The manufacturers of a pioneering video game controller that doubles as a virtual reality male sex toy have pulled it off the market after being swamped by demand.
VirtuaDolls is a system which allows hi-tech heavy breathers to strap on a VR helmet, sleep with simulated women and be pleasured by a device which responds to on-screen eroticism.
This could, for instance, allow gamers to watch a cyber-siren twerking whilst the silicon sex toy pulsates in time with her every gyration.
So many men rushed to pre-order this device on the crowdfunding site Indiegogo that its designers were forced to "put the project on hold".
In a series of tweets, the firm behind Virtuadolls admitted demand for their virtual vagina had been enormous.
At last, the inevitable.
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Various news outlets report on a study of ten people who were asked by a 58 cm (23-inch), speaking, humanoid robot to touch various parts of its structure.
Changes in the conductivity of the participants' skin were measured, along with reaction time. When they touched parts of the robot corresponding to the eyes, buttocks, or crotch, changes in conductivity and reaction time were greater than when the robot's head, neck or hands were touched. The investigators say that this indicates an "emotional response."
It was found that a touch where the robot's buttocks or genitals would be produced a measurable response of arousal in the volunteer human, the scientists report.
"Our work shows that robots are a new form of media that is particularly powerful. It shows that people respond to robots in a primitive, social way," said Jamy Li, a mechanical engineer at Stanford University in California, who led the study. "Social conventions regarding touching someone else's private parts apply to a robot's body parts as well. The research has implications for both robot design and the theory of artificial systems."
The results are to be presented in June at the International Communication Association Conference in Fukuoka, Japan.
A video depicting the experimental procedure is available. Wikipedia has a page about the robot.
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @08:10AM
This looks awesome. And it will appeal to basement dwellers who are good at making mods. And the sdk is all open and free to use.
Genuinely looking forward to it. Lucky I live alone (but surely you already guessed that).
(Score: 1, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @08:27AM
This is exactly how society ends.
It was prophesied...
http://smbc-comics.com/index.php?id=3983 [smbc-comics.com]
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @03:26PM
It isn't like we weren't warned [cc.com].
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @09:02AM
https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Jpbw6E_aRPM/UUMliDgU8qI/AAAAAAAAFEM/uc39fYZEOcw/s1600/IN312E~1.JPG [blogspot.com]
(Score: 1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @09:54AM
I figure a truly useful sexbot would blow...other things as well.
(Score: -1, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @10:24AM
Wouldn't exist if men could pursue happiness.
Cunts banned it tho.
>In the United States, as late as the 1880s most States set the minimum age at 10-12, (in Delaware it was 7 in 1895).[8] Inspired by the "Maiden Tribute" female reformers in the US initiated their own campaign[9] which petitioned legislators to raise the legal minimum age to at least 16, with the ultimate goal to raise the age to 18. The campaign was successful, with almost all states raising the minimum age to 16-18 years by 1920.
>Also: see: Deuteronomy chapter 22 verses 28-29, hebrew allows men to rape girl children and keep them: thus man + girl is obviously fine. Feminists are commanded to be killed as anyone enticing others to follow another ruler/judge/god is to be killed as-per Deuteronomy. It is wonderful when this happens from time to time: celebrate)
(Score: -1, Offtopic) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @01:51PM
I would love to see you with your hands chained to some metal railings, bent over and being mercilessly buggered by a big, fat black Grandma with an enormous strapadicktomy.
(Score: 3, Funny) by Azuma Hazuki on Friday February 05 2016, @05:57PM
Not even a sex bot would do you. Even if it didn't actually have free will. It would somehow mysteriously break every time you got near it. Even machines think you're pathetic.
I am "that girl" your mother warned you about...
(Score: 3, Insightful) by davester666 on Saturday February 06 2016, @12:47AM
no, these companies will cum to the realization that pay-per-use is where the real money is, that straight up selling the device doesn't make them nearly as much money.
And they can sell the information about your 'performance' to a bunch of very eager buyers with things to market to you.
(Score: 3, Funny) by isostatic on Friday February 05 2016, @10:35AM
https://vimeo.com/12915013 [vimeo.com]
Don't Date Robots!
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @10:51AM
Just wait until your SystemD-encumbered virtual robot UEFI pr0n system bricks its hard drive.
