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Which way do you hang your toilet paper? Explain why in comments.

Displaying poll results.
Overhand
  64% 109 votes
Underhand
  11% 19 votes
Vertical, dispensed from nearside
  2% 4 votes
Vertical, dispensed from farside
0% 1 votes
Perpendicular to wall, dispensed from nearside
  2% 4 votes
Perpendicular to wall, dispensed from farside
0% 1 votes
Bidet all the way
  5% 9 votes
Other
  13% 22 votes
169 total votes.
[ Voting Booth | Other Polls | Back Home ]
  • Don't complain about lack of options. You've got to pick a few when you do multiple choice. Those are the breaks.
  • Feel free to suggest poll ideas if you're feeling creative. I'd strongly suggest reading the past polls first.
  • This whole thing is wildly inaccurate. Rounding errors, ballot stuffers, dynamic IPs, firewalls. If you're using these numbers to do anything important, you're insane.
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(1)
  • (Score: 4, Funny) by fyngyrz on Sunday April 01, @08:10PM (3 children)

    by fyngyrz (6567) Subscriber Badge on Sunday April 01, @08:10PM (#661224) Homepage Journal

    The responses to this poll will definitely consist of a tissue of lies. Truth will be wiped out. There's no way to paper this one over; we'll just have to roll with it as best we can. No sheet, man.

    Okay, that's enough. I'm going bowling now.

    --
    The eyes are the windows to the soul.
    Sunglasses are the window shades.
    • (Score: 3, Funny) by acid andy on Friday April 06, @05:00PM (2 children)

      by acid andy (1683) on Friday April 06, @05:00PM (#663484)

      Okay, that's enough. I'm going bowling now.

      Yeah, I figured you might peel off and leave us to absorb what you said. The poll will certainly flush out any unusual habits. That's the long and short of it.

      --
      Make hay whilst the intervening mass is insufficient to inhibit the perceived intensity of incoming solar radiation.
      • (Score: 1, Informative) by Anonymous Coward on Friday April 06, @07:44PM

        by Anonymous Coward on Friday April 06, @07:44PM (#663527)

        CowboyNeal wipes my ass for me you insensitive clod!

      • (Score: 2) by KiloByte on Monday April 09, @07:34PM

        by KiloByte (375) on Monday April 09, @07:34PM (#664620)

        Mere flushing out of wrong habits is not enough. You need to at least fling poop [skadicomic.com] at heretics, even those who claim a higher authority. If that fails, use torches and pitchforks.

        --
        Ceterum censeo systemd esse delendam.
  • (Score: 3, Informative) by Fnord666 on Sunday April 01, @08:24PM (5 children)

    by Fnord666 (652) Subscriber Badge on Sunday April 01, @08:24PM (#661230)
    Clearly there is only one answer, as you can see from the patent [google.com].
    • (Score: 4, Touché) by Gaaark on Monday April 02, @12:15AM (3 children)

      by Gaaark (41) Subscriber Badge on Monday April 02, @12:15AM (#661278) Homepage Journal

      The patent system is clearly broken.

      --
      --- That's not flying: that's... falling... with more luck than I have. ---
      • (Score: 4, Interesting) by Zinho on Monday April 02, @02:39PM (1 child)

        by Zinho (759) on Monday April 02, @02:39PM (#661483)

        I don't know, in 1891 when that patent was filed it may have been a legitimate innovation. It's long since expired now, and the design seems to have passed the test of time.

        I won't begrudge the inventor the monopoly he enjoyed until 9/15/1911.

        --
        "Space Exploration is not endless circles in low earth orbit." -Buzz Aldrin
        • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday April 04, @06:49PM

          by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday April 04, @06:49PM (#662582)

          Also remember that women couldn't vote back then. And nobody is fooling the cat anyway.

      • (Score: 5, Funny) by DannyB on Tuesday April 03, @05:15PM

        by DannyB (5839) on Tuesday April 03, @05:15PM (#662042)

        But officer! I was NOT paying for sex! It was just a licensing fee to the patent holder.

    • (Score: 2) by DannyB on Tuesday April 03, @05:02PM

      by DannyB (5839) on Tuesday April 03, @05:02PM (#662034)

      Are we really worried about the patent on which way the roll dispenses the paper?

      I would be more concerned about the patent on this. [thevintagenews.com] (splinter free toilet paper!)

