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A Swedish behavioral scientist has suggested that it may be necessary to turn to cannibalism and start eating humans in order to save the planet.
Appearing on Swedish television to talk about an event based around the "food of the future," Magnus Söderlund said he would be holding seminars on the necessity of consuming human flesh in order to stop climate change.
Environmentalists blame the meat and farming industry for a large part of what they claim is the warming of the earth.
According to Söderlund, a potential fix would be the Soylent Green-solution of eating dead bodies instead.
[Ed note: At first I was going to give this story a pass and then, well... this site is called SoylentNews said name being tangentially related to Soylent Green and the tag line is: "SoylentNews is people", so it only goes to follow that you are what you eat, right? Feel free to comment seriously, but I'm quite frankly more interested in what kind of fun the community can have with this story! Some jokes just write themselves. --martyb]
(Score: -1, Insightful) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday September 07 2019, @07:29AM (7 children)
Dont have kids to save the environment
Abort your kids to save the environment
Eat bugs to save the environment
Eat fake meat to save the environment
Eat people to save the environment
(Score: 2) by Bot on Saturday September 07 2019, @11:18AM (2 children)
About the factoid "commies eat kids", should I still classify it as enemy propaganda?
Account abandoned.
(Score: -1, Troll) by Anonymous Coward on Saturday September 07 2019, @05:43PM (1 child)
Dunno. The USSR continued their insane grain quotas in Ukraine even after discovering mothers were feeding weak children to stronger children to keep as many alive as possible.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday September 08 2019, @01:08AM
Yes, when you redistribute the food supply some people may not be able to adjust to the new low calorie diet. This is not stalin's fault. Why would someone who cared for their people kill them?
(Score: 3, Funny) by The Mighty Buzzard on Saturday September 07 2019, @04:14PM
If vegans only eat plant matter and I only eat vegans then I'm even greener than they are since I'm getting rid of inefficient consumers of a major carbon sink!
My rights don't end where your fear begins.
(Score: 2) by Mer on Saturday September 07 2019, @10:28PM
Don't have kids, they'll suffer in tomorrow's environment.
The environment's fucked either way.
Just don't have kids and enjoy yourself by killing the planet.
Shut up!, he explained.
(Score: 2) by Reziac on Sunday September 08 2019, @03:58AM (1 child)
We've all seen a +5 Troll or Flamebait, but I think that's the first time I've seen a -1 Insightful.
And there is no Alkibiades to come back and save us from ourselves.
(Score: 0) by Anonymous Coward on Sunday September 08 2019, @05:18AM
And you ruined it!