Good luck taking that thing to the Geek Squad for repair, may want to wash it off before handing it over the counter to the horrified team member standing there...
(Score: 5, Funny) by Nuke on Friday February 05 2016, @10:57AM
Good luck taking that thing to the Geek Squad for repair, may want to wash it off before handing it over
I'd wash it off after taking it back too.
(Score: 3, Informative) by Pslytely Psycho on Friday February 05 2016, @12:04PM
You make a good point, what, exactly would be their 'testing process' after a warrenty repair....
Reminds me of a sign I saw on a sex shop in Missiouri once:
NEW FLESHLIGHTS FOR SALE!
and all I could think of afterwards was...."is there a market for USED ones?" ugh!
Alex Jones lawyer inspires new TV series: CSI Moron Division.
(Score: 4, Funny) by The Archon V2.0 on Friday February 05 2016, @02:53PM
Oddly, the "new" makes me warier than if there was no qualifier on the sign.
I mean, imagine you were at a farmer's market and one guy had a sign "unfucked watermelons for sale".
(Score: 2) by Phoenix666 on Friday February 05 2016, @05:57PM
Canteloupes. Definitely canteloupes.
Or so I read.
Washington DC delenda est.
(Score: 2) by Pslytely Psycho on Saturday February 06 2016, @12:59PM
Yeah, that qualifier....
It made me wonder if they had a barrel of five buck 'ahem' gently used ones.
And now, you've gone and made it even worse!
"unfucked watermelons for sale".
Now, I must clean the Dr. Pepper out of my nose and keyboard.
(;
Alex Jones lawyer inspires new TV series: CSI Moron Division.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @03:06PM
Is there a "Condoms You Have To Use Here" store out there somewhere?
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @11:01AM
Dude, this runs on systemv so it's OK.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @11:10PM
When systems becomes pervasive, we're all fucked.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @11:02AM
i wonder if there will be a API like gateway to siri, cortona and the as yet nameless google chick
for a refreshing interactive threesome?
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @11:06AM
"click here" will "take off" alot more methinks:
"what happend to you? you look positively exhausted?"
"i was clicking through all these "click here" advertisments..."
(Score: 2) by Gravis on Friday February 05 2016, @11:17AM
His Indiegogo campaign raised $7,000 out of its $20,000 goal in just five days.
$7000 isn't a huge amount of money for five days and they didn't even have a prototype, just CG animations. unless the $20K was to build a prototype, they had no hope of succeeding.
(Score: 2) by takyon on Friday February 05 2016, @12:15PM
They might succeed at the alternate goal of scamming backers and blowing the money. Or was that blowing backers and scamming the money?
[SIG] 10/28/2017: Soylent Upgrade v14 [soylentnews.org]
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @01:27PM
No, no, no, you back the blowers and money the scammers. Wait that's not right...
You back the scammers and money the blowers!
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @06:42PM
This bot blows ...
(Score: 2) by q.kontinuum on Friday February 05 2016, @11:22PM
I think it rather sucks...
Registered IRC nick on chat.soylentnews.org: qkontinuum
(Score: 2) by wisnoskij on Friday February 05 2016, @02:57PM
Ya, that's actually really bad. They were not set up to handle less than half the demand that they originally were asking for?
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @11:43AM
Yes indeedy, the future has finally come..
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday February 06 2016, @05:49AM
Hi Mom! [youtube.com]
(Score: 1, Redundant) by bzipitidoo on Friday February 05 2016, @02:11PM
How are women going to p.w. men with these things available? They'll have to up their game, just like Ma Bell had to. Don't have to connect to her jacks anymore. Down with monopolies!
(Score: 2) by tangomargarine on Friday February 05 2016, @02:50PM
"p.w."?
Parser error: Minimum context not available
"Is that really true?" "I just spent the last hour telling you to think for yourself! Didn't you hear anything I said?"
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @03:57PM
I don't think it applies to lesbians, so think "term for a man who will do anything to get some from a woman".
and if that doesn't work, think cats, and long noisy pieces of leather rope on a handle.
(Score: 2) by Phoenix666 on Friday February 05 2016, @06:00PM
Think of the racket: ROWWWWRR WHOMP! ROOWWWWRRRR WHOMP!