  • (Score: 2) by aristarchus on Monday April 02, @12:05AM (6 children)

    by aristarchus (2645) Subscriber Badge on Monday April 02, @12:05AM (#661275) Journal

    Waiting for the poll to drop,
    releasing comforting reams of sanitary paper,
    and settling forever
    the great question of our time.
        Yours,
                      aristarchus

    --
    #freearistarchus!!!
  • (Score: 4, Interesting) by fliptop on Monday April 02, @01:10AM (23 children)

    by fliptop (1666) on Monday April 02, @01:10AM (#661294) Journal

    No one puts the roll on the tank lid? No hanger necessary!

    --
    It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide.
    • (Score: 2) by chromas on Monday April 02, @04:27AM

      by chromas (34) on Monday April 02, @04:27AM (#661331)

      Good point! I could edit, but there aren't any more answer slots :(

    • (Score: 3, Insightful) by The Mighty Buzzard on Monday April 02, @11:26AM (7 children)

      I don't like reaching over my shoulder so I just set the roll on top of the roll holder. Every now and then some well-meaning visitor will come over and put it on the roll holder properly for some reason but I just take it right back off.

      --
      My preferred pronouns are wetback/faggot/cunt. Your move.
      • (Score: 2) by looorg on Monday April 02, @11:32AM

        by looorg (578) on Monday April 02, @11:32AM (#661401)

        I was just about to write something like this. I do have a roll in the holder, but I also just stand one on top of the holder. I guess the one in the holder is mostly for other peoples convenience really. Having it just standing on top, or I guess I could just have had a shelf to put it on works the best from all positions -- standing or sitting it's easy to grab. If you stand and it's in the holder if you are a taller person you have to bend to grab some paper and that is annoying. So I just put it on top of the holder instead.

      • (Score: 2) by Zinho on Monday April 02, @02:50PM (4 children)

        by Zinho (759) on Monday April 02, @02:50PM (#661494)

        Sounds like you're voting for vertical; do you prefer clockwise or countercockwise as a direction for the paper to unroll?

        --
        "Space Exploration is not endless circles in low earth orbit." -Buzz Aldrin
      • (Score: 4, Insightful) by Nuke on Monday April 02, @06:39PM

        by Nuke (3162) on Monday April 02, @06:39PM (#661611)

        I just set the roll on top of the roll holder. Every now and then some well-meaning visitor will come over and put it on the roll holder properly for some reason

        A reason is that if not in a holder it can be knocked off onto the floor or even straight down the pan. Especially if my small nephew goes in there pissing half his load on the floor and flailing his arms around, as is his habit. And don't get me started on those "convenient" half-a-coathanger minimalist roll holders either, because rolls can be knocked clean off those too, especially if the room is a bit narrow and being used by someone the size of my mother-in-law.

        Give me roll holders that need a set of tools to get the roll out.

    • (Score: 4, Funny) by JoeMerchant on Monday April 02, @12:04PM (9 children)

      by JoeMerchant (3937) on Monday April 02, @12:04PM (#661404)

      My wife has a stool near the TP hanger, and a collection of 95%+ used rolls on it. I don't know if I'm supposed to use the last 5% or what?

      • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @01:15PM

        by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @01:15PM (#661434)

        You're the man. You make the economies.

      • (Score: 5, Funny) by Nuke on Monday April 02, @06:42PM

        by Nuke (3162) on Monday April 02, @06:42PM (#661614)

        a collection of 95%+ used rolls on it. I don't know if I'm supposed to use the last 5% or what?

        95% used? Yuk.

      • (Score: 2) by Freeman on Tuesday April 03, @06:24PM (1 child)

        by Freeman (732) on Tuesday April 03, @06:24PM (#662069) Journal

        You're not the only one with that problem. Apparently there's something defective with the last 5% left on the roll.

        --
        "I said in my haste, All men are liars." Psalm 116:11
        • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday April 05, @05:35AM

          by Anonymous Coward on Thursday April 05, @05:35AM (#662788)

          Maybe she was saving them for tamp-ins?

      • (Score: 4, Funny) by Whoever on Wednesday April 04, @06:02AM (1 child)

        by Whoever (4524) on Wednesday April 04, @06:02AM (#662371) Journal

        Exactly what kind of stool are we talking about?

      • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 09, @03:44PM

        by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 09, @03:44PM (#664499)

        My mother and sister would always leave a single square left on the roll and get out and start using a new one. WTF.

