SoylentNews

aristarchus [soylentnews.org] writes:

Another hairy dog story. From everyone's favorite news site, HuffPo! [huffpost.com]

It all started a few weeks back. I started noticing some abnormal behavior. For instance, on our walks, Rex (who is a male purebred golden retriever) would start barking at the Black Labs and Irish Terriers on our street. Sure, I thought it was weird, but I didn’t say anything.

Things grew stranger. One day I came home to find him peeing on the latest issue of The New York Times — a clear statement regarding his thoughts about free press. “THE PRESS IS IN PLACE TO PROTECT CITIZENS!” I screamed. The next day? I dropped him off at the groomer for an appointment. When I picked him up his hair was extremely short on the sides and long on top. I certainly did not ask for that haircut. “What in Elizabeth Warren’s name is going on?”

Yes, it is two years old, hardly breaking news, but it is about dogs.

That’s when I began to talk to my friends. Was I this out of touch with the Middle-America dog community? Was I so trapped inside my own elite dog-bubble that I couldn’t see this coming? I mean, I know white men support Trump, but white dogs? They thought I was just being paranoid.

I started having a recurring nightmare. I’d walk into my house and hear a muffled kind of sound. I’d follow the noise into my living room and see my dog barking into a burner phone. When I picked the phone up to see who was on the other side the caller ID would read “Richard Spencer” with a heart emoji next to it. I’d wake up in a sweat clutching my Barack Obama action figure.

Perhaps this chap needs to find out about this article [washingtonian.com], so he can help his dog come back from the dank side.

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