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A friend has made a preliminary listing for spherical cows, penguins and suchlike on EBay. Due to EBay making PayPal compulsory and PayPal being shiftier than it's co-founder (the serial fraudster and US$5 billion corporate welfare king, Elon Musk), further sales and payment options will definitely be forthcoming.

Anyhow, spherical critters are currently available via EBay user spherical_critter_emporium and one random plushie is available for £10 with free global shipping. All proceeds after taxes, fees and materials go towards food and drink for whoever attends a weekly London geek meeting which you are cordially invited to attend. If the spherical critters are popular then it will be a free evening of food, drink and geekery.

After some back-and-forth, the text of the listing is as follows:-

♪♫ They're lumpy,
They're bumpy,
They're easily squashed,
Damaged and lost... ♫♪

♪♫ Spherical Critters!
Spherical Critters!
'Round and 'round
the absurdity goes!
Spherical Critters!
Spherical Critters!
Why we love them,
Nobody knows! ♫♪

These spherical animals not perfectly spherical nor are they living animals. They have a diameter of approximately 18cm (7 inches) but are easily squashed like a cushion. They are made from synthetic sponge and short synthetic fur. They have a small bounce to them which makes them surprisingly suitable for keepy-uppy or hackisack type amusement despite being smaller than a football and significantly larger than a hackisack.

Spherical cows are based on an old physics joke: "Milk production at a dairy farm was low, so the farmer wrote to the local university, asking for help from academia. A multi-disciplinary team of professors was assembled, headed by a theoretical physicist, and two weeks of intensive on-site investigation took place. The scholars then returned to the university, notebooks crammed with data, where the task of writing the report was left to the team leader. Shortly thereafter the physicist returned to the farm, saying to the farmer, 'I have the solution, but it works only in the case of spherical cows in a vacuum.'" Further spherical cow jokes can be found on the Internet including spherical steak searing pans and the Uncyclopedia's lunar migration cycle of spherical cows. We also recommend Rollin' Wild, a series of short animations which were shown in IMAX cinemas. (The spherical cheetah is particularly funny. Likewise for the scene with the cowshed.)

For quite a while, it has been possible to purchase spherical cow tshirts and cross stitching. However, spherical cows in any form have been in short supply. Therefore, we purchased stereotypical black and white splotchy Holstein cow print fur and began making spherical cow stuffed toys/plushies. This rapidly expanded into spherical tigers, spherical leopards, spherical ladybirds/ladybugs, spherical sheep (black or white), spherical penguins and, by special request, spherical Sully print which definitely isn't Sully from Monsters Inc because it is significantly darker.

Each of the patterned spherical critters is unique because it is cut from a different offset of patterned fabric. Regardless, examples shown are representative of future supply. If sources of fur fabric differ significantly then we will update pictures prior to sale.

Spherical critters are likely suitable for small children nominally of three years old, but please use your own judgement if buying for children, and ask us any questions you have. Each item is lovingly and ethically home made by genuine physicists from five pieces of car washing sponge purchased from Poundland and two pieces of synthetic fur typically purchased from Dalston Mill Fabrics and double stitched with rip-stops using the coarsest pound shop thread that money can buy. (Leopard print and Sully print was purchased from EBay seller midtexltd.) No innards are smaller than than 50 cubic centimetres (3 cubic inches) and the basic design has no outer piece which is significantly smaller than half of the surface area.

By special request, spherical critters are available in kit form so that you can sew your own spherical stuffed toys. Please ask us to list the design of your choice with or without scissors, needles and/or thread. All kits are supplied with cutting template (whether it is required or not) so that you can advance your skills with the least impediment. We typically list a pre-cut, pre-joined spherical tiger sewing kit supplied with sponge filling because it is easiest to complete. Also by special request, spherical critters are available with eyes, ears, tails, cow bells and/or other adornments. Please ask us to list any requested variations. However, please note that each addition will typically be £2 extra and eyes for stuffed toys may be more. With additions, they may not be safe for children.

Bulk discounts are available (contact us) and we challenge you to purchase unusual quantities so that we sphere pack them into unusual shaped parcels. For example, 10 critters will pack nicely into a tetrahedral pyramid. Indeed, with 41 critters in stock [at time of writing], we currently have the world's largest tetrahedral pyramid of spherical stuffed toys (see first picture). This could be yours for a reasonable price. You may laugh now but you'll be laughing even harder when you're avalanched by furry balls!