      • (Score: 2) by acid andy on Tuesday April 10, @02:46PM (1 child)

        by acid andy (1683) on Tuesday April 10, @02:46PM (#664960)

        Is the last 5% the bit that has the glue all over it? That might explain the thought process.

        --
        Make hay whilst the intervening mass is insufficient to inhibit the perceived intensity of incoming solar radiation.
    • (Score: 2) by Zinho on Monday April 02, @02:48PM (3 children)

      by Zinho (759) on Monday April 02, @02:48PM (#661491)

      Standing on the tank lid counts as "vertical"; i.e., the roll's central axis is parallel to the wall, perpendicular to the floor.

      Follow-up question for you: do you find you have a preference for which way the paper is oriented? By this I mean unrolling clockwise vs counterclockwise when viewed from the top.

      --
      "Space Exploration is not endless circles in low earth orbit." -Buzz Aldrin
      • (Score: 2) by fliptop on Tuesday April 03, @02:03AM (2 children)

        by fliptop (1666) on Tuesday April 03, @02:03AM (#661762) Journal

        Standing on the tank lid counts as "vertical"; i.e., the roll's central axis is parallel to the wall, perpendicular to the floor.

        If it's lying on its side (axis parallel to the floor) that's OK too. My only preference is that it be w/in reach and there's enough that I won't run out. That's the other great thing about using the tank lid, there's room for more than one just in case the current roll is getting low.

        The reason I don't have/like hangers is b/c it's just another damn thing that has to be cleaned.

        --
        It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide.
        • (Score: 2) by Zinho on Tuesday April 03, @02:30AM (1 child)

          by Zinho (759) on Tuesday April 03, @02:30AM (#661771)

          Doesn't it tend to roll off if it's on its side?

          --
          "Space Exploration is not endless circles in low earth orbit." -Buzz Aldrin
          • (Score: 2) by fliptop on Tuesday April 03, @03:50AM

            by fliptop (1666) on Tuesday April 03, @03:50AM (#661801) Journal

            Doesn't it tend to roll off if it's on its side?

            It's only happened to me once. I hurt my back and couldn't reach behind me w/ my right hand to grab the roll. When I went to use my left I bumped it w/ my elbow and it rolled off the tank onto the floor. But I presume that would've happened no matter which way it was oriented.

            --
            It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide.
  • (Score: 3, Funny) by mendax on Monday April 02, @02:14AM

    by mendax (2840) on Monday April 02, @02:14AM (#661303)

    That's why God made left hands! I'm going to get flamed now.

    --
    It's really quite a simple choice: Life, Death, or Los Angeles.
  • (Score: 1, Informative) by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @03:21AM (4 children)

    by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @03:21AM (#661317)

    Use the shower to deliver a cleansing volley of water straight to the ass. Fresher and cleaner than your TP'd bunghole will ever be.

    • (Score: 5, Funny) by Ethanol-fueled on Monday April 02, @05:14AM

      by Ethanol-fueled (2792) Subscriber Badge on Monday April 02, @05:14AM (#661334) Homepage

      This happened at my place once, conveniently while friends were visiting from out of town. They had to go and fast, and it took more time than usual, but they emerged fresh all over.

      In fact, I rarely use my own toilet paper for that very reason. All situations where I take a shit involve a shower directly afterward, with rare exceptions when I eat too many habanero chiles or otherwise know I don't have to interact with people that day. The rolls of paper are loaded into one of those cheap Home Depot-branded recessed sheet-metal dispensers, overhand, though sometimes I get lazy and just sit the roll on the top lid of my toilet tank next to my C++ textbook.

      I have no idea how people can conduct business with others or living through their day while having a dirty asshole. Even if nobody else can see it, or even smell it, it is every bit as bothersome as that drop-of-coffee stain on your otherwise perfect white oxford.

    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @09:11AM (1 child)

      by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @09:11AM (#661379)
      Yeah, I use soap and water. Then towel to dry.

      Toilet paper isn't a very effective way of removing shit. It's not bad for removing water if you don't have a towel available.
      • (Score: 2) by Freeman on Tuesday April 03, @06:31PM

        by Freeman (732) on Tuesday April 03, @06:31PM (#662074) Journal

        That's why some rich person invented disposable wipes. More expensive and fresher! Though, entirely possible was some worker drone who's initiative was sucked up into a Corporate machine.

