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https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Belle_Gunness

I heard of this story from the Bathroom Reader series of books (not a shareholder, lol).

She killed for insurance, etc., and seems to maybe have gotten away with it!

Hate typing on mobile... Keeping it short.

The raving, foaming-at-the-mouth, ideologically-driven Conservatives, having all but ruined the state education system, virtually rendered social housing impotent, all but made access to lawyers impossible for everyone except the rich, gone back on their environmental commitments, gerrymandering the electoral constituencies (in their favour), ridden roughshod over the House of Lords, sent sick and dying people to work for large, rich corporations for free, are now about to eviscerate the National Health Service.

Stewart Lee has a very insightful column in the Guardian.

He gets in the Noam Chomsky one, "Defund, make sure things don’t work, people get angry, you hand it over to private capital.

Why should money be used to do good for people? Money should only ever be used to make more money!

If the sick needed treating, the Market would see to their treatment. This is just the Market's way of ridding decent, honest, hard-working people of the dead wood who are just holding us back!

Is that clear?

Give him a blast. Make that hair fly.

Today I started learning Javascript. This isn't the first time I've tried but I think I'll do it for real this time. Previously I only learned as much as I needed to plug in someone else's script. I also tried to read O'Reilly's "Learning Javascript" but got bored with it. It's an informative book but the writing isn't compelling.

I met a fellow consultant today who said he'd give my contact info to a friend of his who is getting more work than he can handle. He also said that with my existing experience, I should get into DevOps. I'd had the impression that that was more for junior developers but he asserted it was for senior people like me.

My existing website Portland Software Development and Consulting is quite spartan. I had the idea that the simple "design" would associate me with the experts, but an older, wiser colleague says that I should make it more attractive. I plan to use my Javascript to implement responsive design, that is, to make the same pages work well on mobile devices, desktops and laptops.

Just now I added "DevOps" to my list of services, and "JavaScript" to my list of languages. I also moved Python closer to the head of the list. I don't really know JS or DevOps yet but expect I will by the time they show up in the search engines.

I learn best by doing; today someone recommended I learn just a little bit of JS from the tutorials, then Google for everything else I need to do. To that end I am writing Conway's Game of Life in Javascript. It's not online yet, not until I get it actually doing something, but what little I've done so far has taught me a few things.

The consultant I spoke to today took me very seriously. That felt good, real good - though I didn't tell him I was homeless. I don't really look homeless, I try to keep my appearance professional. I don't always succeed but that's what I aim for.

There is an abundance of media and content available online, and in meatspace. This website contributes, and everyone on this site is a part of that. There are 15 stories this site will publish today, none I have touched. We will likely see several hundred comments and dozens of discussions. Many comments will be insightful or interesting, others will be funny, some will be less well received. There will be a small handful of journals like this one.

I try to contribute positively to this site. Perhaps not as much as I could or should, but I would rather do it well and have a constructive experience. When editing stories, I genuinely try to keep a wide scope of interests considered and choose quality submissions. These may not be the most commented on, but my intention is to publish content that is informative or interesting regardless of my own perspective on the subject.

However, most of the content I see and consume is certainly more of the entertainment variety. This is very different from the attitude I have on this site.

I would love to create content that is entertaining, having been in various bands and musical projects for many years in my teens and early 20's. I don't have any concern really over the number of people that would or have seen and enjoyed the music or other content. Some of my favorite musicians have extremely small audiences and short 'careers', it's about the art and expression, creating something from the imagination. It's still sad to see quality music being ignored regardless.

This is the problem. I'd much rather make serious content, to borrow a phrase 'stuff that matters'. People can and do make art and entertaining content far better than I could.

The state of journalism in the entire world is a shambles. There are so many events that need reviewing, context is always missing, contradictory reports are ignored. Every outlet with any reach with full-time 'journalists' are under the control of commercial interests and/or an incoherent bureaucratic mess of government oversight, perhaps wrapped in the guise of independence from government. There are people, by themselves and working with others to improve the situation. The work of people like Tom Secker[1] and Pearse Redmond[2] are quite outstanding examples of independent research and journalism on very important events. The community here seems to be trying. We don't have a big community though, much like Tom and Pearse, the shared perspectives rarely travel beyond a small community.