To keep any synthetic stuffed toy in optimal condition, occasionally brush lightly with a wig brush. Wash stains by applying diluted detergent to surface only. Do not soak. Do not machine wash. Do not use hair dryer. Do not place in microwave oven. Keep away from naked flame. Do not fold, spindle or mutilate. Ingress of water to middle of stuffed toy encourages mold. Excessive heat causes synthetic fur to curl or melt.

Unfortunately, due to the use of bright yellow synthetic sponge and relatively short synthetic fur, designs with significant quantities of light fur (sheep, penguin) may appear discoloured from some angles. This may be corrected in future if we can find uncoloured synthetic sponge or alternative filling at a similar price. Please let us know how we can improve this product or any other product.

Also, my friend currently holds an informal world record for a spherical critter tetrahedral pyramid with 35 spheres. We're now working towards 120 unless stock diminishes.

Edit 1: EBay listing with choice of critter.

South Korea's booming 'webtoons' put Japan's print manga on notice

Should Japanese manga publishers, who have for years invested first and foremost in developing print content, jump on the webtoon bandwagon to strengthen their outreach to a foreign, tech-savvy audience?

Opinions among industry insiders and experts are mixed, but at least for Hideki Egami, a former editor at leading publisher Shogakukan, the answer is a definitive yes.

“Sales for comic magazines in Japan have long been trending downward — we don’t know how much further the domestic market for print manga will shrink,” Egami said.

“Japanese publishers are now at a stage where they can’t overlook the need for going digital and overseas. … Webtoons, I think, are the most reasonable way forward.”

Vertically optimized

Unlike Japanese manga, which in most cases are first marketed for a print audience and only subsequently promoted online via apps, webtoons cater to digital device users from the get-go: Their format has already been optimized for personal computers or smartphones.

Webtoons typically scroll vertically and are in full color, as opposed to traditional manga, which are often black and white and read horizontally. Once they spread on popular manga apps in Japan, the digital South Korean comics immediately attracted a youth following here.

Soylent News has a racism problem. The problem is not so much the racists, though we do seem to have plenty of those in the comments, and I offer all of them a virtual punch in the face. The real problem is the inability to discuss racism. For example, our most recent inability resulted in the mod-banning of the TMB, just because he is Native American. This is not right.

So in the interest of raising the level of discourse here on SoylentNews, I thought it might be a good idea to submit some recent studies and confessions on exactly this topic. But my efforts have been rebuffed, with great vehemence and vitrol. For example, one rejection reads:

We're sorry, your submission "My regrettable libertarian romance: I rebounded from my experimental phase, but many don't" was declined for the following reason:
My regrettable liberal romance: I rebounded from my experimental phase, but many don't

The editors felt it inappropriate for them to correct the issue themselves.

Well, duh! the prior submission was all about the Dunning-Kruger Effect, so of course they felt it was inappropriate. And who the hell of the Eds thinks I am a liberal? Are we politically illiterate on SN? Θεέ μου.

The submission, in all its rejected glory, can be found here: My regrettable libertarian romance: I rebounded from my experimental phase

And the next rejection was even more, well, childish? What are the Eds afraid of? That they might be racists? (They are.) and not know it? (They don't.) But that is no reason to reject a submission from the Pew Research, pointing out that racists don't know they are racists, unless they know they are racists, and intentionally seeking to draw our attention away from it? No reason given for this rejection. Hmmm. Here it is:
The most racist people are also the least likely to recognize their own racism

And then, we have a follow up to our TMB disturbing study, what with the facts and all, that still offends the eds. Rejection notice:

We're sorry, your submission "Americans See Advantages and Challenges in Country’s Growing Racial and Ethnic Diversity" was declined for the following reason:
"whites are more likely than blacks to say diversity is very good for the country"

The reason is a quote from the Fine Article? I do not understand! Are the Eds saying that the submission does not make some point that they think I am making? Or is the fact that most "whites" are not racist means that the Eds of SoylentNews are not racist? Puzzling Evidence, per David Byrne and Talking Heads. Original (disappeared quickly, this is the point, these submissions did not languish in the queue for days, they were killed in a matter of hours: why? Truth hurts?):
Americans See Advantages and Challenges in Country’s Growing Racial and Ethnic Diversity . Of course, the entire point of the submission was to point out that racists are a minority, a white Republican minority, in America. We cannot be talking about that on SN, Richard Spencer and Milo would not be happy.