        --
        "I said in my haste, All men are liars." Psalm 116:11
    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday April 08, @01:38PM

      by Anonymous Coward on Sunday April 08, @01:38PM (#663925)

      I try to use bathrooms that have a sink in them and will moisten every other wipe attempt.

      I really appreciate coffee shops that have two or more unisex bathrooms available as it gives me a fighting chance of not losing my only backup option. (coffee has a near instant effect of clearing me out) - I really wish coffee places had 4 or more single person bathrooms - busy restaurants with just one single person bathroom are evil!

  • (Score: 1, Informative) by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @03:26AM (5 children)

    by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @03:26AM (#661320)

    Here I sit... brokenhearted.
    Wanted to shit... but only farted.

    • (Score: 3, Informative) by shortscreen on Monday April 02, @09:22AM (2 children)

      by shortscreen (2252) Subscriber Badge on Monday April 02, @09:22AM (#661380) Journal

      He who writes on shithouse walls
      rolls his shit into little balls
      he who reads these tales of wit
      eats the little balls of shit

      (seen at a PA campground 1994-ish)

      • (Score: 2) by Thexalon on Monday April 02, @03:05PM

        by Thexalon (636) Subscriber Badge on Monday April 02, @03:05PM (#661501) Homepage

        "Pooper, may everything turn out okay so that you can leave this place." - Seen in Pompeii, c. 70 CE.

        --
        A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of bad gravy.
      • (Score: 3, Touché) by Snotnose on Monday April 02, @04:41PM

        by Snotnose (1623) on Monday April 02, @04:41PM (#661563)

        Here I sit, cheeks a flexin
        Giving birth to another Texan

        --
        Being cremated is my last chance of having a smoking hot body.
    • (Score: 2, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @06:10PM

      by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @06:10PM (#661597)

      Then one day I took a chance,
      Tried to fart and hit my pants.

    • (Score: 2) by pipedwho on Thursday April 05, @06:49AM

      by pipedwho (2032) on Thursday April 05, @06:49AM (#662807)

      May the rafters of this shithouse
      Upon the bastard fall
      Who with his finger wipes his arse
      And writes upon the wall

  • (Score: 5, Funny) by SomeGuy on Monday April 02, @08:06AM (13 children)

    by SomeGuy (5632) on Monday April 02, @08:06AM (#661365)

    The whole under vs over is actually a perfect example of a user interface where one single way of doing things does not meet every single person's needs.

    Over is typically more convenient. It is easier to grab and roll out.

    However anyone with a cat or toddler may quickly discover that it is TOO convenient, as rolls get unspooled all over the floor. These people will wish hang the TP under-hand, reducing that problem.

    Now, if TP were software then developers would look at the usage metrics, see the majority use over-hand and remove the ability to mount it underhand. After all, metrics tell the entire story, right?

    In the off chance they eventually realized the need they would not back down on their decision and instead introduce a fancy electronic roll-locking mechanism that analyzes wiping habits, dispenses what it thinks is needed which is always wrong, and the collected wiping data is sold to marketing companies.

    And then eventually TP dispensers devolve in to bouncing, bobbing, black, blue LED-backlit, monstrosities that don't even let you get any TP unless you authenticate with their cloud, it verifies you are using it in only an approved manner, and you have not tampered with it in any way such as turning off the blue LEDs.

    Want to go back to the old simple TP holder that just lets you mount it whichever way you wanted? Can't do that, the old ones are "insecure", "bad for the planet", "incompatible with new sewers", or some BS like that.

    • (Score: 2) by JoeMerchant on Monday April 02, @12:07PM (2 children)

      by JoeMerchant (3937) on Monday April 02, @12:07PM (#661406)

      Now, if TP were software then developers would look at the usage metrics, see the majority use over-hand and remove the ability to mount it underhand. After all, metrics tell the entire story, right?

      Maintenance and testing costs of the additional usage mode are too high to justify its continued support. The minority of non-compliant users will learn to do it like everybody else, making support scripts easier to write and enabling future focus on development in more meaningful areas like toothpaste tube usage.

      • (Score: 2) by chromas on Wednesday April 04, @03:21AM (1 child)

        by chromas (34) on Wednesday April 04, @03:21AM (#662321)

        I see you're in line with the FreeDesktop & Gnome devs. Do you work for RedHat? All you're missing is "why would you want to do that?"