Options are available to even make a living from writing, I could do it tomorrow. But, I would be writing press releases and other commercial content generation for 'mainstream' consumption. It's not impossible to get work reporting on and for the public sector or political institutions. I can interpret the data, word things however you want to misrepresent it, or direct emphasis to the irrelevant, but that doesn't mean it's a worthwhile or constructive way to spend time and other resources.

Thankfully i've found myself in the situation where my employment is quite flexible, it's very hard work often, but I am not beholden to an employer. I have my morals and ethics and do business a certain way, which is honesty, there is no game. Working for multinationals and smaller companies who are staffed by people with no moral compass, intentionally or by process, i've been there. It's something I can't tolerate or be involved in anymore. A cog in the machine is not the place for me.

There are so many people now, more than ever creating art and writing for a living or as a major part of their lives. Perhaps now just the human experience. I don't feel like I really need to be a part of it, i'd like to spend my energy on the more tangible. It could be amazing, doing something i'm passionate about on a more spiritual sense, being able to focus on the creativity or reporting on current events.

In an ideal world, i'd love to do it all. Entertain, inform and build, be productive. Now though, I don't feel like i'm doing any of that.

The opportunities are numerous, but the downsides are immense. None of the opportunities, which would keep food on my plate, are actually positively contributing to society. Forgetting the aforementioned issues with 'writing' for a living. I can build more houses through subcontracting based on debt [public/private/foreign], for people to buy with more debt, to make sure house prices keep going up so the average home in London costs £1,000,000 by 2020 but the average wage stays around the £25,000 mark. Or it's build a broker/service company, with long winded service contracts and subcontractor agreements to extract as much money as possible from clients and contractors with as minimal obligation, none of it direct, all wrapped up in a nice advertising campaign of bullshit.

It's not about government regulation, it's about systemic corruption of government and the quarterly report obsessed private sector distorting any sense of fair trade and any semblance of actual investigative journalism or reporting. The regulations on smaller businesses don't actually matter as much. The access to discretionary enforcement of the regulations, minimal/zero risk access to multi-million funding, government grants and tailored projects for the 'big' everything. That's before we get onto the just straight up misinformation people in marketing and sales tell as part of their jobs. That's getting closer to the core of the problem.

Back a little more on topic before this hits a thousand words… Bearing all this in mind, I'm lost as to what to do. I'd love to contribute more to this site, it would be a dream to write every day. But really, shouldn't I be building homes for people, not houses for a bank? Shouldn't I be growing food for myself and my neighbors rather than installing some ambient lighting systems in a Michelin star restaurant?

The opportunity is there to make a positive contribution to society, but how can I find a direction?

[1] Tom Secker's work can be found at:
Spy Culture
Investigating the Terror
Boiling Frogs Post
[2] Pearse Redmond's work can be found at:
Porkins Policy Review

Last night I met a lovely woman for drinks after work. We had great conversation, she was cute, and I think that both of us felt that spark. She took the bus downtown to work, so I offered to drive her home. Anyways, long story short she doesn't think that she is interested in dating a poly guy. I think that be being married was the final straw for her.

I don't really understand now why she went on the date in the first place. Maybe just a curiosity thing. It's pretty sad. Having a spark on the first date is pretty rare, so It's disappointing that it didn't work out. I understand and respect her position though. It sucks though.

On another topic, I started reading a new book called 'Open'. It was recommended to me by Kobo, and I thought I'd try it out. It's a story about a woman and her journey to an open marriage. I don't know if I can finish it though. It makes me feel sick to my stomach.

The book is written from a female perspective. It's basically about her sex life from teenager age onwards. Reading it makes be feel extreme envy. The thing I can't handle is how she is desired. I'm only 3 chapters in, and this woman has been hit on by 2 other women and countless men.

In my entire life, I've had two experiences where I have been 'hit' on my women. The first, was when I was maybe 16. It was at a party, and this girl literally fell into my lap and started making out with me. The shocking thing is that she wasn't drunk. I admire the courage that it must have took for her to do that. It was one of the best moments of my life.

