The docks are eerily quiet at Cologne's main port on the mighty River Rhine, with hundreds of containers piled up and awaiting their journey north on one of Europe's busiest commercial arteries.
Months of scarce rainfall and hot sunny weather drove water levels on the Rhine to a record low, forcing ship operators to suspend services to keep vessels from running aground.
"We haven't had any new ships in Cologne since last week—they stop in Duisburg" 80 kilometres (50 miles) north, Oliver Grossmann, head of shipping company CTS, told AFP.
He said that under normal conditions, "three or four" of his big vessels would stop each day in the city known for its Gothic cathedral.
The few barges still chugging along the river have had to drastically reduce their cargo to stay afloat.
They should ship the containers by zeppelins instead.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday October 24 2018, @11:00AM (2 children)
At least they are solving one big problem.
(Score: 2) by DannyB on Wednesday October 24 2018, @01:53PM (1 child)
Are the corpses an effective method of carbon sequestration?
What doesn't kill me makes me weaker for next time.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Thursday October 25 2018, @12:47PM
More like aqueous religious suppression
(Score: 2) by driverless on Wednesday October 24 2018, @11:06AM (9 children)
Since the Rhine has thousands of years of sunken shipping all the way up and down it, this would be an ideal time to break out the metal detectors and take a stroll along the exposed riverbed...
(Score: 3, Interesting) by BsAtHome on Wednesday October 24 2018, @12:02PM (3 children)
Archeologists are having very busy days. A lot of ancient stuff is resurfacing and needs to be looked at.
Then there is the ammunition and bombs from WWII. That too is resurfacing.
(Score: 1, Troll) by NPC-131072 on Wednesday October 24 2018, @01:00PM (2 children)
WWII is resurfacing because orange man bad.
(Score: 2) by DannyB on Wednesday October 24 2018, @01:58PM (1 child)
An executive order can raise the water level.
What doesn't kill me makes me weaker for next time.
(Score: 2) by Fluffeh on Wednesday October 24 2018, @10:39PM
I'm pretty sure the US has already reneged on the Paris Climate Agreement.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday October 24 2018, @01:53PM (1 child)
While you are at it, pick some of the tomatos and watermelons that have been growing in the riverbed.
(Score: 2) by fritsd on Wednesday October 24 2018, @03:46PM
If it's rusty, weighs 500 kg, and has four stabilization fins, then it's NOT a watermelon and you'd best not try to cut it open but call the explosives people instead.
I guess you could go looking for the legendary Rheingold [wikipedia.org].. or was that near Koblenz??
(Score: 2) by DannyB on Wednesday October 24 2018, @01:57PM
In addition to 'metail' detectors, try using detectors that identify 'mettle' and 'metal'.
We could use people with more mettle who don't need safe spaces. We could use more metal to construct things that displace trees.
What doesn't kill me makes me weaker for next time.
(Score: 2) by Rich on Wednesday October 24 2018, @03:46PM
Not only sunken shipping, but a sunken steam locomotive too:
https://www.wsj.com/articles/treasure-hunt-on-the-rhine-is-for-iron-not-gold-1536513344 [wsj.com]
(Score: 2) by richtopia on Wednesday October 24 2018, @03:51PM
It is a thing:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magnet_fishing [wikipedia.org]
(Score: 2) by JoeMerchant on Wednesday October 24 2018, @11:09AM (1 child)
Attach the Zeppelins to the barges to increase their carrying capacity - hell on the bridges, tho.
🌻🌻 [google.com]
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday October 24 2018, @11:41AM
A friendly passing Heterodyne could help with that!
(Score: 2) by c0lo on Wednesday October 24 2018, @11:18AM (4 children)
... the Riesling should be phenomenal on the Rhine valley this year.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
(Score: 4, Funny) by hedleyroos on Wednesday October 24 2018, @12:14PM (3 children)
The words "riesling" and "phenomenal" can never be uttered in the same sentence, unless you say "I threw away this sweet riesling and switched to a phenomenal sauvignon blanc".
(Score: 3, Insightful) by c0lo on Wednesday October 24 2018, @12:40PM (2 children)
De gustibus non est disputandum
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
(Score: 1) by hedleyroos on Wednesday October 24 2018, @01:17PM (1 child)
Hehe I'm South African - our palettes are different. I'm kidding of course. Enjoy the riesling.
(Score: 2) by c0lo on Wednesday October 24 2018, @01:35PM
The only decent Chardonnay I could get in Australia was an imported French one - the Ozzies are too deep into rich, heavy reds.
Perhaps that's where my frustration comes from.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
(Score: 2) by Bot on Wednesday October 24 2018, @12:22PM (3 children)
I ordered a koelsh, it came in a 0.20cc glass. So sad. I think WWII is still going on there.
Account abandoned.
(Score: 3, Funny) by c0lo on Wednesday October 24 2018, @12:48PM
You mean Kölsch? You gotta thank Pai for that, your net connection is surely dropping packets, with you beer download being more than half lost, likely being shaped away by your ISP.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoFiw2jMy-0 https://soylentnews.org/~MichaelDavidCrawford
(Score: 2) by Phoenix666 on Thursday October 25 2018, @01:34AM (1 child)
Which koelsch would that be? There are lots. Some of them are fine, some are awful.
Washington DC delenda est.
(Score: 2) by Bot on Monday October 29 2018, @06:15PM
Sorry I don't recall the brand, I was too busy WTFin'.
Account abandoned.