    • (Score: 2) by bob_super on Monday April 02, @04:25PM

      by bob_super (1357) on Monday April 02, @04:25PM (#661554)

      Almost perfect, yet you forgot that the dispenser would take a 15-minute update every third time you use it, occasionally refuse to dispense anything until rebooted twice and reverted to the previous version, and every second week dump the remainder of the roll straight in the toilet without warning (warning will be added later that your paper was deemed "unfresh").
      This will all lead to a new game called synchronized core dumps, which no-one really ever wins.

    • (Score: 2) by Osamabobama on Monday April 02, @07:28PM (1 child)

      by Osamabobama (5842) on Monday April 02, @07:28PM (#661637)

      I think the venerable car analogy has met its match. This should be forwarded to the standards committee as a candidate to replace it.

      --
      Appended to the end of comments you post. Max: 120 chars.
      • (Score: 1) by DECbot on Wednesday April 04, @01:05AM

        by DECbot (832) on Wednesday April 04, @01:05AM (#662274) Journal

        Why bother? Your proposal will just wind up getting flushed down the toilet in the end.

        --
        cats~$ sudo chown -R us /home/base
    • (Score: 2) by ElizabethGreene on Tuesday April 03, @08:58PM (1 child)

      by ElizabethGreene (6748) on Tuesday April 03, @08:58PM (#662168)

      Spot on for the reasoning for underhanding it. My cats love overhand rolls.

    • (Score: 3, Funny) by Runaway1956 on Wednesday April 04, @02:59PM (2 children)

      by Runaway1956 (2926) Subscriber Badge on Wednesday April 04, @02:59PM (#662505) Journal

      However anyone with a cat or toddler

      We've sacrificed a few rolls to toddlers. Ehh, it's all part of raising kids, right?

      I happen to be married to a cat lady. If I raise to much hell about the cats, she'll tell me, "If I have to choose between you or the cats, your ass is gone!" Well - cats. Unlike toddlers, the damned cats will destroy an entire CASE of paper, and go in search of something new to tear apart. I came home once, to find that they had torn into a brand new six pack of paper, that hadn't even been opened.

      I finally had enough, and bought a cheap little cabinet. It has two shelves, between them, enough space to store the largest package of paper normally found in grocery stores. Beneath the shelves are a couple towel rack thingies. Those dowels aren't removeable, so I can't put the rolls on top of those dowels. But, the rolls do lie nicely on top of the dowels. This whole thing is mounted on the wall, within reach of the throne, and just high enough that the cats can't reach it.

      So far, the cats haven't figured out that they might leap, and snag a roll before they fall.

      --
      Death smiles at everyone. Sailors smile back.
      • (Score: 4, Funny) by srobert on Tuesday April 10, @02:58AM (1 child)

        by srobert (4803) on Tuesday April 10, @02:58AM (#664792)

        I'm somewhat of a cat guy. My wife doesn't like the cats as much in part because of things like the toilet paper. She used to say "You love those damn cats more than you love me!" I always responded "That is not true. I don't love the cats any more than I love you."

    • (Score: 2) by TheRaven on Thursday April 05, @01:38PM

      by TheRaven (270) on Thursday April 05, @01:38PM (#662905) Journal

      Over is typically more convenient. It is easier to grab and roll out.

      It depends on the dispenser. I prefer under in ones that have a cover that rests on the paper, because the cover then creates a small amount of resistance if you pull slowly and a large amount if you pull quickly, so you can easily tear off the paper by pulling hard. You can't do that with an over configuration unless you have a rear-facing weight.

      --
      sudo mod me up
    • (Score: 2) by number11 on Saturday April 14, @06:37AM

      by number11 (1170) on Saturday April 14, @06:37AM (#666829)

      Over is typically more convenient. It is easier to grab and roll out.

      However anyone with a cat or toddler may quickly discover that it is TOO convenient, as rolls get unspooled all over the floor. These people will wish hang the TP under-hand, reducing that problem.

      Really? I was always in the underhand school, no idea why except that's how my mother insisted on it. I've had many cats, who were rarely interested. Then I got a cat that found having the TP against the wall meant he could unspool by just doing a scratching motion. So I switched to overhand.

      But that was the cat who knew how to open doors by jumping up and grabbing the door knob (not handle, that would have been too easy) between his paws.

  • (Score: 2, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @09:27AM (2 children)

    by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @09:27AM (#661381)
    Get with the times and learn how to use the three seashells!
  • (Score: 3, Funny) by turgid on Monday April 02, @01:28PM (2 children)

    by turgid (4318) on Monday April 02, @01:28PM (#661445) Journal

    Cool and soothing [andrex.co.uk], ideal for curry fans.