The second time was at work, riding the elevator. Some girl said I was hot. Twice. I wasn't attracted to her, but I'll be damned if it didn't make me feel great.

Reading the book reminded me how little attention I actually get. I rarely/never catch girls checking me out. I certainly never get cat-called. I never really get the feeling that some random girl is flirting with me (although I am really dense when it comes to that stuff).

Women seem to be inundated with sexual attention, while men almost never get any sort of attention. I read somewhere that women rate 80% of men below average attractiveness. A woman can put on a low cut top and a short skirt and have men drooling all over her. Men (or at least I) don't have that ability. I can't go get some 'sexy' clothes and get attention from the opposite sex.

When I think about that imbalance, it makes me feel like shit. It makes me feel (even more) unsexy. Why am I not worth the attention of the other sex? Am I unattractive? Sometimes (frequently) I just feel invisible to the opposite sex.

Since this site has a primarily male readership, I'm curious to hear how others here feel? Do you ever feel sexy or desired? Is it just me that feels this way?

_{[Not a big news story but one that set me off ("I've been writing a lot today but all I got was this lousy journal entry"). My own thoughts on velvet revolutions maybe could have made a journal entry but meh the stuff I've got is too obvious. There's other stuff too (the US transsexual the cops murdered (white btw, some ppl must be wearing very strong sunglasses), China reverting to full-on communist dystopia, "Problems of Democracy" (named as a nod to the old US DoD/CIA publication "Problems of Communism"), and something titled "Sinking the Ocean") but all are too complicated and/or unfinished; been hammering away instead of doing sensible things (like checking the 9 SN notifications and 60 or so unread stories, and I'm beat now).]}

Quoting the RT news item (might be good to read it all) quoting Varoufakis:

“The European Union is disintegrating, and it is doing so quite fast,” he [Varoufakis] said. “The process of depoliticizing decision making at the heart of Europe, at our core European institutions” has been ongoing for decades, he said, adding that the EU’s “bureaucratic, technocratic decision-making process” has amounted to “authoritarianism.”

I've realized (some time after writing the following but before posting it) that Varoufakis more than likely knows all of this —he's a smart guy afaik— and maybe he thinks he can do better or add a touch to it or promulgate the core of it more widely into the left. Good for him (and maybe everybody else too), not so much in the quote but in the rest of the linked article he gets the main points right and I'm not going to stand in his way but I'll still say what I say (and I think others would too but that's an assumption although a fairly secure one).

The movement Varoufakis is asking for in the article already exists, it's called the alternative right (or new right) and he's more than welcome to join (I know he partially has of sorts with the Syriza & ANEL combo thing) but he has to leave behind his fear of walls because proper walls would and should keep the roof up above our heads :)

I know he wouldn't be the first.

I know of a person who at least claims to be communist/marxist who votes for the same alternative right party as me (a light™ version though, but decidedly not anything like an old-school conservative party and not particularly ideological). The communist is only voting for them because of their stance against immigration. There should be a lot more like him by now. In fact many of the alternative right parties are very much centrist or even leftist on some issues, much more so than one would think from eating the garbage served by MSM as well as all the competing non-alt-right parties.

The simple general summary of alt-right politics is: "people want to keep what they had and which they and those before them fought for, thank you very much".

That might sound conservative but the "conservatives" (in Europe as in the US) are rotting away what should be preserved (the puns are illustrative as well as true so I'll leave them there). Issues like "immigration", and/or welfare, and/or tuition fees, and/or international treaties all point back to the central issue of sovereignty which in turn is tightly coupled with freedom and actual democracy: rule by the people (which is what Varoufakis is asking for).

Also note that the "conservatives" (Republicans, Tories, whatever) are doing the damage together with their "supposed enemies" the social democrats (or still worse: "christian" democrats) and labor movements, even Corbin (and maybe not Yaroufakis either) doesn't seem to get exactly what is going on yet —that's ideology for you.

