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Last night Jasmine dumped me. That's two in a week, and a new personal best.

I had felt some distance between us over the last month or so. The biggest sign was slower responses to text messages I would send to her. Normally she would respond within minutes, but it started dragging out to hours, then days. She said she had some busy weeks (and I'm sure she did).

Last time I saw her, I asked her what she wanted in our relationship. I asked if she wanted me to integrate her more into my life. Things like meeting my wife and coming over for dinners every once and a while. She said she didn't know, and that she would think about it.

I guess she thought about it, and decided it was time to move on. I think that she is seeing someone else, and I'm guessing that it's going well and she wants to see where that goes. I understand that. Our relationship was never going to be permanent. I knew I was just a transition between her ex-husband and her getting another 'real' relationship.

We started dating sometime in September, so we dated for 6-7 months. She was a good person and I will miss her. I appreciate the memories we made together, and I will remember her with fondness. I hope she finds what she is looking for. She deserves someone that can offer more than I.

All in all, I would say our relationship was a success, even if the ending hurt a bit. I wish her well.

Godspeed Jasmine. Godspeed.

I am a Firefox user. Firefox has Pocket, which will suggest articles to read when you open a new tab.

Today, one of the articles was: Can We Touch?

I love being touched. One of my favourite things in the world, probably more than sex, is my wife rubbing my back. She uses the tips of her fingers to gently run her fingers up and down and side to side. When she comes across an imperfection like a little bump or tiny scab or whatever they are, she will use her nails and pick it/scrape it off. Sometimes she will look for tiny blackheads and squeeze them, which is quite painful, but I love it. It's gross, but strangely intimate. My girlfriend from High School would do the same thing, so it can't be that uncommon.

It's almost like some sort of primal ritual. You see monkeys grooming each other in a similar way. Searching each other and removing bugs or parasites or whatever else they find.

My Love Language is Physical Touch. I just love being touched. There is a guy at work who is Persian or something and he is really touchy. When you pass him in the hall he might greet you and touch your shoulder. He super friendly, and I find his touch comforting, even if it's a little weird.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this, but the article was about how being touched in the right circumstances can bring health benefits. However, modern society (probably in large part because of the Me Too movement) is moving away from casual touching. I get it. I don't initiate touch hardly ever because it's just too risky. Even on a date when touch is pretty much expected, it can be scary to break the touch barrier. In normal day-to-day life, being touched is a very rare occurrence.

Maybe I'm just feeling a little down/lonely because Annie dumped me earlier this week, but I would love a nice hug right now :)

Annie dumped me last night. She did it very kindly, which I appreciate.

We had a date last night. We went to the library to play a board game, but ended up talking for most of it. We always had great conversation. After that, we went to a local pub and had a drink and a snack. I took her home and she said we need to talk. She basically gave me the 'no spark' excuse.

I don't disagree with her. We had a great time together, but the relationship seemed to be having problems transitioning into a physical one. I feel that a large part of that was because it was impossible to have any time alone together. We were always out in public on our dates (My wife an daughter were home, so I couldn't go there, and she has roommates and never invited me to her place). Kinda sucks, but that's life.

Dating two women simultaneously in addition to my home life was quite a bit. It will be nice to have a tiny more time to myself. I missed having time for myself.

... In other news... I received my Soylent News mousepad yesterday. I ordered it from the online store in the sidebar a week or so ago. Shipping was pretty quick to reach me in the Great White North. The mousepad itself is quite nice. The printing quality is pretty good, and the soft top feels nice. One thing that is different than normal mouse pads is that it is thicker. It is twice as thick as my other mousepads which gives a feeling of comfort and security.

The mouse tracking is perfect, and now that I have it installed at my work desk, my job satisfaction has improved ~15%.

All in all, I am happy with my mousepad and would recommend it to anyone who loves this site.

Today, I'm writing a journal entry about my first job - Burger King.

It was an early summer day and I was out looking for a job. I was only 14 years old but was about to turn 15 (the legal minimum working age) in a couple weeks. I had taken the bus up to a large shopping centre with a stack of resumes. I applied at all the fast food places except for McDonalds. Wendy's, Burger King, KFC, Dairy Queen, Cineplex, Blockbuster. They all got my scantly filled resume.

The first callback was from KFC. I showed up for the interview but ultimately didn't get the job (possibly because I wasn't quite 15 yet). Burger King was second and offered me a position. I accepted their generous offer of $4.50cdn/hour. They gave me a shirt and pair of pants that were probably 8" too large around the waist, and I awaited my first shift.

I was nervous for the first shift, but it went well. I watched training videos for most of it, then started working the broiler. It was actually a pretty neat piece of kit. Frozen burgers and buns would go in one side, and cooked patties and nicely toasted buns came out the other. After a couple weeks, my first paycheque arrived - $50. I remember spending most of it by going to a movie. I really liked having my own money to spend though.