    --
    Don't let Righty keep you down. #freearistarchus!!!
    • (Score: 3, Informative) by Zinho on Monday April 02, @02:32PM (1 child)

      by Zinho (759) on Monday April 02, @02:32PM (#661478)

      If you're flushing those, your city engineer hates you.

      --
      "Space Exploration is not endless circles in low earth orbit." -Buzz Aldrin
      • (Score: 1, Informative) by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @06:44PM

        by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 02, @06:44PM (#661616)

        Your plumber, on the other hand, loves you.

  • (Score: 2) by fliptop on Tuesday April 03, @02:13AM (1 child)

    by fliptop (1666) on Tuesday April 03, @02:13AM (#661766) Journal

    ...but I was reminded of bathroom scenes from two different movies. It seems the Marines [youtube.com] have hangers, but the Army [youtube.com] doesn't.

    --
    It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in snide.
    • (Score: 2) by Runaway1956 on Thursday April 05, @02:40PM

      by Runaway1956 (2926) Subscriber Badge on Thursday April 05, @02:40PM (#662937) Journal

      The deck, the shitter, and everything else rocks and rolls under a Gyrene. He needs something to prevent his paper sloshing away in the bilge water. Land grunts? The only time the latrine moves under their feet, is when enemy artillery is hammering the shit out of them. At which point, no one's worried about any paper anyway. The two services each have their priorities straight.

      --
      Death smiles at everyone. Sailors smile back.
  • (Score: 2) by realDonaldTrump on Tuesday April 03, @05:48AM

    by realDonaldTrump (6614) Subscriber Badge on Tuesday April 03, @05:48AM (#661827) Homepage Journal

    It rings a chime. My toilet attendant brings me a stack of toilet paper and a stack of damp washcloths.

    --
    Text TRUMP to 88022 to join the #TrumpTrain [facebook.com]!
  • (Score: 2) by DannyB on Tuesday April 03, @05:08PM

    by DannyB (5839) on Tuesday April 03, @05:08PM (#662038)

    I was reminded of this [amazon.com] and similar printed toilet paper products on Amazon.

  • (Score: 2) by Freeman on Tuesday April 03, @06:37PM

    by Freeman (732) on Tuesday April 03, @06:37PM (#662077) Journal

    Brent Weeks, "Perfect Shadow", Chapter #1 (Maybe it was the prologue?).

    --
    "I said in my haste, All men are liars." Psalm 116:11
  • (Score: 2) by Subsentient on Tuesday April 03, @08:13PM

    I personally prefer free-sitting roles on a counter or something, so I can quickly and efficiently wrap my hand in what I need without worrying about tearing or something. It's faster and more comfortable for me, and I'm a heretic who buys Scott 1000 and then uses a lot of it, so having it easy to quickly get a lot of it is important.
    --
    Instead of getting bogged down in the infuriating details, focus on the unquestionably terrible big picture. -The Onion
  • (Score: 1) by Sulla on Wednesday April 04, @08:23PM (2 children)

    by Sulla (5173) on Wednesday April 04, @08:23PM (#662622) Journal

    Bidet's are for people in countries with bad plumbing.

  • (Score: 2) by KritonK on Thursday April 05, @11:17AM (2 children)

    by KritonK (465) on Thursday April 05, @11:17AM (#662868)

    ...and I didn't even know that there was a term for that, nor that there is an entire Wikipedia article [wikipedia.org] dedicated to the subject, which I had to consult, before answering the poll!

    • (Score: 1) by Kalas on Thursday April 05, @06:15PM

      by Kalas (4247) on Thursday April 05, @06:15PM (#663029)

      >81 citations
      Goddamn!
      Well I guess it's comforting that that are always bigger nerds than I on this planet.

    • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 09, @09:23AM

      by Anonymous Coward on Monday April 09, @09:23AM (#664315)

      Thanks for pointing to that article. I honestly had no idea to which of the two configurations "overhand" and "underhand" refer.

  • (Score: 2) by Valkor on Friday April 06, @02:51AM

    by Valkor (4253) on Friday April 06, @02:51AM (#663251) Homepage

    Other: Sitting on top of the laundry bin. I've never once used the hanger.