When you realize they're all operating way past their sell-by date (and they don't keep) you vote alternative. Sucks for those in the US, they've got none but have to make do with weird ones be it Green ("yuck") or Libertarian ("need more meds") or maybe Trump as a King Kong Godzilla hybrid.

_{[feel free to skip over these personal tidbits]
While I've never been voting to the left myself I've long long ago voted for a socially and partially financially libertarian party before I figured out they (locally, but later on the same happened in Britain) were predominantly idiots and liars pandering to the powers-that-be.}

_{Sure I was a better person back then, perhaps. And I was an even better person when I was a four year old. That's what experience, knowledge, and insight should do to people if you ask me; they should wise up. The fact they don't always do is quite depressing for the rest of us but oh boy must they live charmed lives or be incredibly dense. Sorry to any insulted septuagenarians (I know at least one which should be deeply insulted and rightfully so) but it's true :P
[personal stuff done with]}

Anyway the EU in the form as it exists will not, can not, and should not continue to exist. It is more broken that functional and it has created bigger problems than it solved. It has much more in common with nazism and international/soviet communism and their shared feverish and quite deranged dreams of "unity" (under their boot) than anything remotely democratic. The sensible things can be done without them on a completely voluntary opt-in basis. Forced "cooperation" isn't, and neither is forced "charity".

_{Alternative Internet Archive link. I notice that some people are doing various things to attempt to secure documentation and others again are talking openly about lists of people and actions. A single particularly offensive incident but there are tens of thousands more "hidden" away (even if Rotherham should be unique which is kind of a wild assumption).}

The EU is the failure of the totalitarians (authoritarians is too weak a description for them) no matter what political color and ideology they hide behind. We got there quicker than the US that's all.

Now if only more actual nazis, few as they are, could realize that the powers they imagine fighting themselves against are the marriage of the descendants of the old nazis and and the old commies, and if they (as well as the far left) could in such a manner realize their own folly then we would be even better off here in the alt-right camp.

The door is still open for now.

Sort of off topic: if anyone has any particularly insightful to say (or link to) regarding the velvet revolutions at the fall of the Soviet empire then I'm all ears, especially if it's anything non-obvious. Living through it in western Europe (as well as as before it) only goes so far and a few years later I moved elsewhere out of Europe for some years before returning so there might even be things in the aftermath that I've completely missed (although I don't think so).

The situation in Europe is already violent (still mostly from the "refugees") so it won't be exactly the same but there are some similarities, maybe, if the governments know what's good for them.

P.s. fuck Turkey & pipsqueak "Adolf" Erdogan ("Hitler in falsetto"), I hope Russia nukes him (I know they won't, and yes I'm exaggerating) :)

I've taken the liberty of setting up a folding@home team for Soylent News. In case you aren't familiar with folding@home, it's a distributed computing project that simulates protein folding in an attempt to better understand diseases such as Alzheimer’s and Huntington's.

There is more information on the project here, which explains it much better than I could.

Clients are available for Linux, OSX, and even Windows (if you swing that way), so come join our botnet!

That Other Site's team is ranked at 1817, so we've got some catching up to do.

On a personal note, my Dad carries the gene markers for Huntington's disease, and will eventually succumb to it. Research like this is very helpful for understanding, and hopefully developing treatments for it.

tl;dr Our Soylent News team ID is 230319

I'll have "some word" in a day or two about my housing. My mental health clinic has six slots, I'm #1 on the clinic's list, but some entirely different agency is determining whether I qualify.

However I don't even remember how many times I've been in the psych hospital in the last five years. In October 2010 I totalled my beloved Chevy Prizm in a 100 MPH suicide attempt. I'm also not real sure how many times I've been in jail.

Washington is starting to follow Utah's "Housing First" strategy which is predicated on that it is far cheaper to house the homeless than to put us in jail.

If I get housing, my understanding is that it will be in Vancouver's Lincoln Place, which is a brand-new, five million dollar apartment building. Housing just me all by my lonesome has already set the government back $120,000.

Really I would be completely cool to continue living in a tent, were it not that someone slashed up my tent with a knife, then tried to steal my new guitar.

WHILE I WAS SLEEPING IN THE TENT.

I grabbed what I could carry with me then split the scene completely.