Finally, a submission pointing out that, well, read the title:
Nearly half of white Republicans say it bothers them to hear people speaking foreign languages

Some may be aware, if they peruse the queue, that I on occasion submit submissions from places other than America or its lapdog, Britain, in languages that Americans find opaque and disturbing. And of course, this is most prevalent among the least educated, and therefore Republican, Americans. Really, we should internationalize SoylentNews. We have Unicode, and we can't use it? Why? The only explanation is, yes: Racism. So before you say, "I am not in favor of Racism, but . . ." , allow me to say, "μπορεί τα γαϊδουράκια να βρουν το δρόμο τους στην πισίνα γονιδίων σας."

Even my submission where I purposely made no comments, no editorializing, no nothing, rejected! Must be racism!

********Update! Yet another rejection! This one is Is there life after the Alt-right Apparent answer, from the eds, is no. Nothing but death, destruction, darkness, nihilism, hatred, racism, misogyny, pro-business attitudes, and The Dark Side. Once you go alt-right, you'll never be able to be a normie again. Kinda the point, eh? But some of us reject the premise. Come back from the Dark Side, Soylent! It is not too late for you! We'll burn you in a Jedi funeral! Promise.

_______________
And this:https://soylentnews.org/submit.pl?op=viewsub&subid=33637
It was going to be an alt-right white wedding! (yeah, right!)

Iranian President Hassan Rouhani announced Wednesday that his country was taking steps to halt its compliance with elements of a landmark nuclear accord, in a move that appeared certain to aggravate tensions with the United States.

In a televised speech, Rouhani said that Iran would hold on to stockpiles of excess uranium and heavy water used in its nuclear reactors. He set a 60-day deadline for new terms to the nuclear accord, after which Tehran would resume higher uranium enrichment.

In November, the United States reimposed sanctions that have strangled Iran’s oil and banking sectors as well as its foreign trade. The sanctions came after the Trump administration’s decision to withdraw from the pact that Iran negotiated with world powers in 2015 and that curbed its nuclear program in exchange for widespread sanctions relief.

Iran had been complying fully with the terms of the deal even after the Trump administration unilaterally withdrew last year, according to the United Nations’ nuclear watchdog, the International Atomic Energy Agency.

Iran announces it will stop complying with parts of landmark nuclear deal

Great job Trump!

There are many reasons. Who owns who is unclear.

Some people in a rural area say they keep a cat because: "it keeps the vermin down".

What does that mean exactly?

1. the cat reduces the population of vermin?

2. the cat has a remarkable ability to not vomit up the vermin?

The google definition of vermin, and especially the google images page for vermin, would suggest that meaning 2 is what is intended by that "keeps the vermin down" phrase.

Third-Gen Ryzen Threadripper Zen 2 CPUs Mysteriously Vanish From AMD's 2019 Roadmap + Tom's

Delaying Threadripper 3 might make a lot of sense. If Ryzen 3 doubles the max core count to 16, and Epyc 2 doubles it to 64, Threadripper 2 will continue to have up to 32 cores. It is unknown what core count Threadripper 3 will have. They could use 4-8 chiplets to provide 32-64 cores. Most high-end users probably don't need it right now, Threadripper 2 is still a better value than Intel, and AMD could just cut Threadripper 2 prices to get rid of the inventory.

AMD Navi GPU Rumors: Navi 20 Based Radeon Instinct Delayed To Q1 2020, 7nm Navi Can’t Reach 7nm Vega Clocks, Alleged Radeon RX Navi Specifications

What is known is that Navi will still be based on AMD's Graphics Core Next (GCN) design which is showing its age. It effectively has a 4,096 stream processor limit.

PS5 will include a Navi GPU, and the GPU or SoC will apparently include hardware acceleration for ray tracing. It's not known if desktop Navi GPUs will have this capability.

From the article:

Navi is meant to be the last GCN based GPU design by AMD and as such, should be the most optimized version of the architecture we have seen to date with multiple improvements being delivered. However, the report says that early Navi samples are not even able to match Vega 20 clock speeds and the Navi GPUs which can meet the frequency targets are reportedly facing major thermal and power consumption issues. We heard similar rumors for the Vega 10 and Vega 20 parts before they launched and those rumors turned out to be very close to the real image when the cards finally landed into consumer’s hands.

It may be possible that AMD is trying to uplift the performance by increasing frequency while sacrificing thermals and power efficiency. That is pretty much what Radeon VII was but it’s still much early to say if that’s the truth as the cards won’t be available until next year.