I would end up working there all through high school. I would master the broiler, sandwich prep, counter & drive through. Eventually I would pick up the odd night shift where we would work all night and clean the fryers and broiler while goofing around and smoking cigs in the dining room.

After high school, I decided that I was done with school. I went full time at Burger King and switched locations (I can't remember why). I was now working five 8 hour days per week at Burger King. I was lucky that I worked with some pretty great people, but after a couple months, I couldn't take the boredom and constantly smelling like burger. I reconsidered by position on not liking school and applied for a Computer Engineering Technology course at the local trades college.

Burger king was a pretty good first job, really. I worked with some really cool people and we would have quite a bit of fun. The pay was terrible -- of course -- the work was mind numbing, but it taught me a very, very important lesson: I didn't want to do that for the rest of my life.

Burger King gave me the motivation to go back to school and the money to pay for the first semester. I also met some great people there. It was a great shit job.

What was your first job? What was your starting pay?

When I started my relationship hacking series, I said that I would post both the good and the bad...

I'm not really sure where to start on this journal entry, so I'll just lay it out here. Over the last while (a couple months, maybe), the romantic spark between my wife and I has practically disappeared. We still love each other a lot, we are kind to each other, we are still best friends... Everything is great except the spark is missing -- or at least quite muted.

I'm not quite sure what the cause is. I think that one major factor is that we are tired. My daughter is difficult at times (she's a 2 year old...) and we are tired. It's like we are working two jobs. I work my normal 9-5 job then I go home for the evening shift which involves making/cleaning dinner, a little play time with my daughter, then bedtime. That's all done sometime after 8:00, and by then we are both exhausted. We don't have the energy left to spend quality time together. We'll either watch TV together or she'll watch TV while I sit at my computer.

Meanwhile, I'm dating two different women and seeing them almost once a week each. Those 1-2 nights a week that I'm out is my only time that I'm not either at work or with my daughter. Most Saturdays I'm looking after my daughter alone, and Sunday is the only day we actually spend together as a family. Most of the time on those Sundays we are too tired to plan anything fun and end up catching up on household chores. My wife has a couple weekdays partially to herself. On Mondays Grandma takes my daughter for a few hours, and on Tuesdays she's in daycare so my wife has pretty much the whole day to herself. I guess I'm trying to justify those 1-2 nights per week when I'm gone -- My wife has two weekdays, I have two weeknights. I dunno...

Anyways, that's where we are at. We actually have a date night planned for Saturday night. That's a pretty special treat. We practically never have time away from our daughter. It's the 3rd time since she was born. We are going to get massages and then go out for a steak dinner. We have the entire night alone. Hopefully we can rekindle some of the spark.

I don't know if this is a result of the open relationship or not. On one hand, having a kid means our energy is focused there. By the time that job is done, we are exhausted. On the other hand, my wife sees me going on regular dates with two different women where she is lucky to get a date with me every 6 months. That's hardly fair.

One thing that I think needs to change is that my wife an I need to have more date nights. We need to find a babysitter. We need to carve out quality time together. I also think that her working almost every Saturday is taking it's toll. To me, it feels like I work 6 days a week, and on the 7th we spend it doing chores. We do need the extra money though.

I also don't know if this is a normal thing for new parents. Even before I had my daughter, the romantic connection between my wife and I would ebb and flow. It doesn't seem unreasonable that with the additional stress of raising a child that the romance suffers a bit. I've heard countless stories of deadbedrooms after children.

When it comes to my dating, I obviously really enjoy it. It's MY time. It's time when I can be my own person. Make my own memories and have my own experiences. It's the only time I have that is not either at work or at home. Is it selfish? Maybe, but it's a source of happiness. It gives me the energy and motivation to give 110% effort when I'm at home. I feel confident and attractive -- something that I have struggled with. I honestly think that if it weren't for the dating that I would be struggling with depression.

So that's where I'm at right now. I'd love to hear about your experience with keeping romance alive with children. Do you have tips? Am I being selfish with my dating (probably... but I feel like it's keeping me sane)?

MDC quotes are going in the motd at the bottom of the page rotation starting tomorrow morning if my alarm can wake me up before I have to head out for yet another day of extreme remodeling. Post your favorites here.

[Update: Let's give it until Saturday before they go live, so people can be awake to actually contribute some quotes.]

Somewhere around 4 years ago, I had a coworker named Vic.

At first blush, Vic was a charming man. He was a Brit and was originally hired on as a temp worker to pick up a few tickets while the rest of the team was busy with a major project. Vic seemed to have a good attitude (IMO probably the biggest thing with a new hire), and was eager to learn.

