

        Good Lord. That might be the strangest link I have clicked on today. Thanks.

        • (Score: 1, Flamebait) by aristarchus on Monday February 11 2019, @03:14AM (1 child)

          by aristarchus (2645) on Monday February 11 2019, @03:14AM (#799358) Journal

          I blame TMB. I suspect he is doing more than Noodling those catfish! Miscegenation!! Oh, Lordy!

          • (Score: 2) by RandomFactor on Monday February 11 2019, @11:28AM

            by RandomFactor (3682) Subscriber Badge on Monday February 11 2019, @11:28AM (#799470) Journal

            Considering the easy misreading as Aristarchus kellerae, this leads to a very disturbing mental image.

            --
            В «Правде» нет известий, в «Известиях» нет правды

    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Monday February 11 2019, @02:25AM

      by Anonymous Coward on Monday February 11 2019, @02:25AM (#799335)

      Then the villagers with the pitchforks and torches.

      If you think they are having it easier...

      Threats to the catfish and their habitats include intensive agriculture, deforestation and chemicals used in gold mining.

      ... lets see how you deal with... say... gold mining.

      (grin)