Washington DC delenda est.
(Score: 1, Informative) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @05:56PM
I had to pollute my google search to figure it out: "pussy whip." It is apparently used in some "alpha-male" communities to explain why some men let women walk all over them. It refers to the fact that some men will do anything for certain women because they are controlled by sex, which, in turn, is controlled by women.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday February 06 2016, @05:57PM
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3429696/Intimacy-coach-lifts-objects-big-surfboards-vagina-teaches-women-technique-claiming-improves-health-makes-look-younger.html [dailymail.co.uk]
More of pussy-crush than pussy-whip.
(Score: 4, Funny) by tangomargarine on Friday February 05 2016, @02:52PM
This could, for instance, allow gamers to watch a cyber-siren twerking whilst
Ugh. Well I just lost wood.
"Is that really true?" "I just spent the last hour telling you to think for yourself! Didn't you hear anything I said?"
(Score: 2) by Robotron on Friday February 05 2016, @03:31PM
I can only hope the helmet is covered by warranty, and receives adequate maintenance if busted from overuse.
(Score: 2, Funny) by cmdrklarg on Friday February 05 2016, @08:27PM
I bet she gives good helmet!
The world is full of kings and queens who blind your eyes and steal your dreams.
(Score: 2) by davester666 on Saturday February 06 2016, @01:02AM
and definitely be washable.
(Score: 5, Funny) by linkdude64 on Friday February 05 2016, @04:05PM
They're collecting our DNA for the Lizardmen who run the NSA to find out every human's genetic weaknesses so they can create an army of pirate sasquatches where each soldier is specifically engineered to defeat a single person!!!!
Even WORSE, they will make guys stop wanting to pay for dates!!!
(Score: 5, Funny) by Phoenix666 on Friday February 05 2016, @09:02PM
...and so it was that the last pillar propping up the early 21st century American economy crumbled, and the society descended into a maelstrom of cyber hippies and Galtians.
Washington DC delenda est.
(Score: 3, Funny) by linkdude64 on Saturday February 06 2016, @05:44AM
"Maelstrom of cyber hippies"
and atop the jagged remains of M$ headquarters, beneath a halo of lightning, rms will be crowned Eternal StormKing of the Free Robot World.
(Score: 3, Funny) by Anonymous Coward on Friday February 05 2016, @05:34PM
I'd be afraid to use it if Windows had a BSOD... Blow Suck Or Dismember.
(Score: 3, Funny) by q.kontinuum on Friday February 05 2016, @11:27PM
If it runs on Linux it probably blows as intended, if it runs on Windows I guess it still sucks...
Registered IRC nick on chat.soylentnews.org: qkontinuum
(Score: 3, Funny) by coolgopher on Saturday February 06 2016, @12:22AM
And if it's a Linux distro with SystemD you get multiplayer support, aka clusterfuck...
(Score: 3, Funny) by NotSanguine on Saturday February 06 2016, @12:06AM
Maybe I'm in the minority, but I don't need some VR set up to achieve orgasm.
I have this thing called imagination [youtube.com]. That and my hand is more effective than any VR set plus a plastic hole.
Then again, I guess that doesn't work if you don't have any imagination.
I'm all for sex toys. They can be fun when used with a partner (or two or more), but strapping goggles on your head and some kind of plastic orifice on your penis seems pretty dumb to me.
But then, especially given the shortage of product, that just more for you. Have at it.
No, no, you're not thinking; you're just being logical. --Niels Bohr
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday February 06 2016, @04:37PM
Give it a few more years, sunshine, and you'll see. And get off my lawn.
(Score: 2) by NotSanguine on Saturday February 06 2016, @04:44PM
Give it a few more years, sunshine, and you'll see. And get off my lawn.
Not that age is relevant to imagination, but since I'm significantly older than the median age in my country I'm probably older than you -- sunshine. Kisses, sweetheart!
Actually, it's you who is on *my* lawn. And you are welcome here.
No, no, you're not thinking; you're just being logical. --Niels Bohr
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday February 06 2016, @06:01PM
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday February 07 2016, @03:00PM
The robots will need to be programmed to abstain for 7-10 consecutive days of the month. Lawns will be tended and garages cleaned out.