Worst case scenario: Navi is lackluster due to being GCN-based and power consumption issues, and its first non-GCN successor ends up lackluster due to a lack of optimizations.

A leaked/alleged lineup is given in the article showing Radeon VII or better performance starting at $430, and RTX 2070 performance at $330. If that holds true, Navi could be a price/performance win over Nvidia, just not as good as it could have been.

A parody website with embarrassing photos of Joe Biden is outranking his official campaign page on Google

The internet snafu suggests the Biden campaign is having early difficulty with its digital operation. That could pose trouble for the 76-year-old as he competes in a field that has already proven to be savvy with new tools for online outreach and fundraising.

The problem has also emerged despite the Biden campaign's prolific spending on Google.

An online tracker maintained by the progressive digital advertising firm ACRONYM shows the Biden campaign has spent more than $360,000 on Google platforms, racking up more spending on the site than all the other candidates in the crowded field except Sen. Bernie Sanders and Pete Buttigieg, the mayor of South Bend, Indiana.

Google search

joebiden.info

joebiden.com

The informative parody website doesn't come with an annoying popup like the official one does.

The parody website presents a number of Biden's past positions:

In 1996, Senator Joe Biden voted for the Defense of Marriage Act which defined marriage as between a man and a woman. This law also prevented states from recognizing same sex marriages.

Senator Joe Biden voted for the Violent Crime Control and Law Enforcement Act of 1994 which initiated the “3 Strikes and You’re Out” policy which has resulted in many people spending life sentences in jail for minor crimes.

In 1982, Senator Joe Biden initially voted for a constitutional amendment which would have allowed states to overturn Roe v. Wade – the Supreme Court decision which legalized abortion.

In the 1970s Joe Biden stated that “I have become convinced that busing is a bankrupt concept.” He actively worked to oppose busing as a way to desegregate schools. Biden even wrote letters seeking the support of people who thought schools should be segregated by race.

Senator Joe Biden, who at the time was chair of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, voted for the resolution to authorize military involvement in Iraq. The Iraq war resulted in the death of 4,424 US military members and cost taxpayers $2.4 trillion.

Harsher mandatory minimum sentences for drug use, civil asset forfeiture without a conviction, and imposing death penalty for drug related murders – this is Joe Biden’s legacy. He voted for both the Anti-Drug Abuse Act of 1986 and its 1988 counterpart and claimed George H. Bush’s war on drugs was “not tough enough, bold enough, or imaginative enough.”

Daily Show segment from 2015 (5m5s)

Previously: Joe Biden's #MeToo Adventure Continues

So there it is. janrinok did not respond directly to my challenge, like a gentleman, but he is English, so some accommodation is in order.

But he did, or, at least he might have, reigned in his dog, (and, yes, I know that the proper word is "reined", but there was precipitation) and with that admission, I consider the matter to be partially closed.

In the future, I expect aristarchus submissions to be given equal consideration with all other submissions, and not be dismissed without cause, hint, or license. And I expect Editors to be able to distinguish alt-right agitprop, and islamophobic hysteria, and Runaway submissions when they fit one of those categories,

But, and let me make this clear, the next time there is such an affront to justice and myself, or any other honorable Soylentil, I will demand satisfaction in blood. Or ouzo. Either way.

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Followed immediately by this:

We're sorry, your submission "Perché l’associazione ultra cattolica di Bannon vuole una scuola di sovranisti in Italia:" was declined for the following reason:
Submissions must be in English - https://soylentnews.org/faq.pl?op=editorial. -- JR

Do you not realize, denizen of the Fairy Isles to the West, that to a Greek Italian is English? Americans are the problem. Monolingual troglodytes who Steve Bannon is going to bambozzle.
----------------------
Further followed by a newsworthy submission:
https://soylentnews.org/submit.pl?op=viewsub&subid=33468
Rejected by takyon with the words:

We're sorry, your submission "2 from white supremacist group plead guilty in Charlottesville rally violence" was declined for the following reason:
nope -takyon

Seems nothing has changed. #freearistarchus!!!!

_______
And I would be remiss if I did not profusely thank Azuma Hazuki for her invaluable service as a second in this affair. Without her, the matter would not have ended as amicably as it did. ありがとう、お姉さん.

I heard someone talking about The English Channel?

Then I realized. My cable package does not include The English Channel!

Is there somewhere it is available streaming online? (for free, of course, because socialism, and/or entitlement)

If I lived in England and did not get The English Channel I would be so mad I would swim South all the way to France!

(for extra credit one could try swimming North all the way to France)