I stashed that stuff at a friend's house, and will go back tomorrow in hopes that the other stuff is still there; mostly clothes, also a pair of running shoes. My leather Clark's have a two-inch tear where the upper of my right shoe meets the sole; Dorian's Shoe Repair says they can fix it for fifteen bucks, mom will cover the cost but I'll need some other shoes to wear until I get the Clark's back.

If my other shoes have been ripped off, I have a really nice pair of work boots in my storage locker.

Someone from Social Security called my mother regarding my SSI claim, but wanted to know my phone number. Mom wouldn't give it to them but she emailed me the clerk's number. I'm puzzled they didn't already have it, but maybe they tried to call me a month ago when my phone was out of minutes.

SSI takes "60 to 90 days" to approve; 90 days would be Real Soon Now. If I get it, that would be a little over $700 per month; $210 of it - 30% - would be paid for my housing, but I only have to pay if I actually have income.

As far as I know my consulting contract will still happen, but it's been delayed while their other coders figure out some manner of problem. The client and I have been exchanging occasional emails, as they ask technical questions and I answer them.

They all strike me as good people, but I'm concerned that the problem their other coders face could be insurmountable. In that case not just I but my client would be SOL.

I'm sorry I can't give any details as I am under NDA. I expect I can tell you that I'd be writing a driver that has to do with storage.

In late January, someone got into my tent while I was away for the day
and stole the Bluetooth Headphones that Mom gave me for Christmas,
also my guitar. That really hurt.

I posted about the burglary on Facebook. Adam Kravitz and Ren Autrey,
two formerly homeless people who work to help the homeless, arranged
for some complete stranger to give me a guitar absolutely free. It's
a real nice guitar.

Day before yesterday someone slashed my tent with a knife - the way it
was cut it was clear it was done with a knife. But they didn't get
inside the tent itself.

Yesterday morning when I was asleep, they came back and slashed open
another side of the tent, reached through and grabbed that new guitar.
I woke up and shouted some bad words. They dropped the guitar then
ran away.

I had a bunch of food stolen at my first camp overlooking the
Columbia. I don't feel safe anywhere.

I decided to abandon my tent. I packed what I could in my backpack
then went downtown and emailed my friend Rod Schmidt, to ask if I
could stash some of my stuff at his house. I haven't heard back from
him yet but I expect he'll be OK with it. If he is, I'm going to go
back to what's left of my tent for a second load.

Last night I won the lottery to get a bed at the Portland Rescue
Mission. That was nice, I also got a hot shower and was able to
shave, but I have to enter the lottery every evening - I won't always
get a bed.

If I have to stay up all night on the streets, I can sleep during the
day at Right 2 Dream Too, more commonly known as "The Tent Camp".
It's a homeless shelter operated by the homeless themselves. The city
tried to run them out for illegal camping, R2D2 sued the city - I
don't know just what for - and the city settled on the condition that
R2D2 move to the other side of the Willamette from Oldtown. However,
R2D2 hasn't yet moved.

I'm expecting to get housing at Lincoln Place in Vancouver soon, it
will be a small studio apartment with a private bathroom and a
kitchenette. It's a new building, it is expected to open in a couple
weeks. My mental health clinic told me they have six slots, and that
I am the first in line.

I actually enjoyed living in a tent but I don't feel that there's
anywhere that I could camp that I would be safe.

I'm expecting to get a software consulting contract soon. There has
been a two week delay on its start, which has me very anxious but as
far as I can tell the clients still want me to do the job. Their
other engineers are working to solve some technical problem, I would
use their same solution to this problem so I need to wait until they
fix it.

The contract would pay really well. Not enough that I could live
independently but it would give me the cash I would require to
advertise my consultancy. I'm planning to send direct mail - junk
mail - to software companies around Portland, Vancouver and Seattle.
Each "piece" will include a trifold brochure, a cover letter and a
business card. I already have the list of companies, having compiled
it while I was searching for a job.

It is upsetting to me that the burglar ran me out of my home, but even
so, I am uninjured, and today is a beautiful day here in Portland. I
won't let it get me down.