We ended up hiring Vic full time and as the project was winding down I started spending time on him trying to get him trained up and more useful. I quickly realized that training this guy was going to be a goddamn expedition. I had to train him on switching directories in a command window. I was literally starting from zero with him.

I would spend hours sitting beside him teaching him super basic stuff that many non-IT users probably know. After quite a few sessions, it became clear to me that this guy had some sort of learning disability. He was practically untrainable. I would try train him on something and he would take notes on whatever we were doing, but the next day we would be back at square one.

At one point I had assigned him a simple task that should have taken an hour or two to complete. I gave him two weeks to do it. Every day I would ask how is XX coming along? "Oh, good", he would say followed by some frantic clicking. I would tell him if he has any questions, I'm right here.

Finally the two weeks were up and I asked for the completed whatever it was. He had nothing. He had literally nothing to show. I lost it on him. "What the hell have you been doing for the last two weeks? You had literally one thing to do that should have taken a couple hours and you have nothing. I was right there and you asked nothing. What the hell, man?"

That was the last straw for me. This guy was fucking useless. Worse than useless. He would actively fuck stuff up and I would have to fix it. I told management that he was garbage and needed to go and a couple months later he was gone.

That should be the end of the story, but unfortunately that is just the beginning. After being let go, he contacted the team to see if anyone would be willing to give him a reference. The 3 of us politely told him that no, we didn't feel comfortable providing a reference. For a couple months, he would call us every few weeks asking for us to give us a reference we would always refuse. He decided to use one of my coworkers as a reference anyways, which was a little awkward when they called her. She had to politely refuse.

We went a couple years without hearing or thinking about him, until about a month ago when he emails my coworker asking why she won't give him a reference. He also sends her a message on Facebook asking the same. My coworker goes to our manager and HR about this, and together they draft up a reply basically saying I don't feel comfortable providing a reference and furhter inquiries can be made directly to HR.

Well he didn't like that. Since then he has been sending increasingly crazy emails. Here is the most recent:

Mr [corporate legal counsel],

Good Morning.

Finally, I got your attention.

Listen, do not tell me what you are going to do.

ACTION speaks louder than 'empty' words.

Go ahead and take your steps.

Let's head over Queens Bench, we will escalate this matter.

Don't forget now, file for harassment and to top it off, get a restraining order.

Keep smiling and have and good day.

Good Luck :)

[crazy Vic],

What a nutbar... This guy seems to think he is entitled to a good reference. He was not good with computers. He sucked at learning. He was/is not IT material. I don't see what his end game is. Does he expect that after enough harassment we'll all of a sudden be all like "Oh, sorry, yea you actually are a good worker; I'd love to give a reference..."

Fucking guy...

Hipsters and millennials, please learn what irony means. Most of the ways you use it, they're just you being a pretentious little shit not irony. This is irony (and also funny as a motherfucker).

Some people were discussing time travel earlier and if that were possible, whether the traveler would create a new timeline, effectively a parallel universe, by their actions, or whether they would alter their existing universe with what some people consider may be paradoxical results.

One idea that occurred to me would be that a time traveler could go into the past and pick up Albert Einstein. After that they could travel back to a time, say, an hour earlier in Albert Einstein's life, before their previous arrival, and pick him up again. This could be repeated many, many times until they could open an academy full of Albert Einsteins to collaborate on all the big problems in science. Has anyone written a sci fi story about this idea? If not, they should!¹

Depending on how the causality works, it might not be a good idea for them to drop each Albert off at the academy one by one before returning to earlier and earlier moments in his past--because with each new pick-up the slightly older Alberts that were taken to the academy might cease to exist. If so, maybe it would be safer to keep all the Alberts on board the craft until the mission is complete. This might be sufficient to keep them all in the same timeline as the time traveler.

If this thought experiment is coherent then weirdly it points to a source of almost infinite energy. Just pump an oil well dry, then travel back to just enough time before the pumping began to empty it again, repeating this over and over throughout the entire history of the oil well. Weird or what?

^{1. mcgrew, I'm looking at you.}

I like to take a moment to thank all the people that work hard to keep this site up and running.

For many of us, this website is like a second home. There are a lot of people that work hard to keep this site up and running with new content for us to talk about. These people are not being paid, yet do fantastic work.

I'd like to thank The Mighty Buzzard for a lot of the stuff he (presumably ;) ) does behind the scenes that none of us ever hear about or see. The editors do fantastic work by editing stories so they look consistant. This takes a lot of time. These people donate significant amounts of time for us. Take a moment and thank them:

martyb
janrinok
CoolHand
takyon
NotSanguine
charon
Fnord666
chromas
mrpg
FatPhil
cmn32480

I'm sorry if I forgot anyone! It wasn't intentional and I appreaciate whatever you do too!