  • (Score: 2) by acid andy on Friday April 06, @02:33PM (1 child)

    by acid andy (1683) on Friday April 06, @02:33PM (#663430)

    I was taught as a child that the overhand style is considered uncouth. I found this plausible because to my eye, the loose end hanging in the foreground in empty space is less aesthetically pleasing than it hanging at the back, close to the parallel surface of the wall. I find the appearance of the horizon of the bottom edge of the roll arcing gently out of sight against the subtle background of the hanging loose end somewhat pleasing too in the latter configuration.

    One family member unfortunately took this underhand religious tenet to extremes, forcing it upon a roll holder that was designed for overhand dispensation only. Imagine a spring-loaded, curved sleeve of metal that presses over the top of the roll, holding it in place. When the roll is loaded overhand, the paper slides freely past the edge of the metal. In an underhand configuration however, the sharp metal edge formed a hideous ratchet making the poor, tormented roll scrape and jump and judder against it. A terrible perversion of toilet paper etiquette.

    --
    Make hay whilst the intervening mass is insufficient to inhibit the perceived intensity of incoming solar radiation.
    • (Score: 2) by KritonK on Friday April 06, @04:38PM

      by KritonK (465) on Friday April 06, @04:38PM (#663479)

      I was taught as a child that the overhand style is considered uncouth.

      That's the same reason that I prefer underhand: I always thought that overhand was uncouth. Nobody taught me that way, however; I just came up with the notion myself as a kid.

  • (Score: 2) by Azuma Hazuki on Monday April 09, @08:13PM (3 children)

    by Azuma Hazuki (5086) Subscriber Badge on Monday April 09, @08:13PM (#664644) Journal

    Maybe I'm just really paranoid, but I try to only drop a deuce at home and take a good long shower after. TP goes on overhand, and will stay that way until one or more cats move in with me, at which point it will go underhand. And why, why, why do US toilets not have bidets? Think how much paper we could save with SK or Japan-style washlets!

    ...for that matter, why do we shit in perfectly good drinkable water? We should be routing grey water to toilets.

    --
    I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
    • (Score: 3, Interesting) by fyngyrz on Wednesday April 11, @04:45AM

      by fyngyrz (6567) Subscriber Badge on Wednesday April 11, @04:45AM (#665228) Homepage Journal

      We should be routing grey water to toilets.

      Grey water isn't friendly to the various plumbing bits and pieces as clean water is. Maintenance becomes more of an issue. Likely the toilet bowl would stain faster, too... I would hope that most people have a pretty regular cleaning schedule anyway, but... you know.

      Although there are toilets that have a sink on top, where the drain goes to the tank. [plumbingmall.com]

      --
      The eyes are the windows to the soul.
      Sunglasses are the window shades.
    • (Score: 2) by fraxinus-tree on Monday April 16, @03:08PM (1 child)

      by fraxinus-tree (5590) on Monday April 16, @03:08PM (#667655)

      It depends. On how you treat the waste water afterwards. Grey water, sea water, etc, ... are good if you plan to leave the Nature to deal with the waste somewhere away. If you want to reprocess it (and there are a lot of reasons to do so), in most places drinkable water is your best choice. Well, it depends on how expensive it is. Here we get tap water for 1 euro / 1m3 and swear at the local government for rising the price that much.

      As for the cats - where do you find all these cats that are interested in TP? Mine is not. The previous ones weren't either.

      • (Score: 2) by Azuma Hazuki on Tuesday April 17, @08:12PM

        by Azuma Hazuki (5086) Subscriber Badge on Tuesday April 17, @08:12PM (#668281) Journal

        I dunno, man, that cat with the yellow hair and the obnoxious guttural laugh was all about the TP...

        --
        I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
  • (Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday April 13, @11:48AM

    by Anonymous Coward on Friday April 13, @11:48AM (#666421)

    I just think the whole debate is rather silly. Who cares? Go take a dump and find it's the "wrong" way? FLIP IT AROUND!!!! It's not hard and certainly not worth arguing about.

    We should focus on the really important issues here, like what is the proper direction to sit on the toilet. Seems nearly everyone faces the wrong way. When you sit on the John the proper way is to face the water closet, as it gives you a nice little table for holding your comic books and things. Everyone facing away from it is WRONG WRONG WRONG.

  • (Score: 2) by drussell on Tuesday April 17, @09:52PM

    by drussell (2678) on Tuesday April 17, @09:52PM (#668320) Journal

    In the correct **OVERHAND** fashion, of course!

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